I have been changed, haven't I?

I looked up to the sky. The stars sparkled like thousands of diamonds, and the Jellicle Moon, which was covered by some clouds, shined even brighter than usual. Tonight was the night. Tonight was the night of the Jellicle Ball.

A gentle shiver ran down my spine. I had waited for this evening for such a long time, preparing myself for months in learning every single dance move and every single note of each and every song. It was no burden for me, in fact, I felt honored. Old Deuteronomy, my grandfather, gave me the permission to celebrate the night with my friends and family, despite the fact I wasn't technically old enough to come of age. He said I was very mature for my age, and that I saw the world differently than other cats in my age did. As such, he believed it would be appropriate for me to transition to queenhood alongside my friends.

It was a dream come true, especially because it was also my sister's Coming-Of-Age-Ball. As her little sister, I saw it as my duty to support her and to make sure we both enjoyed our last evening as kittens, despite the dreaded dance she had to perform that evening. To make sure she enjoyed that night with the other Jellicles and, of course, with Misto. Everlasting Cat, thank you for having brought him into Rory's life. He was the perfect tom for her- smart, gentle, adorable, sincere, generous. Not like that son of a Pollicle, Plato!

I couldn't help but let a nasty little laugh fall out of my mouth. Mom and Dad didn't like when I cursed as a little kitten. They always told me not to soil my spirit with such unnecessary expressions. But I wasn't a little kitten anymore. I had grown up, I had changed. My appearance, my thoughts, my soul. Feelings I never felt before filled my heart. Emotions, I couldn't control. Who'd have ever thought that growing up would be so much more difficult than being a kitten? So what would happen after my so-called mating dance? Would I find somebody who'd love me? Or maybe…

I had to smile. Maybe it would be that certain tom who caused me to have butterflies in my stomach. That certain tom who always made me laugh. That certain tom to whom I owed such strange and new feelings. Did Victoria feel the same way for Mistoffelees, I thought? Was it the same feeling which connected Mommy and Daddy? Could it be…? Love?

"Hey, sis! Are you already sleeping? The night hasn't even begun and I doubt that you wanna miss the Ball." Absorbed in my thoughts, I didn't notice Victoria, who sat beside me, her eyes also aimed towards the moon. Tory's beautiful white fur seemed to glow in the moonlight and the diamonds on her collar sparkled brilliantly, shining as bright as the stars. Tory was no longer a kitten, she was a queen. Beautiful and feminine, proud and self-confident. For a small moment I felt a flash of something resembling jealousy, but it disappeared almost immediately. Tory was and will always be my sister. And I love her.

"So- sorry Tory, I wasn't listening, I-I was thinking… about something… someone"

"You don't say! Is that 'someone' perhaps an incredibly flirty black and white tom, who's Misto's brother and by the way much older than you?" She gave me an amused but also slightly concerned look. I had to sigh. For nearly everyone I was like a closed book; they might have seen my appearance; the cute, tiny, youngest member of the Jellicle Tribe, but nobody, except Tory knew who I was inside. Maybe it was the strong bonds of sisterhood, maybe she knew me too well. Maybe it was the worst case, and my feelings for Mistoffelees' older brother Alonzo were just too obviously.

"Damn it, Tory! We are just good friends"

"Come on Jem, don't lie to me. You know you're a miserable liar. Whenever anyone even mentions his name, your face looks like those tomatoes Mungo and Teazer threw at Tugger's bum."

We both had to giggle. I will never forget the curious cat's face after his rump had turned nearly the same color as Aunt Bomba's fur. And the way he chased after the notorious couple of cats as the whole junkyard laughed. Remembering that day made me smile. Some cats will never grow up, but maybe that's the best, otherwise the life would be very boring.

I looked to Victoria who became silent while I thought. Her eyes once again rested on the moon. "Does she think about the same things as me?" I thought. "Is she scared about the future?"

Without any words, I hugged her tightly."You'll see, this will be your night. The Invitation to the Ball, the Mating Dance; it will all work out! You don't have to be scared."

Her eyes filled with tears, and a silent sob escaped her. "Jem… I-I can't do this"

I was surprised. I had never seen her completely drained like this. Rory's body began to shiver; tears after tear ran down her cheeks, and her big blue eyes were full of despair. My heart wanted to do anything; to say something that could dry her tears, but my mind won.

"What do you mean?"

Drying her tears, she began to speak. "It's because of the Mating Dance..."