Hi, I plan on continuing this if I get positive feedback. I put a lot of work into this thus far and am pretty happy with how it is turning out. Please review!
Chapter 1
On a Slope with Falling Cherry Blossoms – Part 1
Another typical summer day, walking to school – feeling the same as I did yesterday, thinking the same things I thought yesterday. I hate this town. It's too filled with memories I'd rather forget. I go to school every day, hang out with my friends, and then I go home – there's no place I'd rather not go ever again. I wonder if anything will ever change. Will that day ever come?
Approaching the hill that ascends to school, there is someone standing motionless at the bottom. As I get closer I notice it is a girl – I don't recognize her. She has shoulder length auburn hair and is wearing the same mandatory uniform all girls are to wear to school. Her uniform emblem is blue, which signifies that she is a senior.
As I pull up alongside her I stop for a second to see what she is doing. Suddenly, she blurts out with determination in her voice, "Anpan!" (Anpan – similar to a donut in Japan) I don't understand and probably have a puzzled look on my face.
She continues, "Do you like this school? I have to say that I love it very, very much. But soon everything changes, or at least it does eventually."
She isn't talking to me – she's probably talking to someone in her heart. "Fun things, happy things, they'll all eventually change one day, ya know? But can you still love this place?"
I quickly answer, "Just go and find more." This seems to startle her.
She turns and looks at me with eyes filled with shock and interest. The hairs on my neck stand tall and I can't help but feel a change in the air – like everything had come to life all at once.
The cherry blossom trees are in full bloom and as the pedals flow through the air – this moment almost seems like a dream. Why was she so interested in what I had to say? It wasn't like I said anything special.
"All you have to do is find other fun and happy things. It's not so hard," I add.
We pause and lock eyes for a moment. "Come on, let's hurry and get to school, we're already late."
I begin to move forward, she quickly follows, and so we begin a long, long upward climb.
When we get to the school entrance we split from each other – not even a single word is spoken. It's not like we'll ever talk again anyway. Besides, a delinquent like me is of no use to someone like her.
School doesn't get over quickly enough, and I am more than ready to get outside because the weather is perfect.
I should probably try harder at school, but I prefer to just coast through it. I have been a delinquent ever since things fell through for me in my basketball scholarship at this school.
One night during my freshmen year I got into it with my father. He pushed me into a window which then shattered – cutting my shoulder deep enough that I could never bring it back to full health. Ever since then I have been unable to lift my right arm – thus my life as a delinquent had begun.
My mother was killed tragically when I was just a child. I don't have any memory of her – just as I have no memory of my father ever being nice to me. He had been drinking ever since the accident that had killed the wife he lived for.
I look at the clock as the second hand inches closer to the time I have been waiting for since this morning. Finally the bell rings and I am set free from my imprisonment – or as some may call it, school.
Where to go? I hate going home because my father will be there, so I head for my friend Sunohara's place – a small dormitory that he shouldn't even be allowed to be in anymore. He is like me, the only reason we got accepted into this school was because of our athletic abilities, but because of untimely circumstances, we are no longer able to participate in the sports we had excelled in.
Sunohara was a star soccer player, but after a fight with the soccer team over the hierarchy system that was in place over the freshmen – Sunohara flipped. The rumor around school was he beat up three of the top senior players on the team that year all at once – which is pretty impressive considering his slim and short body type.
Sunohara has dyed beach blond hair which has made him a target amongst the bullies at school. It doesn't help that he tends to be very loud, belligerent and downright obnoxious.
When I arrive at the dorm I notice a large grouping of rugby players in the hall around Sunohara's door. I quickly begin to realize that they are pummeling Sunohara for something he probably deserves. He never was very good at being civil.
It doesn't take long for Misae, the dorm mother, to come bolting down the hall way holding her broom as if she was a warrior princess. "Quiet! Quiet! Will you all just knock it off!?" She yells.
The rugby guys all run for their lives, fearing the consequences of what is to come if they don't.
"Those stupid kids! I'm the one all the darn neighbors complain to, ya know?" She says in an almost defeated manner.
