One
Loving can hurt
Loving can hurt sometimes
But it's the only thing that I know
When it gets hard
You know it can get hard sometimes
It is the only thing that makes us feel alive
She stared at the empty bottle in her hand. How had it come to this? 1,395 days of sobriety, thrown away in less than an hour. Amelia felt an overwhelming sense of emptiness. Guilt consumed her. Sadness, disappointment, and a whole range of other emotions threatened to rip her apart. But most of all, she couldn't shake off the terrible feeling of loneliness. Her dad was gone. So was Derek and Ryan. And she missed Owen, so, so much. She hadn't spoken to him in days. Rapid knocking on the door pulled her from her thoughts.
She swung open the door to find Owen standing there, a concerned look on his face.
"Amelia. You're drunk." He stepped inside and closed the door behind him, his face contorting with worry.
"You don't say."
"Why are you doing this to yourself? How could you throw away everything you've worked for these past few years? How could you do this to the people who care about you?"
"Derek's dead. There's no one left." She said softly, as if all the fight had long left her body.
"I'm still here. You're not alone, Amelia." He closed the distance between them, cradling her face in his hand.
For the first time since Derek died, she broke down, her body wracked with sobs. And for the first time since Derek died, she felt like she would be able to get through it. With Owen, she felt like she could actually survive.
Two
We keep this love in a photograph
We made these memories for ourselves
Where our eyes are never closing
Hearts are never broken
Times forever frozen still
She stared at the ring on her finger. He'd proposed to her a week ago, yet she still wasn't able to wrap her head around it. She was getting married to the man she loved. She was getting married to Owen.
"Having second thoughts?" She felt his strong arms wrap around her waist, his breath tickling the back of her neck. She hadn't even noticed when he'd entered the kitchen.
"Yeah, you know that hot new intern at the hospital? He asked me out today," Amelia's eyes sparkled with mischief as she turned to look at her fiancé.
"Is that so? What did you tell him?" His eyebrows creased together, and his grip around her waist tightened ever so slightly.
"I told him that he should check with the head of trauma before asking me out. Wouldn't want him ending up as a patient in the ER do we?" A faint smile tugged at the corner of her lips, and she turned back to attend to the food simmering on the stove.
"Well in that case," Owen whispered by her ear, sending tingles down her spine. His hands moved down south from her waist as he peppered kisses on her neck.
"Owen… Stop! Im trying to make dinner here, your mom's gonna be here in an hour!" She fought the urge to turn around and kiss the man senseless, but lost her last shred of control as his hand slipped beneath the waistband of her jeans.
"Screw it, we're ordering take-out."
Three
So you can keep me
Inside the pocket
Of your ripped jeans
Holdin' me closer
'Til our eyes meet
You won't ever be alone
Wait for me to come home
She stared at the pink plus sign on the stick. She couldn't believe this was happening. Not right now. Owen had just signed on to go on another tour of duty. He was leaving in a week. She couldn't do this, not by herself. She thought of Ryan's lifeless body in that hotel room, of her unicorn baby lying motionless in her arms. She couldn't go through that again; she wasn't sure if she'd survive.
He found her sitting at the edge of the tub, staring blankly into space. He could tell something was wrong — he always could, with her.
"Amelia? What's wrong? Did something happen?" He asked softly, kneeling beside her.
Her face was blank as she turned to look at him, but he could sense that she was nervous — scared, even. She picked up something beside her and handed it to him. Owen sucked in a deep breath.
"You're…?" He was speechless, part of him wanted to scream from the rooftops and announce that he was going to be a father, but the rational part of him didn't know how Amelia would react. Amelia nodded slowly, meeting his eyes for the first time that day.
"I want us to be happy about this, I really do. But you're leaving in a week and I keep thinking about my unicorn baby and what if there's something wrong with our baby and I don't know if I can do this," Amelia rambled on, her voice breaking a little as tears threatened to spill from her eyes.
"Come here," Owen pulled her against his chest, softly kissing the top of her head. He hated to see her cry. Her eyes were too beautiful for them to be stained with tears.
"I'm scared, Owen," She sobbed quietly into his chest,
"Hey, we'll work this out, we always do." Owen ran a hand through her dark curls, pressing a kiss to her temple. "Everything's gonna be alright."
That night, she lay in his arms and traced patterns across his chest, listening to his steady heartbeat.
"Promise me you'll come home safely," she whispered softly.
"I promise."
Four
Loving can heal
Loving can mend your soul
And it's the only thing that I know (know)
I swear it will get easier
Remember that with every piece of ya
And it's the only thing we take with us when we die
She stared at the picture of the ultrasound and rested her palm over her protruding stomach as she settled onto the couch in the living' room. Owen would be back in a week, and she could barely wait. The shrill ringing of the doorbell pulled her from her thoughts, as she sighed and pushed herself up from the couch, picture still clutched tightly in her hand.
She opened the front door, only to find two men clad in Class A military uniform, both bearing solemn looks on their faces. No. This couldn't be happening. She felt the picture slip from her hand, but she couldn't bring herself to tear her eyes from the men standing before her.
"Are you Major Owen Hunt's wife?"
"Yes," Her voice trembled as she spoke.
"The Secretary of the Army regrets to inform you that your husband was killed in action yesterday in Iraq. There is an ongoing investigation. Once the investigation is complete, you will have full access to the report. We're sorry for your loss."
Amelia's head spun, and she swayed slightly, grabbing onto the door frame for support. No. He was lying. Owen couldn't be dead. They must have made a mistake. Maybe someone else with the same name as him. Maybe it was just a mix-up. He couldn't be dead. He was coming home in a week.
He promised.
Five
We keep this love in this photograph
We made these memories for ourselves
Where our eyes are never closing
Our hearts were never broken
Time's forever frozen still
She stared at the drawing in her hand, a tear escaping from the corner of her eye.
"Momma, do you like it?" Her seven-year-old son tugged on her hand, pointing at the people in the drawing. "That's me, and that's you beside me, and that's daddy over there. Now we have a full photo of the three of us!" He beamed proudly at her.
He bore so many similarities to his father, with his ginger hair and blue eyes, and his positive attitude towards everything. After Owen's passing, she had wanted to throw in the towel, to give up on life. But once she laid eyes on him, her perfect little boy, she knew she wasn't alone. After Owen, she thought she'd never be able to love again. She was wrong.
"So, do you like it?" He asked again, eyes sparkling with anticipation.
"I love it, Owen. It's perfect."
-End-