Disclaimer: I don't own Remus and Sirius... (sobbing bitterly)... they are copyrighted by J.K. Rowling... I just playing with them... (smirking vigorously)

Meet me again in Remus and Sirius pairing (in presenter tone)! Damn! They're so cute being together... Btw, I will make this story with Sirius' POV. And... this isn't the sequel of Ten Things I Love About You. Sorry... I haven't begun that story yet (giving lame excuses, blah blah blah). Anyway, enjoy!

What Are These Feelings Called, chapter 1

By green-mermaid

I entered the Gryffindor common room and slammed my book on the table near the fireplace. James looked up from his Charms homeworks and frowned at me. I sat down quickly, 90 degrees from his seat. Peter, who sat across James, was looking at me fearfully. I was sure that he shifted his seat away from me. James kept looking at me without saying anything. He shrugged as he looked the boy who now entering our common room.

"Quarreling with Remus again?" James seemed didn't concern at my fight with Remus since he continuing his Charms (which due tomorrow). He asked me in lazy tone, inserting his feather into his quill.

I put a grumpy look to him and opened the Inscrutable Magical Creatures, a book which 3 inches thick, in random page. I tried to concentrate on sentences on that damn book and ended up re-read it for 10 times but no result. I didn't understand this at all! This was just the same as its name, inscrutable.

I glowered at the boy that just now entered the common room and now chatting happily with the redhead Lily Evans. I looked at him cynically though he seemed didn't feel it at all. I turned back to this shit book, muttering under my breath.

After a few seconds, he went upstairs to our dorm and Lily went out from that portrait hole. I decided to stop reading and spill everything to my best friend.

"He's really annoying, son of bitch, and a scum! Bloody hell!" I hit the thick book and ended up hurting my right hand (okay... that really stupid of me).

James looked up from his book again and Peter was frozen at my chosen words. Who cares!

"Okay... those are not quite good words to say," James released his round eyeglasses, resting his eyes from his askew glasses.

Peter continued scribbling something on his parchment. I didn't know whether he was writing something or scribbling. His handwriting was worst.

"What had he done this time? I mean... what had you done again this time?" He corrected his sentence, accusing me in the guilty one shoes.

"Why do you always judge him as the victim and me as the one who rough him up?"

"Because it always likes that," He smiled innocently. "Oh... C'mon. I don't have much time hearing your oh-I-hate-that-boy story again," He was spinning Peter's pen gleefully.

He loved spinning the pen as he never looked something that round and could be used to write (it's a Muggle-thing. Did you know some interesting information about pen? Give it to James and he would kiss you for sure).

"It's just that I hate him and you know... I did another prank on him, ended up with I should pair up with him for Care for Magical Creatures. And he threw some killing glares on me coz I kept flirting with girls. And finally our work didn't finish because of his slow motion hand and the teacher gave us 10 pages assignment! And he gave me this incrustrable book to read! And I shall meet him at 8 this evening in library! Merlin's beard. Did I speak without taking a breath?" I panted heavily as if I had been running for 50 km.

"Uh-huh... wonderful ability I should say," James commented simply and gawked at me. "Anyway, I pity Remus for having you as his partner," He patted me on my back slightly.

"Didn't you pity on me?" I glared at him.

"Nope. Not at all. And by the way, you spelled inscrutable with incrustrable," James put his glasses again; signing his time for my sharing-unhappy-moments was up.

"And you said 'and' word four times in row," Peter added slowly.

I rolled my eyeballs and slammed closed the book again. "You're not helping at all, you know that?"

I stormed outside the portrait hole, grumbling. James and Peter shrugged their shoulder and turned back to their works. Damn! Actually, I was waiting for them for saying sorry!

I sighed. It was still fresh in my mind when I first arrived in platform nine and three-quarters, when I first saw that amber boy on the first time, and when I first disliked him for sure.

