I don't own Vampire Knight or Shugo Chara

Most of the stories do explore into dark themes, but hey there will be cursed words, I curse in a lot of my stories and it is freakin' Zero! I give warnings if there might be themes that would make an individual uncomfortable.

I'm really trying to avoid any couples, but if you guys like them or their interactions, run with it. On that note, please I do have gay couples from minor to majors and I don't know how that would be played out. So, if you are disturbed by gay couples, please just leave.

This might be considered AU, as there some changes.

This is Un-beta.

Chapter 1

Those Old Days

Let there be no purpose in friendship save the deepening of the spirit.-Khalil Gibran

"Zero, do you want to go back to Seiyo?" Kaien asked gently, he moved back when he saw Zero tensed at his suggestion. Kaien was very observant of Zero growing up, and he always noticed one thing.

"You, could meet him. There wouldn't be a problem with you leaving a couple months." Kaien flinched behind his desk as Zero glared at him. His lavender eyes slowly becoming purple at his growing rage.

Zero would write letters twice a month, never once missing the time to send it, and he has done this for the past five years.

"I don't know what you are talking about..." Zero sneered, but Kaien had to bite back a squeal. Zero wasn't angry, oh no, Zero was embarrassed. Ignoring the logical side of his brain telling him to back down from making Zero anymore mad, he jumped over to give him a hug.

"Oh, Zero-chan, there isn't-" It was then, did Kaien learn that an embarrassed Zero was slightly more dangerous than an angry Zero. He has to buy a new desk now.

Zero was looking around to find what else he could throw at the buffoon. On, the second thought, those animals have more brain mass than Kaien. He felt bad for insulating such creatures. He could still feel his cheeks burning. The damn bastard had to say such things like that. He made it sound like he was going to see his lover.

Zero tensed at that thought. He thought of Yuuki, but as quickly as she appeared, he pushed her out of his mind. Yuuki chose Kaname, even though she denies it, he hates seeing that want in her eyes. He also knows why Kaname sneers at him on a daily basis. He believes Yuuki loves Zero, but like Zero, Kaname wants her entire heart.

"She can't have us both..." Zero muttered and immediately got out his Bloody Rose when Kaien tried to edge closer to him. He placed his gun back into his holster when he felt that aura emitting off Kaien, the one he puts off to get even his Master to listen to him.

Zero hates, that he has that kind of power.

"I mean it Zero, for six months you can visit him. You can be an exchange student during the months of January or February. During December and January you could stay over there, and during the months of October, November, and March you could visit on Fridays, Saturdays, Sundays, and Mondays." Zero mouth twitched and Kaien didn't miss the expression he made. Even if it was for a split second.

It was disgust.

"You are trying to get rid of me, aren't you?" Kaien stiffed, and if he wasn't using one of his old cards, his mouth would have dropped at that. Get rid of Zero? That's insanity!

"No! What would make you think that?!"

"I just had my first reaction in years two weeks ago. I know those blood suckers didn't sense me, but that Pureblood did. Nothing gets by him." Kaien sank into his seat, putting his legs on his now broken in a half desk. This was the third desk this week, and the first two weren't from Zero this time. Of course, the reaction was bad, but Kaien knew Zero was losing to that monster inside of him. It would be a matter of time when the Hunter Association would order him to put a bullet in Zero's head or heart.

It would be a matter of time when Zero falls to a level E. Zero needs a stronger resolve, and this angst teenage bullshit, pardon his moodiness, was damaging Zero. If Kaien didn't make a promise to Yuuki's mother, he would have probably chopped Kaname's tongue out.

"Hey! Are you even listening?!" Zero growled making Kaien jump. When did he get on top of the desk? Kaien thought, while checking his poor abused heart. "I-I'm sorry, but what was that Zero?" Zero gritted his teeth at that.

"Che, I was saying, who in hell will control me, when I lose it!"

"You won't Zero, you're stronger than that!"

