This is a drabble fic. There is no rhyme or reason to the updates. It could be 2 chapters it could be 30.

Enjoy the ride and happy holidays.

"You really don't want to know, Bells?"

Alice's annoying voice broke through the daydream of the cake that was now walking towards me.

Ok, the cake wasn't so much as walking towards me as it was being carried by a group of waiters with too-happy smiles. They were also singing a too-happy song.

My wine hadn't set in yet. I was a bit crabby.

Well fuck them anyways.

Amen sister.

I was at a birthday dinner with my best friend Alice and her boy toy Xavier. He was some Latin deity or something I was sure of it.

No one should look that perfect.

It was like a perpetual breeze always held his hair back in its style without use of gel or anything.

Fucking perfect, fuck.

Oh I guess I should introduce myself. My name is Bella Swan and I am celebrating my 25th birthday today. I was born September 13, 2013 to Renee and Charlie Swan in LA after some whim trip that my mother wanted to have. She didn't want to fly, not because she wasn't allowed to, being bigger than a cow, but because of some incessant fear of flying. Hence why she never visited when I went away for school.

I'm not bitter.

Anyways I am 25 today, so that would make the year 2038. Since I was born there have been about three 'apocalypse' scares, a cure for cancer has been found and sold over the counter at Walgreens for $20 bucks a pop.

Not a figure of speech, the cure literally comes in a popsicle now.

Where was I? Oh cure for cancer, Spongebob is still on TV but it is rated PG-13 and Blue Ivy is on track for being the next president of the Free World.

No, cars don't hover. What the fuck would be the point? I can't hover over other cars so I'd be in traffic above the ground where I can't even get out and curse like a sailor in the street? Next!

Where was I? shit?

Right! I'm Bella Swan, well Isabella Swan, named after my mom's favorite aunt Issy.

Good woman, always gave me $50. No reason for giving it to me, she just did. What if she was trying to pick me up? Well this is awkward.

I'm 25 and I'm having dinner with Alice and Xavier.

Say eggs-za-vi-er not za-vi-er. Annoys him to no end.

The floating cake had now appeared in front of me and the idiots were still singing. I took my shot and blew on the candles hoping to create some massive flame ball like a dragon and burn them to a crisp for silence, but it didn't work.

Motherfuckers

Sorry, I tend to cuss a whole fucking lot. Not for any reason other than the fact that I can.

Sue me.

When the one-fry-short-of-a-happy-meal group left, I turned to Alice who was chastising me for stabbing my finger down the middle of the cake.

"Really Bella," she said with a sour look on her face, "It's like you were grown in a barn."

"I prefer the term extraordinary outdoor area for talented mammals," I responded. "Barn sounds so barbaric."

She snorted but other than that there was silence at the table as I silently munched at my cake.

Mmmm cake.

He want that cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake. Oh, baby I like it you're so excited, don't try to hide it. Imma make you my bitch.

I now had the urge to dye my hair bright red.

I could do worse things.

Gotta love the oldies. Better than that shit on the airwaves nowadays.

"So you seriously don't wanna know?" Alice piped up whilst I licked my fingers.

"Nope," I said with my middle finger caught between my teeth. I think it sounded like 'ope' so I shook my head for emphasis.

"Isabella," she looked at me and shook her head disapprovingly.

"Mary Alice!" I mocked her.

She hates that.

I looked at eggecutor, like the pokemon, signing with my eye my need for him to lodge his tongue down her throat or something but the idiot was to busy in his own thoughts to even recognize me looking at him.

Self-centered ass. He's probably not even thinking about anything important.

I wonder was shampoo he use-

"Isabella!"

fuck.

"Sorry what was that, Ali?" I mean it's okay if I think-talk to myself. It'd be scary if I said all this shit out loud.

"I said, what if I told you I knew?"

"I know you know yours, Ali," I said "I was there when you found out and he ain't it." I looked at Enrique even though I had whispered the last part.

I've taking to renaming Alice's boyfriends when I see fit.

So I looked at David, say dah-vid, not david. And saw that he was still lost in his own thoughts.

Her sour face came back, just when she was getting pretty again.

"Your face is gonna get stuck like that."

"I wasn't talking about me, Bella," she ignored my comment. " I was talking about you."

My eyes must have bugged out of my head when she said that.

"How the fuck do you know, sprite?"

"Renee bought it for you for your birthday," she shrugged like it was no big deal.

"and you opened it you nymph?"

Meh. I wasn't angry per se, but whatever.

"Okay, let me see it."

I held out my name for the little wristband but she shook her head at me.

"Okay, so you don't want me to see it then?"

I was confused. I didn't like being confused.

"It's at the house."

"fuck that," I said through a snort. "I am not going home tonight because I am not going to your surprise party."

"There isn't one." She is the world's best poker player because of that face. I couldn't tell if she was lying or not. Enrique on the other hand was not and the confused look on his face must have meant he was told there was a party or he had been daydreaming for so long that he didn't know who Alice was.

I felt the smugness wrap around my face.

3 glasses of wine later I was walking into my house when a gazillion people screamed out 'Surprise'.

"A) It wasn't a surprise I just know no one better be in my room. B) I don't even know all you people and C) If all the cake is gone, I will kill you."

They laughed. I wasn't joking.

Alice approached me with 'the gift' in her hand, the gift that would more or less ruin my life.

That was a bit mellow dramatic

What if it said 'never'?

I could buy a kitten. WIN!

Oh a tiny white one with thick fur I'd call it Seabiscuit.

Or a orange one wit-

"Isabella, open it." Alice chimed.

As I looked around I noticed everyone had stopped and was staring at me, except Mike Newton. He was probably going to memorise the date and kidnap me then.

We met on October 3rd, 2021, in the fourth grade at 8 am. I had the date memorized because he constantly reminded me that when I got the wristband and the dates matched, there'd be proof that he was my soulmate.

Lost?

You see a few years ago, there was some witchy shit that happened and the result ended up to be the funky looking wristbands that had the date of when you would meet your soulmate.

Think of modern day Aphrodite becoming the President in 2020 and believing that the entire world just needed love. She aimed taxpayer's dollars to finding a way to get everyone a soul mate. They are activated on the 25th of everyone's birthday. Not very pricey only a close family member can purchase the band. That was her way of keeping families close.

Don't ask me why because I don't know but there hasn't been a band that was wrong yet.

I personally believe it's a mind over matter thing. Of course if you believe you're gonna fall in love then you will put yourself out there. There is no way you will get hurt, but I am still trying to work out how they ensure that two people with the same times are at the same place at that time.

Burn the witch!

"Could ya back the fuck up, please," I said to everyone.

My eyes locked onto a pair of unfamiliar green ones before everyone shifted and the greens were lost.

Which reminds me, I need to make an appointment to go golfing with the big wigs sometime next week.

I looked at the clock, which read 11:27pm and then opened the box.

Looking up at me from the box was the date: September 14th, 2038 12 am.

Well fuck.

see you soon.

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