It's been a dozen years.
Lisbon still doesn't understand herself. Doesn't get what's going on between us.
It's about power.
She doesn't want power. She wants someone else to have it over her.
But can't deal with the idea that being dominated turns her on. Won't even let the notion cross her brain. Politically incorrect.
Hence our dozen year dance. With Lisbon always the seeker.
Her becoming a cop was a reaction formation. She chose to wield power over people professionally because it's the one thing that terrifies her personally.
But I could always tell she wants to be overcome, wants to surrender, but can't admit it.
How many nice boyfriends will Lisbon go through before she throws herself into my arms?
I'm betting Pike will do the trick.
He's so wholesome and attentive and eager and needy. Like Greg.
Lisbon doesn't like needy.
Doesn't respect it.
Mashburn pursued her and couldn't hold her interest.
Even in my reduced state, years ago, crawling into the CBI, desperate for help with Red John, I could see it.
I could see that she was out of her depth with me. I was exactly what she'd been waiting for all her life.
I could read every flicker in her eyes. She has a thousand tells. Most of them about sex.
And the body never lies. Well, maybe mine can but I've had a lot of practice.
At the time, I thought she'd be useful. Having the agent in charge of the Red John case madly in love with me would come in handy.
But I grew to love her. Took a few years but it happened.
I don't share her pecadillos. Don't need to dominate or to be dominated.
I just want to be what Lisbon wants.
And if that's that mean, cold-hearted guy she always worshiped from afar but never talked to, so be it.
I wonder if she can even reach an orgasm with Pike?
Probably has to think about me.
The dynamic isn't there for her with him.
She wants to be ravished by a superior man who can take her or leave her.
So what happens to us the morning after the night she finally slips into my bed in the Airstream?
When she goes on record as wanting me and I go on record as responding?
How will we preserve the delicate balance?
She'll wake up.
I will have made sure to be a bit of a brute the night before.
Surprising her with my perfect selfishness.
Completely taking over the show. Taking her. And giving her what I want to give her when I want to give it to her.
She'll be thrilled and sated and a little embarrassed.
Then what?