"You know me! You know those who went through this! I will lose control eventually!" Kaien rubbed his face and looked at Zero with sadden eyes and he really looked at Zero. He had puffy cheeks, sweat on his face, he looked paler and he somehow got off his uniform jacket. He was scared.

"Zero, why do want someone to watch over you? I thought you would be delighted at the chance of being away?" Kaien tighten his lips when Zero looked out the window. He had that same look when Kaien picked him from Headquarters, covered in a bloody mess.

Those haunting eyes.

"I don't want to taint the last precious thing I have. I want to believe in those old days," Zero stated, but looked back at Kaien who was croaking in laugher.

"Haha, Zero I don't think you are in any position to make that statement." He had tears coming out his eyes, but he stopped when he got no response from Zero. He was still looking at the window, watching the Day Class roaming around, before twilight struck.

"I think I'm in every position to state that."

"Are you out of your mind?!" Yagari was so close to finally choke the man into the next life. Was the man strong? Yes. Was he intelligent? Debatable. He looked over at Kaien hiding behind his tapped up desk , trembling in fear.

Highly debatable.

"I-I thought that it would be a good idea!" The man whined, and sometimes Yagari couldn't believe the man was older than him. When Zero told him of Kaien's suggestion he was highly skeptical about his motive. Well to be honest Zero never told me why Kaien even made that suggestion, Yagari thought in frustration. Zero had no idea he was actually coming, but because of the buffoon, he got here earlier than planned.

God damn him.

"Any idea spewing from your lips is equivalent to horse shit, " Yagari countered and Kaien tried to calm down by rubbing his temples. The last thing he needed was a shouting match at this time of night.

The man just reminded him of an over puffed cat, trying to look intimidating, and was the man doing a good job of that. Kaien glanced out the window, as if he was expecting Zero to be there, but he saw some Day Class girls, he was sure one of his children will find them. He wants to save his strength for battling Kaname, no doubt the Night Class students would find giving Zero permission to enter another city as a view of favorism.

"I want him to find a reason to live,"

"So, by doing that you want to send him to a city that is a city away from us, without being watched, as a way to find this reason?"

"Yagari, even you know what Kaname is playing at,"

"Everything he does and you do is all about that damn girl, when did you ever thought about doing something for Zero?" At this accusation Kaien immediately stood up. Rage clearly evident on his face, but Yagari held an equal look in his eyes.

"What I am doing here, right now, is for Zero's sake! This has nothing to do with Yuuki or Kaname!" If possible Kaien's eyes narrowed further as Yagari gave out a bark of laughter. Clearly mocking him.

"This has everything to do with those two. I don't know their relationship, but obviously you don't want to admit you fucked up. You fucked up and Kaname is exploiting that and that girl too without realizing it," Yagari marched over to Kaien and he backed up trying to put some distance between himself and Yagari. Kaien keeps forgetting how violent Yagari could be when protecting something he cares about.

"So by sending him away, you hope to banish or lessen those fucking thoughts swarming in my student's head! Thoughts and emotions that were direct consequences from your actions!"

"I want him to see that not everything he does is for Yuuki's sake, the Hunter Association's sake, or, so help me, it not part of Kaname's plan. That he has some free will over this," Kaien tried to state calmly, but anger kept leaking out of his voice, making his argument jagged sounding. Yagari seemed to honed down on that as he countered back, "But it is too late!"

"I do not follow your logic, Yagari-san,"

"The boy knows he doesn't have a free will. He knows he can't make a move without it revolving around those things. They've already broken him, and had you just let me take him-"

"How would that been any different?!" Yagari scoffed at that, and sat on one of Kaien's chairs, ignoring the growing scowl on his face.

"He would have been away from those blood suckers, he wouldn't be reminded every damn day of what he will turn into and be considered less than,"

"Yagari, I understand you care about Zero, but this the best for him," Yagari growled and Kaien immediately went towards the window, there was a growing chance he might have to throw him out of it.