Must not be easy being dorm mother.
Sunohara is on the floor reaching out to his savior, "Misae, you should have come sooner to save me!"
She kicks him away and responds with dominance. "You're just as much at fault! I hope you learned your lesson after that little assault."
Defeated he replies, tears still running down his cheeks, "Yes mam," and we head for his dorm.
We enter into Sunohara's dorm-room. His room is what you'd expect of him – empty tea and soda bottles everywhere; random school books that he's probably never opened alongside manga that looks thoroughly read through; and a cleared out path to and from his bed made up of laundry and other random artifacts.
Sunohara, quick to recover and ready to talk big now that no one is around murmurs, "Dang rugby team jerk-offs."
"Nobody can hear you if you whisper… Dang those rugby team jerk-offs!" I yell.
Thump! A kick from the room next door has Sunohara's clock coming off the wall. "Who said that!?" they respond.
Sunohara goes pale and his eyes are filled with fear. He rushes over and gets in my face. "Are you trying to get me killed!?"
"You are such a whimp, you know that?" I say.
"Well, if it were just one of those guys I wouldn't give in – there's just too many of them." – Yeah right.
"But just wait and see, I'll get them all good just before our graduation day – then Okazaki as my best friend, I'll let you watch my back." He gives me thumbs up and a wink accommodated with a smile.
"Lucky me- I got you covered," I say with a smiling wink and thumbs up to reflect his enthusiasm – "but to be honest I am more on their side than yours."
Sunohara screams in his usual over exaggerated shocked voice, "What kind of friend are you!?"
Thump! Another kick to the wall has Sunohara jumping in fear, "Keep it down will ya!?" the neighbor yells angrily through the wall.
"Shall I kick him back?" I say with a leg raised in a kicking gesture toward the wall. Sunohara pulls at his hair in frustration and unbelief. What an easy target he makes of himself.
"Calm down, I am only joking. You're too wound up for your own good, ya know that?" I say.
Sunohara calms down, "Yeah, yeah – whatever."
The rest of my day consists of reading manga and napping at Sunohara's.
And so this day ends like all the others do, with no particular objective and nothing to feel passionate about – just another unexceptional day.
This is a world that has ended: nothing is born, nothing dies. Not even passing time exists. If I were looking for somewhere to be born, I don't think I'd choose this world. But in this world, such as it is, there is someone. I wonder if she can see me. I haven't been born into this world.
A girl living alone in a world that has ended, a girl living in this empty and still world – for some reason, I am bothered by that girl.
Another morning and another seemingly unexceptional day – I wonder if I will run into that girl from the bottom of the hill again. For some reason I am hoping that I do, but unfortunately I do not see her today. Why am I feeling this way about her all of a sudden?
As I am about to enter into class I hear, "Okazaki and Sunohara aren't here yet." – I stop and listen.
"I wonder what they're planning to do about going onto college and entrance exams – they're seniors you know," says another boy's voice in the room.
"Forget about those two, we don't need to waste a moment of our lives worrying over those two bums," says another.
This isn't something new to me – I know I am a delinquent. As I stroll in the boys look at me passing judgmental stares as I make my way to my seat.
I look out the window ready to daze off into space when suddenly.
"Uh, Okazaki," the fragile voice of my class leader Ryou almost whispers.
She is a fragile and meek girl – very cute, with dark short-shoulder length hair and deep blue eyes which is rare in a girl of our Japanese culture.
"What's the matter? Is something wrong?" I ask.
"Looks like you're a little late again today aren't you?" she asks with a gentle and nervous smile.
"So?" I question – knowing full well the answer.
"Well, I just think you should come to school on time every morning that's all," she says while pulling her arm over her chest in an almost defensive and scared way.
Oh my, is Ryou going to exercise her authority over me as class leader? That's laughable.
To be facetious I say, "Oh? You're sounding like the class leader or something you know that?"
"But it's not any 'or something', I really am the class leader," she looks like she might break into tears at any moment.
Someone from across the room calls out, "Hey Okazaki, don't make her cry – you'll have her big sister rushing in."
