((AN: Just so you know what the hell I'm doing... you don't need to take this seriously. It started out as a concept of funny, random and stupid dialogues that I intended to just be the team doing weird and awkward things under the encouragement of Rossi. It made all my friends laugh their asses off, and since people liked it so much I decided to... well, develop it into this story where Rossi is losing his marbles after the years of horror he's faced. Now you may be thinking that it would make more sense if it was Reid going crazy. I agree. But as I went along, I realized it would be too awkward for me to write. So, I stuck with Rossi. Again, you don't have to take this seriously, for it is not meant to be serious. It's just some random fun with a poor side of sadness XD I always appreciate reviews and faves, and hope you enjoy:)
Woman: *runs around laughing hysterically*
Morgan: Are you SURE this'll work?
Rossi: Yeah! It has to. The guy's insane enough to take the bait.
Blake: I'm pretty sure this is illegal.
Reid: And wrong! Don't forget wrong!
Rossi: Don't worry! I've got it handled. She signed a release form and everything.
Morgan: You are one sick little Italian man.
Woman: *is now rolling around in the snow*
Blake: Where'd you even find this woman?
Rossi: In the back of a strip club, high on caffeine pills.
Blake: Really? ...Wait, why were you at a strip club?
Rossi: DON'T YOU JUDGE ME
Morgan: Hey, I see him! *points to a man in the bushes*
Rossi: Told you he was an idiot.
Killer: *jumps out and grabs the woman*
*everybody jumps out of their hiding spot*
Morgan: FB-!
Woman: *tasers the man, he falls to the ground spazzing*
Blake: Oh...?
Reid: ...
Morgan: e.e
Rossi: *turns to the team* Okay, which one of you smart asses gave her a taser?
Reid: I figured that you had given it to her, to apprehend the suspect...?
Rossi: OH. RIGHT. Yes Reid, that was exactly what I planned to happen!
Reid: ...So you're telling me she was at little to no risk whatsoever?
Rossi: Oh course! It'd be wrong for the FBI to just take a random woman, only to get her killed! Silly. *pats Reid's head*
Reid: -3-... Right. *pushes Rossi's hand away*
Morgan: *hauls the guy over* Well, whether or not we're going to hell for it, we got him.
Blake: Won't we get in trouble for this?
Reid: Blake's right, Strauss is going to kill us when we get back. Let alone Hotch...
Rossi: Who says they're ever going to find out? MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA-
Morgan: *smacks the back of Rossi's head*
Rossi: -But yeah, they're never going to know.
Reid: I feel so dirty...
Woman: *walks up and taps Rossi on the shoulder* Ahem...?
Rossi: Hi, yeah?
Woman: Can I have my 50 bucks now?
Rossi: Oh, sure, here you go. *takes out a crumpled bill and hands it to her*
Woman: Thanks! I need this to help pay for my tonsil surgery. They're all swollen; see? *opens her mouth and points*
Rossi: Dear God.
Morgan: PLEASE LEAVE
Woman: Okay, bye now! *skips away*
Reid: Let's please never speak of this night and it's events ever again.
Blake: Agreed.
Rossi: Mmhmm.
Morgan: *to Rossi* I hate you sooooooooooooo fucking much.