It all started with Anatomy and now it's come to this!
Is this even funny?
Disclaimer: DNON
"I'm not touching that," Sasuke muttered crossing his arms in front of him. He stood there with a raised eyebrow expecting her to do all the work. Who did he think he was? Not that she expected anything different from His Highness.
Sakura muttered a string of curse words under her breath, "Fuck shit, bastard, lazy ass, turd cake, dick head, good for nothing chicken ass."
His supreme hearing caught the profanities and he pounced on the opportunity to make her squirm.
Looking up to make sure the TA wasn't watching, he reached out to smack her ass playfully, grinning when he heard her breath hitch. "I'm a business major and besides," he moved directly behind her and whispered, "You're hot when you're angry." His tongue lightly traced the shell of her ear before he licked the exposed region of her neck sending shivers down her spine.
Sakura froze, scalpel in hand and took a deep breath to cool her nerves and hissed, "Uchiha Sasuke, if you value your contribution to baby making, I suggest you step back or else I will not be held responsible when this scalpel accidentally slips out of my hand and cuts off your most prized possession."
She dropped the scalpel on the table and suppressed a yelp when he suddenly spun her around. He pulled her close and sniffed her neck audibly, "You're wearing the perfume I bought for you," he stated approvingly.
Out of fear of getting kicked out of the lab, she searched for the TA's whereabouts before grabbing his chin and forcing him to look at her. To her dismay, he placed two fingers over her lips effectively keeping her mouth from opening and his other hand caught the stray string off her sweater and pulled it up to her eyes before breaking it off, "You're quite the minx," he hissed out the final sound with a small smirk.
"I am not amused." The smell of formaldehyde nauseated her and she just wanted to get the dissecting out of the way. There was no time to joke around and the one time she needed Sasuke to be serious, he decided to fuck with her.
"Sakurrrra," he purred, "lighten up."
She shoved him away from her and growled, "Why did bother taking this class if you're only going to distract me?" It was true that Anatomy Lab was not a class required for the business major but he only took the class to make sure she stayed focused...and it was fun to tease her from time to time.
"Haruno, Uchiha, why have you not started dissecting? Do I need to team you up with Lee! He's already a quarter done!"
The two students flinched and glanced over at the kid wearing green spandex. Rock Lee looked up, forceps already tainted by residue in hand, and caught her staring. He blushed and muttered quite loudly about youthful cherry blossoms during the springtime of youth.
Freaked out, Sakura immediately opened her mouth to come up with a spectacular lie, "Gomen, Sensai! I was just- We were just- He was just," for the first time in months, she couldn't, for the life of her think of a proper lie. Absolutely mortified in that moment, the only thing she could process in her mind was, "Don't pair me up with Lee. Don't pair me up with Lee. Do not pair me up with Lee."
"We were just going over the procedures in depth to maximize our learning experience," Sasuke lied smoothly. In an attempt to fluster the TA who happened to be attracted to him, he ran his fingers through his hair and increased the intensity of his stare.
"Oh," blushing and evidently uncomfortable the TA muttered, "Well then, hurry up." The TA then moved towards another group of unproductive workers. The next group approached was a group of giggly girls. The TA sighed heavily and took a moment to curse her job before dealing with the prisses.
Sometimes having an incredibly sexy boyfriend was a good thing, but right now, he was distracting. "Sasuke-kun, are you seriously not going to help me?"
He shot her a look of disgust before saying, "Yep. That cat is all yours."
"Such a pussy."
Chuckling, he handed her a set of latex gloves and an apron, "While I'm glad your humor has finally made its entrance, but you and I both know the only reason I'm here is to make sure you don't fail this class. So go on. Cut it open. Think of it as practice for the future Dr. Sakura."
Thinking of the future did make her smile. Dr. Uchiha Sakura. She liked the sound of that, not that she would say that out loud.
She lifted the animal by it's foot and placed it ventral side up. "Ugh. This is disgusting."
Sasuke ignored this and merely said, "Now make your first cut."
"Don't rush me!"
"Think of it as us having sex," he whispered thoughtfully making sure only she could hear.
She turned her face to him, "What are you talking about? How can you possibly think cutting open a dead cat is anything like having sex?" She whispered the last word out.
She heard him slip on a pair of latex gloves and watched him move behind her. His hand covered the hand holding the scissors and he directed it over the cat's midline. Gently he led her hand to make the first incision to remove the skin, "This is like me unbuttoning your shirt."
"Sasuke-kun! This is nothing like that!"
"Shh. Trust me, I know what I'm doing."
She watched him drop the scissors and pick up the forceps to pull the skin apart. He pinned the skin down on either side and said, "Now imagine you're trapped underneath my arms."
He took a hold of the scalpel and cut into the muscle, "My hands have just unhooked your bra and now you're chest is completely visible to me."
Despite their current situation, she felt her nipples pucker sweetly against her shirt. "This is so wrong," she moaned.
"You're relaxing, aren't you?"
The smell wasn't as nauseating anymore and being pressed up against Sasuke wasn't too terrible she supposed. He slipped the scalpel into her hand and told her to expose the organs. He heard the sounds of approaching footsteps so he moved directly next to her pretending to read the lab book.
Once the footsteps faded into the chatter of the class, he sidled up closer to Sakura and watched her feel the organs with the tips of her fingers. "Hmm. Perfect," he commented, "exactly how I would rub your nipples. Except, you would be writhing in pleasure instead of being you know," he gestured towards the cat, "dead."
"Sasuke, that's a turn off," Sakura replied dryly labeling the pancreas with a pin.
He let out a low chuckle and instantly she was reminded of the activities they engaged in during the darkness of the night. It was a chuckle that promised lots and lots of pleasure.
"Maybe, you'd like to work your hands on me."
Sakura had to suppress a groan, "Sasuke-kun, you can stop now, I'm relaxed now."
"No, this is fun."
Sakura was torn in two. He was so distracting but his dirty talking was kind of hot...and it didn't exactly stop her from doing her work.
"I haven't even began to tell you how I would fuck you."
She dropped the forceps at his sudden directness, "Sasuke! What am I going to do with you!"
The thought of being caught must have excited him because he was behind her once again, "The real question is," his hand slipped beneath her apron to her rest on her chest, "what am I going to do with you?"
"Sasuke-kun! I have had enough of your 'Anatomy' lessons," she said loudly and spun around accidentally knocking over a glass flask containing hydrochloric acid. She froze at the sound of breaking glass and a sudden hiss.
The class grew quiet and both Sasuke and Sakura turned around to look at the source of the noise.
"Oh no," Sakura moaned, "this cannot be happening!"
The TA hurried over and looked stumped at the situation. After a moment of silence, she said, "Uh. You will have to do a make up lab so just, well, clean yourselves up and leave. And I'll dispose of this mess I guess."
Never had the class seen two people clean and leave so fast.
Totally sober about the entire situation, they entered the hallway in silence. After walking for about a minute Sasuke decided to break the quiet, "You so did that on purpose."
As if she knew he was going to accuse her, she said, "No, I didn't!" almost before he had finished his statement.
He shrugged unbelievingly, "Well, I guess this means we can continue my Anatomy lessons," he stopped in front of her and turned around with a challenging look in his eyes, "unless you've still 'had enough?'"
She looked to the left and back at Sasuke. Before he could taunt her some more, she pulled him into the empty classroom and locked the door shut, "Make good on your lesson Uchiha."
So, Sakura's had Sasuke's help in lecture and lab. I suppose he's effective in getting what he wants!
I hope it was more humorous than repulsive? I definitely questioned it.
Review?