I would never forget that time since I couldn't control my feelings. I looked up to a scarlet steam engine which puffing smoke over a platform packed with witches and wizards seeing their children onto the train.

I examined my surroundings, adapting my senses to the bustling air. My (noisy) auntie was calling me but I pretended not hearing her at all due to the lively noises. I had been dreaming to go out from that uncomfortable mansion of mine. I hate all Black family members. They were annoying, evil, sly, deceitful, well... some weren't though. I've promised to myself that I wouldn't sly as them and that's why I didn't want to be a Slytherin. I must not be the Slytherin.

A glimpse of black and messy hair passed me. And there, I saw a boy around my age with his (very likely) father and mother. He complained to his parents about how he already could take care of himself. I bet that he's pure-blood since he was like me. I mean... everything in our mansion was already served by our house-elves and I became a nasty spoilt boy (yes... I conceded it myself!). Though, I often wanted to be claimed as a fully developed person (and it wasn't at all). I observed the boy more. His parents insisted that they would keep him company till the train ran to the school. He rolled his eyes and said a quick 'good-bye' before stepping onto the Hogwarts Express.

Then I saw a scare cat boy who also around my age (though his face looked alike rat). I watched his clumsiness with his frog. A prefect asked him about his ticket but seemed like he heard it: cricket, racket, trinket, and many other unusual things. The prefect lost his patience and finally left him with his confound. After the prefect left him, his parents (who also looked alike rat) came and gave him crackers. He suddenly shouted: "Oh! He meant the ticket!" His parents exchanged looks and I shrugged my shoulder. A unique one...

And I was about to hop into the scarlet train when a glimpse of golden shone not far away from my step. I didn't continue forward to the train. Instead, I stood still, curious about the owner of that golden hair. After two prefects walked away, I could see the owner's hair completely. His face was cute actually and seemed like he was going by himself since I didn't see any people around him and he was absorbed by a book he was reading. I eyed him more and I realized that his skin was so white and beautiful. Nope... he wasn't handsome for me, but beautiful. More beautiful than girls I had known.

My auntie had lost her patience towards me now and was screaming at me. She shouted as if I was at the outer space. I sighed and came towards her. She was very angry to me, but being a stubborn boy I was, I ignored her completely and stepped onto the train, humming an I-created-my-own-song.

She was yelling non-stop though I was already on the train. Maybe I should bring her to psychiatrist to check her brain whether she was insane or not (I hope she was insane! I'm very sure about that... ). I mean... she knew that she was really only wasting her time and energy yelling at unimportant things.

I sighed and began to search for a compartment. I could see my cousin, Patricia Parkinson, got along well to a (looks like) deceitful girl on the left compartment. I shook my head and walked to the right, avoiding her. I opened almost all the compartment but was full.

Okay... now I regretted ignoring that blabbermouth auntie.

I sighed and opened another compartment. And I saw the black and messy hair boy before. He sat together with the rat-liked face boy. Across them, I could see the modest and simple boy with golden hair before. Next to him was empty seat and I entered the compartment.

"Can I sit here? All compartment is full already," I grinned.

"Sure!" The black-haired boy replied me gleefully as if he had known me for such a long time.

"Ye... Yes... Of... Of course," The rat-liked face boy added though it's too late since I had hopped to the fluffy seat (which was soft like sofa!).

The boy next to me didn't reply me at all. He kept reading his book as if it was the most important and interesting in the world.

I shrugged my shoulder. I wasn't really going well with book-worm boy type. And I really thought that I would never be and want to be his friend. Never! I mean... that type never knew fun at all. All he knew was book, book, and book. Boring.

I looked up and grinned. The black haired boy also grinned back and then we said at the same time our name.

"Sirius Black,"

"James Potter"

It was really at the same time that we finally didn't hear each other name. We laughed and he gave his hand, asking for shaking hand with me. I grabbed his hand, grinned.

