Hey, peeps! *winks* Yes, yes, it's me, Chad Dylan Cooper. Hold your applause, please. I want to get this over with as quickly as I can. I don't like talking about weakness. I know what you're thinking: Chad has weaknesses? Impossible! He is The Greatest Actor of Our Generation! Chad is cool. Chad is mysterious. Chad plays by his own rules. While all of that remains true and always will, I need to vent this out to all of you, my loyal and creepily obsessed fans.

I have heard of the recent 'Channy' trend, and according to my agent and publicist, it will help my fan base if I elaborate on it - oh… I mean, from the depths of my heart I feel like I owe this explanation to all of you. Yeah.

I'm sure since all of you are creepily obsessed with my girlfriend and I, you will be happy to hear this explanation of my thoughts about Sonny. I'm sure you have guessed my thoughts, and most of you probably got them right, but like I said, I *clears throat* owe this to every single one of my devoted, Chad-tastic fans.

I know that by now most of you have figured out that Sonny is a little different than all of my past girlfriends. For one, I actually have feelings for her and it's not just because of looks or fame that I'm dating her. I do it because, well, it makes me happy. Yeah, yeah, she's my Shortstack, you all know the story. I'll come back to this later, though. Let's start from the, well, start.

My thoughts when I first saw her in that fat suit: another fan. Except this one was in a fat waitress's costume. I assumed after she explained that she didn't work at the cafeteria that she was on a show here at the studio; which one I wasn't sure of and didn't particularly care. If I had taken the effort to think it through, I should have known that there was only one show that had people dressing in completely ridiculous, not funny costumes. I just dismissed her like every other person I saw that freaked out when in my presence.

Little did I know that she would become a very influential part of my life.

It wasn't long before I worked out that she was on Chuckle City, and when I did, I didn't think twice about it. So they had a new cast member to try and bring up the ratings; big deal. It was just another pitiful and most likely to fail attempt to beat Mackenzie Falls. Mandy wasn't cutting it, so they replaced her. I never really paid any attention to Sonny the day I met her, considering I had no idea who she was.

Then I started paying attention when she barged onto my set in the middle of shooting a scene. I mean, who does that? And since Sonny is so hung up on being polite and courteous, does anyone not find it hypocritical that she interrupts a scene in the middle of filming? I had a deadline to meet! We argued, I used my charm to try and get her to let it go, and it worked - temporarily.

It's second nature to notice your costar's looks when you film a scene with them, so when I was charming Sonny and holding her hand, I couldn't help but notice she wasn't bad-looking, which really surprised me since she was a Random. I wasn't anywhere close to drooling or anything, don't misunderstand me, but I was pleasantly surprised. Or unpleasantly surprised, however you want to look at it. A good-looking girl on a show always attracts viewers, and that couldn't be good for MF.

Let me just say that Sonny isn't the type I would usually go for. Not that she is ugly or anything like that (Sonny will be ugly the day I am not The Greatest Actor of Our Generation. Yeah, never going to happen), but she was not originally my first choice. I'd go for the supermodel type; the curvy blonde type; the girl-on-a-magazine-cover type. Sonny is beautiful, but she isn't… fake. Of course then I didn't know that was the word I was looking for. I just thought she wasn't good enough. She was on Chuckle City, after all. Everything changed at the fateful Musical Chairs Challenge.

I realized that she is more than just someone who thinks she is 'funny' or who has a sick enjoyment for wearing stupid costumes. She is more than just a crazy 'comedian' who does not like drama (I still think there is a glitch somewhere in her brain). She does it by choice. She tricked me and won the game. She acted like she was hurt and pulled at my heart strings. I think that's when It began.

Once I realized that she had true dramatic potential, I started watching her. I still thought she was nuts for refusing my offer to be on Mack Falls, but then again, if you go on So Random! in the first place, you have problems. I'm sure all of you are familiar with when I convinced her to come to The Falls for a visit. When that was a bust, I stopped pretending and just showed my normal personality around her. It bugged her immensely since we are complete opposites, often sparking arguments between us that were either ridiculous or actually legitimate. I started looking forward to seeing the flames in her eyes when I'd hit a nerve; which was so easy to do. I could do it without even meaning to; but I always meant to, so that didn't really matter.

She proved to me that she can not only act, but can be cunning, which proved to me that we did have some similarities. When she videotaped me admitting that I pretty much completely used her for my own personal gain and gave it to Santiago, I gained a respect for her. Sonny Monroe apparently had a devious side. Before I could stop it, I automatically just admitted that I wanted to spend more time with her. This ring a bell?

Me: We should hang out sometime.

Sonny: The camera's off, Chad.

Me: I know.

That's when I stopped just watching and started feeling… things. Things I weren't used to. Things that freaked me out and things I'd never felt before. Things that made me go into denial. They definitely started coming out when Sonny, like I knew she eventually would, started attracting guys. I hate thinking back on it. I bristle just remembering the jerks she got involved with.