"Don't worry, I am not crying at all!" she yells out in a tone that sounds like tears are almost on the way.
I respond calm and gentle, "Okay, I got it. Let's just wait and see how I do tomorrow." Hoping this will be the end of this awkward conversation.
She doesn't let go so easily and says, "Oh uh, then I'll read your fortune for tomorrow. Fortune telling is my hobby you see." I'm almost positive that my face is one of the utmost disinterest at this moment.
She begins clumsily shuffling a deck of cards and shaking so much she fumbles the cards. They explode in the air like a firework and the cards fall rapidly to the floor.
"Oh boy," I mutter under my breath.
I begin to bend over to pick the cards up when Ryou says with concern, "It say's you're going to be late tomorrow…"
I can't help but fall flat out of my chair, "Are you trying to make me mad?" I ask.
"It's just what the cards say – I think this is your future," she says with a smile that's too harmless to be angry at.
"You think that's my future?" I ask in disbelief of how pleasantly rude she is being today.
She looks down to the cards on the floor and begins describing how she came to see my future. While looking at the queen of spades she says, "On your way to school, you'll have a romantic meeting with a sweet girl," her eyes dart over to the 10 of diamonds, "you'll forget all about the time," then the ace of hearts, "and that's why you're going to be late!"
"Seems to be awfully specific isn't it?" I ask in astonishment.
"You can call it a maiden's inspiration!" she say's with so much passion I don't know if I should be serious with her or just laugh.
"Hey! Tomoya Okazaki," says a serious toned female voice from the classroom door.
Before I know it, all I see is what looks like a fairly large algebra book flying straight for my face. I barely have time to duck it as it flies out the window – scattering a couple of pigeons from the tree across the schoolyard.
"Sister, what is it?" Ryou asks in her usual concerned and frightened tone.
Kyou – Ryou's older twin sister – is standing at the door. Just as cute and practically identical besides her long hair that reaches down past her waste and her dark brown eyes. There is one drastic difference in these two though – one is timid as a mouse and the other is as deranged as a gorilla – especially when someone is picking on her little sister.
"You've got some nerve picking on my little sister you good for nothing punk!" she says angrily as she stomps toward me and yanks me by my school uniform tie, "I'm going to beat you!"
"Geez, will you relax? I was only talking to her!" I say.
Ryou says in a nervous laugh, "That's right sis, he wasn't picking on me – heh," waving her hands to affirm it is a misunderstanding.
Kyou examines her sister to be sure of it then says, "Oh, in that case," releasing my tie from her kung-fu grip.
Kyou realizes what was actually going on and asks, "We're you having Ryou read your fortune or something?"
Fed up with the situation I answer, "Yeah, she say's I'll have a romantic meeting with a sweet girl tomorrow."
Kyou gives me a look of interest as if she is sizing me up and says, "Is that so?"
"Okay! What's up with that face?" I say – irritated.
Kyou gets a big smile on her face and says, "Nothing at all lover boy! Well, good luck!" She pats me on the shoulder in the least encouraging way and turns away laughing a laugh that makes it obvious – 'nothing' meant something.
I've always had the feeling that Ryou had a crush on me and that her sister Kyou was diligently trying to set us up. I don't know how to handle it, why would an honor student want anything to do with a guy like me? I am just a waste of space and good for nothing. Besides, even if I did decide to pursue and date her it wouldn't work out. The people in this school would tear us apart before our chance at love even really got a chance to happen.
Honor student and a delinquent – please, this isn't some high school soap opera.
Lunch time rolls around, and I am wandering the halls thinking over the idea of skipping class. I look out the window and find the girl from the bottom of the hill.
She is eating lunch sitting outside on a garden retaining wall with absolute perfect posture, what is she some kind of goody-goody? But she is all alone – doesn't she have any friends? And why am I so concerned about this girl? Is it that I am finding that her loneliness matches my own in such a way that I want to comfort her?
Before I know it I am walking out to her and say, "Hey, you alone? You should eat in the classroom with your friends." She continues eating her anpan roll, and completely ignores me as if I wasn't talking to her.