"James Potter. Nice to meet you,"

"Hi! Sirius Black. Looks like we're going to get along well,"

I could see the rat-liked face boy looked up and eyed my hand and James' hand, looking adorably as if he wanted badly to enter our newly-born friendship. James seemed to notice it and smiled to him.

"What's your name?"

"Pet... Petti...Pettigrew. I'm Peter Pettigrew," he said in stutter. His face showed a disbelieving look to James, maybe he didn't think that James would greet him.

He looked a bit cheerful now. James smiled and shook his hand.

"Nice to meet you! Hope we can get along well,"

I looked to the amber eyes boy who sat next to me. I didn't know whether he ignored our warming-welcome-to-each-other or he didn't hear us since the book absorbed his attention too much. But, didn't he know that he was the only one who hadn't spoken up yet?

I sighed. I really didn't like speaking to a guy like him, but... worth to try, right? I mean... first impression sometimes wrong. So, I greeted him.

"Sirius Black. And you?"

He sighed and faced me. Wow! He got a beautiful amber eyes and his hair ran smoothly along with the wind when he raised his head.

He looked at me sharply and put his serious face. "I know your name already since you'd said it three times so you don't need to say it more. Besides, is this warming welcome really important? I don't think so, Sirius Black"

He closed his book and walked out from our compartment. From the compartment glass window, I could see that he was buying some snacks from a woman that walked along the corridor just now.

I was speechless and stunned. I didn't move from my pose and my neurons seemed stopped moving at once. My brain could process what he had said to me. I mean... I didn't expect him to be that rude! And James chortled at that time and took three minutes to get him back (he still chuckling a little).

He didn't need to be that rude! I believe I'd hated him from that time for sure!

I inserted my mashed potato harshly to my mouth and made James' attention turned to me.

"Woah... easy, boy! It's not the end of the world yet. Hello?" James cocked his eyebrow.

I ignored him, still eating my dinnerwith mad. Like the Great Hall which buzzed with student's voice, in my brain buzzing Remus' death sentence to me this noon. It's not that frightening. Sirius Black didn't have word "scare" in his dictionary. But, what made me scared (and also angry) was his expressionless face when his mouth throwing tantrum at me. I never knew that there's somebody who had that calm yet angry face.

I put down my spoon and fork and grabbed the thick book Remus gave me this noon. "I'm finished. See you later!"

"Wait! Where are you going?"

Okay, I knew that James would ask me that question because that's not my ritual to grab book after dinner. That's no so me! So, I'd prepared the answer for him. "Date with Remus in library!"

James choked his Pumpkin Juice and cocked his eyebrow. "WHAT!"

Oopps... the effect was far than I expected.

Somehow, I didn't really feel that bad stepping to the library. Usually, I should drag my feet (since it somehow gained too much weight if I went to the library). When I peeked inside the silent and empty library, I easily found the golden haired boy. I was about to enter and walked towards him when I saw another boy sat in front of him.

And I saw Remus was laughing with that boy. Somehow a ton of steel fell into my lung and made me felt displeased seeing the view. I kept glaring at the boy which I couldn't see his face since he was backing me. Remus looked very enjoy chatting with him. He laughing many times and blushing even more.

There was a moment when they stopped chatting and Remus' laugh gradually quiet down because the boy looked intensely at Remus for a long time. He placed his hand in Remus cheek and trailed it to Remus' neck bone, feeling Remus' soft and white skin.

The boy leaned on Remus and it was only two inches away between him and Remus' lips. Okay... did I choke something in my throat when I had my dinner? Because I felt something on my throat. And it removed a bit when suddenly Remus blocked his lips with his palm, blushing furiously.

"Ahh... Don't misunderstand, Jerry. I... I... Black will come soon and I don't want him to misunderstand between you and me,"

I could hear Remus was stuttering in his word. I mean... he always calmed and looked like he already typed everything he needed to say in his brain. So, looking him stuttering was another new discovery for me about him. How many new discoveries I could have if I getting along with him? I was very curious about him now.