"How? And why now? Everything you did, was intended to help Zero, but in the same time it was still for those two. Sometimes, I wish if maybe, you considered the consequences not on that girl's part, but the boy's part too. Just on the boy's part. Maybe he wouldn't have to feel like a dying weapon." Kaien's eyes soften at that. He keeps forgetting that Yagari raised Zero too, seeing the pain in his student's eyes was a constant reminder of how he failed in protecting Zero from that pain.

"Yagari, this just for Zero, for him to find that human side of him. To realize that side hasn't died yet and maybe encourage him to live,"

"That's not answering my question, Headmaster, I get that, but that's not explaining the timing or why he's going to a certain city." Yagari watched in confusion as Kaien walked past him to one of his closest, he has in the back. Kaien entered the old tattered closet, he keeps forgetting to have it refurnished, but maybe, it was better this way. Zero wouldn't come in here.

Yagari wasn't sure if he should help Kaien who was struggling to reach a box, that was under extreme lock and key. Before he could offer some help, the box fell on top of Kaien's head. Kaien hissed at the stinging sensation blasting on top of his head, but he grabbed the box and dropped it on Yagari's lap, who immediately opened it to find a stack of copied papers.

"What are these?"

"Letters..." Yagari skimmed through them, a feeling started to erupt in his stomach. He was going to kill this man, by the end of the week. He was sure of it.

"Written by, and to whom?"

"Zero wrote these, and I traced the oldest letters, which was copied by his father, but recent ones were by me in case these were ever needed," he pointed at the documents, smiling at Yagari who was trying to hide the smile of Zero's improving writing. "He wrote these to a childhood friend, and has been for five years."

Actually, he might kill him by tomorrow.

"Two questions. One, what do these have anything to do with what we are talking about, and two does Zero know you are invading his privacy and probably broke a couple of his rights?" Yagari pinch the bridge of his noise when Kaien immediately looked away.

This insane man.

"Well, he doesn't know, but hear me out!" Yagari could only sigh at this man's antics. "He writes two letters, twice a month. That's 24 letters in a year, and have done it for five years, meaning he was written over 120 letters, to a childhood friend. I took these in case, Zero need to be reminded there are people who care about him!"

Yagari couldn't decide if he should rip out his hair out, or rip out Kaien's tongue.

"So, you are sending him to Seiyo to visit this friend, but why now Kaien? Stop avoiding the damn question!" he growled at the man, who hanged his head down.

"He had an attack," Kaien watched as Yagari closed his eyes. The anger swarming around the man left, but a cold look appeared in his eyes when he looked at the grown, he then pulled his hat to cover his eyes. Yagari knew.

"And he's becoming increasingly suicidal," Yagari breathed out deeply as he looked at Kaien in the eye. He looked so tired, and he seemed done with this talk.

"My worst fear for Zero, is for him to be consume by his grief, his wants, or his regrets, or maybe all of them. It always worse, when something dies in a person while they are alive," Yagari took a drink that Kaien left out for him when he entered to the room. It became stale, as it was long forgotten, and his throat became horse from his yelling match.

"That's why," Kaien began while pouring another round of vodka for the two of them, "I want him to see his friend as much as he can. To find something, other than the sadness he is being consumed by for searching for reasons and hopes to keep him sane. Hopefully, he can see that human part of him, hasn't died and it can outlive that curse."

Yagari shook his head. "Curse, huh? Maybe that's why hope was at the bottom of Pandora's Box, it can be just as painful." Kaien moved the paper, but Yagari stopped him.

"Do you know the boy he's going to visit?"

"Honestly, no, all I know is he is not part of the Hunter Association." Nodding at him, Yagari let Kaien take the papers away, without looking back Kaien questioned him.

"Do you know him?"

At the moment a flash of a blue hair boy crying as he hugged Zero the day he was moving away from Seiyo flashed through him mind. It was the first time he met a friend of Zero, one that Ichiru didn't mind being with his brother, but from what he remembered he was crying as he was saying goodbye to two blonde children.

"Not personally. Meet the boy once, Zero kept saying how he'll miss Neko."