Like I admitted to maybe the biggest jerk of all, James, I stopped just admiring her dramatic and sneaky qualities. I started to really see her big, bright smile every day. I started to notice that laugh in a different way than I used to. It stopped being, for the lack of a better word, annoying. I used to either not really notice it or think, how can anyone be that happy all of the time? Seeing her hair bounce as she walked and really starting to notice not only her personality but her looks as well, I was getting… my attention caught. When she was in the room, I was thinking about her. Whether it was a confrontation we'd recently had that got me in a bad mood, a confrontation I was trying to come up with as an excuse to go bug her, or just her in general, she was on my mind in some shape of form, no matter how small.

From the moment I helped her up (and she helped me down) when I thought she was hurt, I would, at the most random moments, do something nice for her. At first, they were involuntary, and I don't remember even deciding to do it or realize I did anything until after it was done and I saw that big smile just for me. Then I started doing them on purpose, and it became more frequent. Our relationship developed from fulltime rivals to part-time rivals and part-time… something. A love/hate relationship I guess. Of course if you told that to me before we started dating, I would deny any romantic feelings for her whatsoever. She would do the same. Both of us had extreme denial issues.

I dressed up as Eric, I danced with her at prom, I was her fake date when she needed help getting rid of James (which I was only too happy to help with), and I helped her break up Bitterman and Marshall. With every thing I did, I wanted to do more. My… crush… was getting worse. I wasn't crushing anymore, I was starting to fall.

The day I got the call from Marshall to come and guest star on the show, I almost said no automatically, but then he knew the magic words. He explained to me that I'd be doing a sketch with Sonny, and I was almost pulled in. Then he told me what it was about, and I couldn't say yes fast enough. Of course I didn't let him know that; I played it cool and pretended like I was doing him a favor.

I told Sonny the truth: she would fall for me just like every other costar did. Except with her I was really hoping that she would. It was too late for me. We just needed cooperation on both sides. I knew it wouldn't be hard. I just had to turn on the charm and she was mine. It was the law of nature. But like she always managed to do, she somehow managed to slip out of it at the end. She stumbled, she had the dream, she got lost in my eyes, and my heart was racing (but I played it cool) when she started leaning in. But Sonny wasn't going to make it easy for me, of course. She realized what she was doing, and then a stupid pig got in the way for the final cut. I had to kiss a pig! See, that's why I don't work on Chuckle City. It's a sign from God.

I'm not recapping the Hayden thing; we all know I was MAJORLY angry about that. Imagine how it feels to wake up and find your Sonny LIP-LOCKING with some guy you don't even know on the cover of a tabloid? The second I saw it I stormed my way over to Stage 3 without thinking twice. I had to find some way to let her know that that was not okay without totally pouring my heart out to her… and to myself.

Then Gilroy's show. That was crazy. I'm sure you are all wondering what happened backstage between me and Sonny. To tell the truth, I am still wondering myself. It was obvious that I was losing my cool, and CDC doesn't do that. I don't lose my cool! I'm me! I could tell she was nervous too, which kept me optimistic. In the end, I think we both chickened out, realizing it probably wasn't safe… and we were just not ready. I know that you all saw the whole 'that was so much easier to say than I thought it'd be' thing, but in the end we just said that this probably wasn't the best time or place. I had a bad feeling, and see? There WAS a camera on us the whole time! That's why Sonny was so shocked when I asked her out. We just put it behind us and continued on with our confusing relationship.

Then when Sonny became obsessed with The Falls (I knew she'd come to her senses eventually) it was probably the best thing that happened to me. Not counting the horrible humiliation I felt when I asked her out and then I found out that she wasn't talking about US, deciding to take her advice and ask her out was the best decision of my life.

I'm sure you've all noticed my change in attitude. I am more thoughtful, considerate, caring, and I am not afraid to voice my feelings when Sonny is around and I desperately want to take my phone out and take pictures of her stupid cuteness. I can hug her whenever I want, let her know how much her smile brightens my day, tell her I miss her if she misses a day of work or is gone on a trip. The bottom line is:

Sonny makes me happy.

By the time of Gilroy's show, I'd stopped falling and was then on my knees, hopeless. Afterwards, the more I saw her, the worse it became. She was looking more and more beautiful each day. And then when she was finally mine; officially, undoubtfully, completely mine, I started to change. When I saw that beautiful face, heard the beautiful laugh, saw her gorgeous smile, looked into those big dark brown eyes, and wrapped my arms around her beautiful body every day, I became happier and happier.

I realized after our first date that I would need to become less egotistical for her. It was just part of it; Sonny is a fantastic girl all around, and she didn't deserve a jerk for a boyfriend. I needed to change. And I'm trying. And involuntarily, the more happy I become, the less unhappiness I have to release through big-headedness. She's my Sonny.

I tried to get Sonny Monroe out of my mind, but I couldn't even if I wanted to. I guess that's just fate.

That's what was going on inside the head of me, Chad Dylan Cooper. My friend ChAnNyObSeSsEd here is the 'Channy' infatuated fan I found to publish this. For someone who is completely crazy, she's alright.

Any questions for me? I thought I was pretty clear, but I'll get ChAnNyObSeSsEd to type up my responses.

The Greatest Actor of Our Generation,

CDC

Chad Dylan Cooper