"Are you listening to me?" I ask.
"No, I'm so sorry. I – I'm in the middle of my lunchtime meal," she says innocently.
As if something unknown was just discovered I say, "So I see."
I go ahead and take a seat next to her and we eat our lunches in complete silence together. It's a little awkward but it's not like I care. Besides I would feel bad leaving this girl all alone out here.
She finishes up her lunch and asks, "What did… So what did you want?"
"Nothing really, I was just wondering why you were here eating lunch alone?" I ask.
Facing forward and staring off into the ground with a depressed look on her face asks, "Let me ask you… Do you like this school very much?"
While my mouth is still full I reply in shock of such a silly question, "No, not especially."
Where did this come up? Why does she care so much about my opinion?
She replies, "I love this school very, very much. I used to have friends I could talk too and teachers I was close too. But now it's just…"
She seems to have gotten lost in sad thoughts and I interrupt curiously, "Did something happen?"
"It's just that I was out of school for a long time last year, so now everything is different, and I…" and again she pauses in a way that compels me to encourage her to continue.
I try to finish her sentence, "Have to take the year over?"
With a smile of embarrassment she looks at me and says, "Yes, I'm a repeater," adding a nervous laugh.
She turns and looks toward the ground again and continues, "Everybody that I knew graduated and has gone on to their lives, so there isn't anyone I know here anymore."
She gets this cute distressed look on her face and says, "It's kind of weird, but I feel a little like Rip Van Winkle."
At this point I am intrigued by this girl and I can't help but look at her in anticipation to see what she will say next. I can relate to her situation since I feel similar about my own life. Ever since not being able to play basketball and living at home with a father with whom I am estranged – I can't help but feel cut off from the world.
She suddenly turns to me with complete embarrassment realizing all that she just exposed about herself to a stranger and says, "Oh! I'm sorry, I've only just met you and I'm already telling you all this." But I don't mind at all.
"Why not join a club at school? I'll bet you could make lots of friends that way." I say.
She looks down to ground again and says, "Well, I really want to join the schools drama club, but I don't know… Physically I am weak so I can't be very active – so I don't think I'd get any parts."
This troubles me, nobody should have such little confidence in them self, "If that's the case – then just do as much as you can. Why not at least go check out the drama club room after school?"
She gets a look on her face of nervousness about the idea and says, "But I…" I cut her off before she can finish that sentence.
I notice two people on the roof of the school looking down in our direction while in conversation and say, "Oh look, they're looking this way."
In hopes to lift her up from this self-defeated attitude I say with a half smile, "If you're always looking so sad then you won't make any friends – try smiling and waving at them."
She turns and looks at me with uncertainty but I further encourage her, "Come on just try it, a big smile."
So with a smile that obviously shows a lack of confidence, she looks up to them and begins to wave, but they're already turning around – walking out of site from the school grounds as if we didn't even exist.
I myself even feeling a bit defeated say, "They didn't notice you."
Low in spirit she adds, "I guess I don't stand out much, not even in my classes."
I stand up and say, "Well, I have to go."
It's not that I want to go, but I don't know what else to say at a time like this. After all I just failed in my attempt to help her.
She stands up with a big smile on her face and says, "Uh yes, of course. Thank you so very much."
Her eyes look as though she is genuine in saying this and it's painful to me because I feel like I only made things worse.
"Oh, I am Tomoya Okazaki of class D," I say.
"My name is Nagisa Furukawa of class B, nice to meet you," she says still smiling that earnest piercing smile of genuine gratitude for what I feel was a failure.
Out of formality I add, "Nice to meet you."
She follows suit, still smiling and says, "It was very nice to meet you, Tomoya Okazaki."
Why is she so thankful to me? I didn't do anything and when I tried to help I just made things worse.
Just like me, Furukawa is downcast about the life that should be. Is there anything that will ever change for the people like me; like Sunohara; like Furukawa? We have been outcast from society and brought down to being the nobodies. We're the people that hang our heads in the background of all the smiling happy people around us. Why are things so helpless for us? Will our day ever come?