"Neko?"

"Yeah, that's what he'd called him. Saying he loves milk and fish, he told me how he liked tugging his ears because they were sensitive." he waved his hand dismissively.

"I'll have one agent watch Zero in case, he has an attack. The last thing I need, is him killing someone."

"Yagari..."

"You can't sugarcoat everything, Kaien," Yagari got up from his seat and pushed the box in place for Kaien, who was struggling to put it back. Kaien frowned at that statement.

"I can try,"

"You can't try forever."

Huffing, Kaien motioned him over to another cabinet, full of different type of beverages. Yagari grabbed some wine, and looked over at Kaien.

"How's the bloodsuckers going to deal with Zero's permission to leave to a city?"

"My guess, not good." Laughing Yagari threw two wine glasses at Kaien who caught it effortlessly. They looked at the window at two Day Class girls who were running away, crying. Zero appeared with a nasty scowl on his face, making Kaien chuckle.

Zero needs a break.

Yagari on the other hand frowned at the girls. They were going to get themselves killed one day, but what can he say about that?

"Well, those bloodsuckers deserve it. They are only here to obey to that bastard Pureblood, no doubt they would stir trouble in the cities, no doubt." Kaien took a sip of wine, frowning as it had an extremely bitter taste.

"Maybe." Going back to sit down at his destroyed desk, Kaien, frustrated, ran a hand through his hair.

"You want me to handle this with you?"

"Showing the Hunter Association's support?"

"Support? You want me to fake that?" Kaien pouted at that.

"I've done that for you!"

"For, Pete's sake! Fine, when is Zero going to visit his friend?" Kaien, disturbingly, switched to a happy mood and took out a calendar.

"Probably Saturday or Sunday." Kaien drank his wine happily, ignoring the taste when Yagari looked up at the ceiling. He won, this round.

"Remember Kaien, give a man a desire and he is victimized by it, but give a man an illusion and he's enslaved by it. Don't let Zero be consumed by the need to go back to those old happy days,"

Kaien was sure it was the wine, the bitter taste came back full force.

Zero wouldn't be consumed, he was sure of that.

"Just call him, what's the worse he could do?" Zero was going to tear his hair out. He has written to Neko for five years, when they were both 12, he hasn't talked to him in over five years. Actually, he hasn't talked to any of them at all.

"Be a bitch, and complain for ten hours of not taking to him? Wait, is this even still his number?" tired of mumbling to himself, Zero put in the damn numbers.

If no one answered, or it was disconnected, or not even his number anymore, he tried. Maybe then, Kaien will get off his back. He still needs to integrate him in how he found out about his letters to Neko, he was probably not going to like that answer.

"Hello?" It was a woman's voice, was it...

"Utau?"

"Who is this?" Wow, did she become unfriendly, well they haven't spoken since she was 10 years old.

"Zero Kiryu." Zero, heard a beeping sound on his end.

"Did she just hang up on me?" Putting the phone back on his ear, he heard the same beeping noise. She did! Redialing, the phone was picked up, quickly, this time.

"Zero-kun! Is it really you?" Maybe he should have called more often, she sounded like she was going to cry.

"Yeah, it's me. Can you put your brother on the phone? I have to talk to him."

"Sure!" He could hear, Utau shouting for her brother, and he walking around the house. He heard shouting and a violin playing, but then stopped abruptly.

Oh, he still plays that thing, wonder is he got better, Zero thought as he remembered Neko struggling to play the violin when he first got it. They were five or six if he remembered correctly, when Neko got his own violin.

"Hello?"

"Hey Neko, or do you like being call Ikuto, now?"

Clichés all around! Not. Trying to avoid the typical Ikuto going to Zero's school instead. Reason later explained, and yes I explained earlier that this might be considered AU. As not all the plot is followed.

Tell me how I did, I'm playing to continue this, but I'm working on another story, so it will be uploaded after I upload the other story I'm working on right now.

Review, please, having any questions I'll respond to it.