I feel like even though Olivia is always hurt more by Fitz and she seems to be so much more affected by him, it's always him telling her he loves her and trying to win her back. I don't know, just seemed interesting to me that he's always trying more, but she's really the one affected by it. Anyway, that's just me going on one of my little rants. Not one of the best things I've written, but I finished the multiple choice on my AP exam today really early, so I just decided to write this. Sorry to whomever has to read my booklet, they will probably cringe at the pure melodrama. I didn't really feel like editing it or even revising any parts which don't make sense, but I figured I would post it anyway. IT'S ALMOST THURSDAY!
"I know you're angry Livi, but you left me."
"Yeah I left you. We've been over this before."
They were screaming by now, moving closer together with each angry word.
"You left. I don't need to explain myself to you. You weren't there, so I went somewhere else."
He had stopped yelling and stopped moving. This only seemed to anger Olivia more as she turned around and resumed the shouting.
"You are really unbelievable, you know that. You really want to act like you has nowhere else to go but to Amanda. What about you wife? Why didn't you, I don't know, go to her?"
"You know how things are between Mellie and me. I love you."
He remained calm and continued advancing towards her as she stepped away from him.
"What we had was a mistake Fitz."
His name had slipped in her statement out of nowhere. That was all the invitation he needed. He moved closer so their bodies were touching.
"Was it really a mistake Livi?" He whispered in her ear. She could feel herself growing weaker, everything in her wanted to give in. But she wouldn't. She wasn't that person anymore. Or at least that's what she told herself.
"You have to stop doing this to me. Get off of me and don't you dare touch me again. This isn't what I wanted. This is never what I wanted." She shrieked, holding back tears. But he wouldn't back away and he wouldn't let go. And his anger began to flare back up.
"Oh really, you never wanted this? This relationship was just forced upon you?"
Olivia just stared coldly.
"Because I seem to recall a lot of begging on your part, a lot of screaming my name, a lot of declarations of love. You were always willing to go a step further and you were more than willing to start this thing. You had every opportunity to stop it if you were oh so miserable with me. You're the one who wouldn't go to your own room that night. Don't tell me you never wanted this as much as I did. For once just say something real to me instead of worrying how someone will spin it."
He was spewing venom with his words, sneering, screaming and angry, hitting her heart with every chance he found. He knew exactly how to hurt her most. After over twenty years with Mellie, it was his default move to attack someone he loved with their own words and actions. When things were bad between them, Mellie did it to him all of the time.
"Fine. I fell in love with you the second I saw you. Is that what you want to hear? That I get once glimpse of you there isn't anything I wouldn't do for a taste or a touch. That all I want is to hear your voice in my ear, telling me you love me, even though I know you don't mean it. That I would be willing to put myself right back where I when I left just to be with you. That you make me weak and powerless. That I can't even think of being with anyone else because you're all I think about. That I would give you anything you asked for even though I know you would just toss me aside again. That I don't care if I mean nothing to you, and I would still do whatever you wanted. That I'll forever be stuck as your mistress while you screw around with aides and I don't even care because I love you that much. Is that what you want to hear?" Olivia cried, finally breaking down and breaking away.
She had turned around as the tears ran down her face. Slowly, he came up behind her and whispered in her ear.
"I love you."
He turned her around and kissed the first spot where a tear had fallen. He quietly repeated the three words, each time lightly kissing each spot where her tears had fallen. This only made her cry more. But he continued on. And finally, her tears had stopped. He then lightly kissed her lips.
"I love you Livi. And I won't stop saying it until you believe me."
And then he began to kiss her again, moving from her lips down to her neck, while his hands crawled up her shirt and over her stomach. At his first touch she flinched. She hadn't been with anyone since she left Fitz more than a year ago and the contact startled her. But soon they were completely wrapped up in each other, unable to make it to the bedroom before settling for the couch. It didn't take them long to fall back into their familiar rhythm. They quickly discarded each others' clothes and let the desire that had built up over the time they had been apart take control.
Covered in sweat, they both took a moment to catch their breaths.
Finally, when their heart rates had finally dropped, he whispered again to Olivia as he desperately tried to find her eyes:
"I love you. Do you believe it now Livi?"
"I don't know. I really don't know." She said, not looking up and avoiding his eyes as she wiggled out from under him.
"And even if I did, Mr. President," she continued, finally gaining the courage to look into his eyes, "I don't know if it would be enough anymore."
The look on his face revealed just how much the words had wounded him. She knew exactly how to hurt him too.