The boy named Jerry sat back and laid his head back. He crossed his hands, covering his eyes which now shut. Remus shifted uncomfortably in his seat.

"How long?"

"Pardon?"

"How long should I wait more, Rem? How long till you forgive me, Rem?" His voice increased. Remus seemed quivered in his seat.

"Je..."

"What? How dare you say another boy's name when there are only two of us here! Black will not come! He isn't a type that will fulfill his promises! Even though he came, let him know about us! What am I for you, Remus? Only eternally-friend!"

I couldn't control displeasing feeling I had in my heart. It felt like something had stuck in my heart nerves because my blood circulation had problems now, somehow. I should ask Madam Pomfrey whether I had some illness.

Oops, back to them again. Remus seemed lost his words. He looked away from Jerry's eyes. This was also new thing. Remus never looked away from his talking partner, especially when he was glaring at me sharply.

I walked towards them silently, feeling I had to save him from his losing words (though I wanted to see his face when he was losing words).

"Well... sorry that I'm not a type that will fulfill my promise," I slammed the thick book between them.

Both of them looked at me. Now, I could clearly the person who tortured my mouth-fighting enemy. I was more handsome than him. I was more attractive than him. I was more than him in every aspect! Why this damn Remus like him so much? He showed his happy face to this ugly boy but showing his upset face in front of me. Where did I do wrong?

"Black..." Remus' face showed his disbelieving.

"Did I disturb you two? Well, sorry about that. Let's get ready to our assignment, shall we, Lupin?"

Did I smile stiffly just now? Shit!

"Why..."

"If you please allow me to sit in your seat, Mr..." I ignored the amber eyes boy.

"Jerry Mackenzie. Black, please..." Remus answered me.

"Well, Mr Mackenzie, please get out. You don't want him to disturb us, do you, Remus?"

Jerry scoffed at me and stood up. Okay... he had the same height with me and now he was glaring me. His sapphire eyes shot my grey eyes. "Why must you come now, Black?"

I glared him back. "You don't like my presence?"

"Absolutely not. What are you planning in your mind? Disturbing us like this. Did you eavesdrop on our conversation?"

"What I see was you two weren't having a conversation," I stared at them blankly.

Crap! Stupid mouth of mine!

I could see that Remus' face was in crimson now and I hate seeing that. Dunno why. At time like this, I usually liked torturing him and laughed at his crimson face. The face which he never gave it to me before. So, this guy was his weakness, eh? Quite disappointing.

"Black, please... this night,..." Remus paused for a second, taking his breath deeply. "I cancel our meeting tonight. I mean... let me doing this assignment since I'm the one who is irresponsible," He took the thick book and placed it in his hand well.

"What!" I looked at him incredulously.

"Let me be with him, okay? This is a problem between him and me. Don't enter this problem and make it more complicated than it seems to be," Remus pushed me to the library door.

"He had done something you didn't want before!" I pointed at Jerry.

Jerry let out another scoff from his damn ugly face. "Don't interfere anyone's problem, do you know, Black? Doesn't your mother teach you that? You don't even know Remus' feelings or mine so you had no right to talk in here,"

Strike! My mother never taught me anything...

"Black, please get out, please?" Remus begged me. The steel that had been removed from my limp now came back again and hurting me even more.

"But,..."

"I love him!" Remus yelled. He took a deep breath before continued his sentence calmly. "I love him. So, please, give us a room". He clenched my cloak and bowed his head on me, begging to me which I thought he wouldn't do it even though the world stopped rotating.

Wait! Did he say something important just now, about his feeling? I turned my head 90 degree to him. My eyes showed my bewilderment, my throat choked, my tongue seemed lost its senses, and my lung couldn't pump the oxygen through my body.

And the most of all, I felt my heart broken, or did I really have some heart attack illness since I got many attacks tonight? Or was it because of this amber eyes boy?

- TBC -

Yep! That's for today... many complications next! XD anyway, hope you love it! Review! Review! Review!