How Carolyn Met Buzz
It was a chilly, overcast spring day in Collinsport, Maine. At the only local hangout in town, the café at the Collinsport Inn, several teenagers were quietly enjoying ice-cream sundaes. One of these was a pale, thin young man with greasy black hair, which was slicked back. He wore thick, black-rimmed BC (birth control) glasses, a white short-sleeve button down shirt, neatly pressed black slacks, and a pair of plain black penny loafers. Beside him was stacked a large pile of textbooks & library books.
The young man was nervously attempting to eat his ice-cream but was having a terrible time of it, as each time he attempted to raise the spoon to his mouth, the ice-cream would plop back down into either the bowl or on top of the table. You see this young man was very shy and was afraid that everyone was watching him trying to eat, which of course they were, since they were enjoying with amusement, the show that Buzz was putting on while trying to consume his treat.
Behind the counter, 15-year old Maggie Evans looked pitifully at Buzz and lightly shook her head. She would have liked to have gone and spoken a few kind words to Buzz, and maybe slip him some extra napkins, but she new it would only embarrass him more and probably draw a few unwelcome comments from some of the other teenagers currently sitting at the tables. Maggie had started working at this café a little over a week ago, a few hours each day after school. She had to take this job in order to keep food on the table at home, since her mother had recently passed away and her father had become involved with a new love interest.
Maggie went about wiping the counter down but would every now and then glance up at another young man who usually came in each day and took a far table in the corner. He was tall, lean and fairly good looking. He ordered the same thing every afternoon, black coffee and a slice of pie. Maggie admired this young man because she knew that he came from a poor family and that every morning before school, he would go down and work on the fishing boats, helping to get them ready to go out on their morning fishing runs. In the afternoons, after he had finished his coffee & pie, he would often walk down to the cannery and sweep the floors to help earn money for his family.
Maggie admired this dedication in the young man and secretly she was in love with Joe Haskell. Joe was as faithful as an old dog. Good ole reliable Joe! One day maybe, one day.
The little bell over the door rang as it was opened and a beautiful, bright, giggly young woman by the name of Carolyn Stoddard bounced in. She was a cute little blond that had a slightly curving nose. She was normally friendly and outgoing, but could turn ugly on a dime. She was accompanied by two rather plain looking girlfriends. After all, a smart good looking girl would never be seen in the company of another attractive young lady. It was better to hang out with the ugly ducklings, so that one's beauty could stand out!
Carolyn selected a table near the center of the room, where everyone would be sure to see her. Maggie came over and took their orders. All eyes in the room were upon them, including Buzz's.
Joe put up his hand and said "Hi Carolyn". "Hi Joe", was her response. "Are you on the way down to the cannery?" asked Carolyn. "If so, please tell Bill Malloy that I said hello, will you?" she continued. Joe indicated that he would be glad to relay the message and went back to finishing his meager afternoon meal.
In the background, at one of the other tables, a very nervous young man was about to make an important decision. He had admired Carolyn for a long time and very much wanted to ask her out to a movie. Buzz knew that his family wasn't quite as well off as the people who lived in Collinwood, but he felt that if he studied hard and went on to college and became a Counselor or maybe even a Psychologist, that this might help overcome his current social status. All he wanted in life was for Carolyn to acknowledge his presence and maybe one day become his wife.
It was now or never, so Buzz mustered up the best courage he had and nervously approached the table where Carolyn and her two homely looking friends were sitting. He cleared his throat in order to get their attention. In a somewhat haughty voice, Carolyn asked "Yes, how may we help you?" Buzz asked in a rather nervous, shaking voice whether Carolyn might be interested in going to see a movie with him.
Carolyn just stared at Buzz for a moment, shared glances with both of her companions, returned her glare to Buzz, then snorted out with laughter. "Buzz off Buzz!", was her initial response. (Hence where Buzz originally got labeled with his nickname, from every girl he ever knew telling him to "Buzz off."
Buzz took a nervous step back, turned, then shambled towards his table. A broken man. He sat down at the table, cupped his face in his hands, and stared down into his half empty ice-cream dish.
From across the room he heard Carolyn tell her friends that she was ready to go. The three girls stood up, and with Carolyn in the lead, proceeded towards the door. As the little bell jingled again, signaling their departure, Carolyn stopped, turned, and with a cruel smile on her lips yelled across the room at Buzz "Call me when you grow up and become a man!" Then, just as she was about to leave, she noticed the old, rusting bicycle which Buzz rode. It was leaning against the wall outside. For good measure, Carolyn added the following insult, "And when you get some reliable transportation!" She and her two vulture-like companions cackled with laughter and were gone out the door.
Buzz looked as if he might start crying at any moment. Joe stood up, crossed the room, slapped him good naturedly on the back and flipped a nickel across the counter at Maggie. "Give this man an extra scoop of ice-cream on me", Joe responded amicably. Then, as Joe was leaving the café he stated, "I left you a big tip on the table Mags."
Maggie flashed Joe a brilliant smile, carried the scoop of ice-cream over to Buzz's table, then crossed over to Joe's table to claim her reward. Her smile faltered slightly as she retrieved the dime Joe had left and as she realized the joke. Old Mrs. Johnson never left more than a dime for a tip and that was the big joke around town.
Buzz took one look at the fresh scoop of ice-cream and realized that he wasn't hungry. He stood up and quickly departed the café before he started crying. He had left all of his books behind. He would never study again. He might even go ahead and drop out of school. He would somehow show that Carolyn Stoddard!
Buzz walked outside and was about to straddle his rusting hulk of a bicycle, when three bullies called to him from across the street. "Hey four eyes, give us all the money in your pocket and maybe we won't beat you up today!" yelled the larger of the three. They sauntered across the street toward Buzz, but they had picked the wrong day to mess with this particular person.
As the smaller of the three bullies stepped forward to harass him, all of Buzz's nervous tension and pent-up aggression was released and Buzz exploded into a fury of fists and profanity. A second boy started toward Buzz, but met with similar results.
The leader of the three bullies intervened and managed a truce. "Hey, you really know how to use your hands guy." "How about coming over to our side before you cut us all down like a buzz saw?" "But you will have to lose those granny glasses!"
So Buzz's life took a new turn and his cruel nickname took on a whole new meaning. He did drop out of school, and stopped frequenting the café. He had finally earned respect and found new friends. But he would always think about a life with the infinitely beautiful Carolyn Stoddard on the hill, a life that might have been.