Disclaimer : I do not own Final Fantasy, although... someday I shall! (yeah, right)
The Cids United
"This plan should work out perfectly..." A malevolent voice cackled. "Not even he can stop us now... Mwhahahahaa!!!"
Just as the unknown person finished laughing maniacally, a deep, dark voice bellowed through the room. "Are you just about finished?! Remember, we have plans!"
In the White House...
Out of nowhere, four men popped out of a warp-hole to find themselves in a HUGE hallway. Finally one of them spoke up, "where the $#%& are we?!" He wore rugged clothes and had greasy blonde hair that was kept out of his face by a pair of old worn-out goggles. Before any of the other men could answer, a man who had an uncanny resemblence to a monkey came down the hallway towards them.
"Glad to know yer here. I am George Dublya Bush, but you can just me Dublya," he said in an Texan accent. Two men stood at his side and were dressed in black suits with sunglasses.
Another of the men who popped out of the warp-hole spoke. "I would ask why we are here but I can't get up because I'm too damn fat," he said as he kept trying to shirft to one side to get on one of his sides to get up.
"You are in the White House. This is our 'hide-out'." Dublya said proudly.
"Uh... Sir?" One of men in black suits spoke up. "Everyone in America and probably the world know of this place, it's not exactally a hide-out."
As soon as that left the man's mouth, Dublya turned around angry. "Destory a man's right to dream, huh?!" Dublya then burst into tears.
"Can we please know why we're here?" This time the man didn't have any hair. "I would like to know also what happened to Spira." He stated rubbing his bald scalp.
"Ah yes, you are here to help me take down the evilest thing to plague our fair world..." Dublya said quietly.
"Sephiroth?" The one said lighting a cigarette.
"Cellulite?" The fattest one spoke up.
"That cross-dresser, Kuja?" The ooglop said jumping up and down.
"Sin?" The bald one said.
"No, it's far more worse than that... her name is... Hilary Duff." Dublya said before screaming after saying her name. "We're sending you right now to her location." They all gave him a weird look before they fell through a gap door in the floor.
Dublya then laughed. "Gets'em every time. It got those guys from 'Whose line is is Anyway' also."
Somewhere in Iraq...
"It puts de lotion on it's skin!!" A man in said into a deep, dark hole. "It does as it's told!!"
"Fine, you broken record, look, I'm putting it on and rubbing it in. If you don't mind, can I go back to Hogwarts?" Harry Potter said looking up at the man.
"No!" He said turning away from the hole. He then noticed another man there. "Ah, Darth Vader, it's nice to see you."
"Nice to see you, Arnold Schwarzenegger. We have them now. Mwhahhahahaahha!" Vader said coughing. "Duff wants us at a meeting soon. Hurry up and move it." Vader than turned on his heel and walked out of the room.
"You are lucky dis time Harry Potter, but soon you luck vill run out, but for the moment, I'll be back."
In the forests on the road to the hidden hide-out of Hilary Duff...
"Damn, I need cigarrettes..." Cid VII said faintly.
"I need lard..." Cid VIII said holding his 3 chins up.
"I need to find an antidote for this curse..." Cid IX said hopping behide most of them
"I need my....CHEESE ITS!!!" Cid X said crying.
These are the heros that will save us from Hilary Duff? Damn, our country is running low on helpful resources...
They finally snuck into the the 'hideout' of Hilary of Duff. It wasn't that hard to find either. There were signs along the whole road they were traveling giving them directions.
"This wasn't as hard as I thought it was going to be..." Cid IX said hopping gleefully. "We'll soon be able to get back to our own worlds soon. But I must say, it was a pleasure to meet you all!" he then noticed the other Cids just "hmed" at his comment, meaning they didn't really care.
"Once this is over, I'm going to stop smoking while I drink. This is one #$&%ed up dream," Cid VII said taking out his third cigarette today.
In the depths of darkness in Hilary Duff's Hide-out...
"Dublya sent the CIDS?!" A girl wearing black eyeliner yelled as her shrill voice echoed throughout the facility. She looked like she was trying to be goth, but somethings were a little off. "I can't believe this! First it was those empty Coca-Cola bottles, then those dudes from 'Whose line is it anyway?' and then THIS?!?! It's ridiculous!"
"Ve are sorry, Miss Duff, but ve didn't expect him to send THEM."
"Well, we'll have to wait for them to come to us. Cyhahahahahahaha!" Duff said as she began to sing 'Come Clean' and waited for her new nemisies to come.
Author's Notes: "I know, I know. Not that many FF characters in this chapter, but I promise more will appear in the following, along with guest appearances by other real-life people!! Always R&R!!!"