Bella's heart beat erratically, feeling as if it were about to explode from her chest. She took deep breaths as she glanced out the window, watching as trees flew passed her. The dreary town of Forks, Washington was now her home, one that she had never even seen outside of pictures. The town was under constant cover of dark clouds, and spatters of rain. The temperature in this small town, population 3,175, never reached more than fifty degrees year round. This was the dreary little town of Forks her mother had shipped her off to in her will.
Bella's parents, Renée and Charlie, had recently passed away in a car accident, killing them instantaneously. Bella had been an emotional wreck ever since, not muttering a single word, yet not breaking down once. The adoption agent had been wary when this piece of information, that she never talked, was received, assuming Esme would change her mind about her and refuse to take Bella in, not wanting a teenage daughter full of such remorse. Much to everyone's surprise, Esme smiled at the piece of new information and replied that it would be interesting to see how Bella cooperated with the other kids. The adoption papers had been signed almost immediately, Esme making sure Bella wasn't sent off to some stranger's home, even though in Bella's eyes Esme was a stranger.
Bella had never met Esme before except one Christmas when Bella was a young girl, maybe the age of four, and obviously, Bella hardly remembered the memory. Although, Bella knew she had to trust this woman and her family, because Renée had.
A rain drop slithered to the bottom of the fogged window, racing the slow drops behind it. Bella watched as the teardrop form became a line of water, then turning into multiple drops. All Bella could focus on was the water, if she looked up and saw where she was, what was happening around her, she would lose it, let down her barriers she had been so carefully keeping up. Bella would be crying over the two most important people in her life. She would fall apart at the seams, the tears she had been keeping at bay would spill over and fall rapidly down her face.
Her two fingers played with the seam of her jacket and the loose thread that hung from the stitches. Bella's feet took turns resting on one another, a nervous habit Bella got from her father. Her lip stayed between her teeth, almost to the point of drawing blood, a habit she had picked up from her mother.
Tears formed in Bella's deep brown eyes, ready to spill down her cheeks, her nails digging into her palm. Esme had been talking for a while now, Bella tuning her out, not wanting to face the reality that she had been adopted, that her mother could no longer be there for her. Even though Bella and Renée were never really close didn't mean Bella didn't depend on her mother. It didn't mean that Bella didn't love her mother and father with all her heart, because she did.
"You'll get along lovely with Emmett and Alice, Bella! They're very friendly," Esme told her in a nurturing tone.
Bella tried with all her heart to ignore the woman beside her, but failed as Esme spoke of her family. "Carlisle is very loyal to the family, but works most all the time, dedicating himself to the hospital. Rosalie is slightly hostile, but once she realizes you're a true part of the family she'll accept you completely." True part of the family resonated itself throughout Bella's mind, echoing over and over, stabbing her each time. "Jasper keeps to himself mostly, but he jumps in on conversation. Edward however is much different from all of the others," she says with a slight sigh. "He's been angry quite a lot lately, his mood never quite recognizable." Bella groaned to herself, not letting the sound escape. "Carlisle and I are hoping it's a passing phase."
A passing phase, Bella thought, and prayed to herself that the woman was right. She couldn't deal with the loss of her parents and an angry hormonal teenage boy, only a year older than herself.
Suddenly they swerved to the right, the car turning onto a rocky drive. "We live a way behind the trees, I hope that doesn't bother you. We like the privacy."
Of course Bella didn't mind, but she kept her mouth shut, hoping to keep any emotion she carried, locked away within herself.
"Here we are," she said with a proud smile.
Bella saw the modern home through the window, the home seeming to be mostly constructed of glass and a polished wood. The home was beyond gorgeous, looking as if it had peeled right off a magazine cover. Trees crowded around the magnificent structure, moss hanging and crawling up branches. Pale white concrete steps led up to the front door, rocks lining the sides of the driveway.
Esme, Bella had noticed, had already hopped out of the car, headed to get Bella's few bags. Bella took a deep breath before opening her door, stepping into her new life.
As soon as Bella's converse shoes hit the rubble, two boys around her age, give or take a year or two, came marching out of the house, welcoming smiles on their faces. Both boys were very tall, pale, and slightly intimidating with gold eyes. One had curly black hair, a great smile, with muscles bulging from head to toe. The other was slightly lanky, purple rings under his eyes, blonde hair a mop on top of his head.
"Here Mom, we'll take those," the curly cues said, grabbing a suitcase from Esme's grasp. The lanky boy came up behind his brother, grabbing the last bag.
"Oh, thank you boys! I'd like to introduce you to Bella," Esme said, going to place a hand on Bella's shoulder. "Bella this is Emmett," she gestured to the boy with multiple muscles, "and this is Jasper."
Both boys smiled happily at Bella. "Nice to meet you Bella," Jasper said politely, a southern drawl to his voice.
Bella gave a slight smile, wanting nothing more than to go to her new room and curl up with her pillow and take two pain killers to soothe her throbbing headache.
"Let's get inside and introduce you to everyone else," Esme suggested, leading Bella into the house.
Bella's rubber soles scraped against the steps, creating a scratching sound that raised goosebumps on her skin. She pulled her jacket more tightly around her. As Esme opened the door, Bella took in her surroundings. She first took notice of the pale paint that covered the walls, a creamy white, almost the color of the Cullen's skin. Hardwood flooring was from wall to wall, the house done in a very natural setting. Bella felt out of place the moment her muddy sneakers dropped onto the flooring.
"Is your father home yet? I told him to get off work before Bella and I arrived," Esme scolded her husband.
"I'm right here love," a man replied with a slight chuckle. This man was better looking than the two holding her bags. He looked inhuman. His blonde hair was straight against his head, slightly long, falling into his eyes. "Hello Bella, my name is Carlisle."
Bella stood still, taking a few moments to realize he was acknowledging her. Bella nodded slightly, her eyes falling to the flooring beneath her feet.
"Rosalie and Alice should return shortly, you can meet them later," Carlisle smiled.
"Where's Edward?" Esme asked, seeming hesitant to know the answer.
Carlisle blew air from his lips in a sigh, something that seemed unnatural for him. "Edward's-"
"Right here," a musical tone chimed from behind us.
The sudden noise startled Bella, causing her to slightly jump, her breath hitched. She turned to look at this stranger that seemed to be a problem toward his parents. Bella had expected to see a boy in his late teens, his hair dyed an unnatural black, multiple piercings, and maybe a tattoo or two, but he was none of the listed. Edward had bronze hair that was untamed, wild. His eyes were a cold gold, his skin completely unmarked and perfect. Edward wore a light blue polo with khakis, polished leather shoes upon his feet. He seemed almost normal, yet too beautiful to be a part of the world she was familiar with.
Edward smirked slightly, a puff of air escaped his lips as he tried to hold in slight laughter as he looked at Bella's disheveled appearance at his entrance. "I'm going out," he told his parents, his eyes leaving Bella, looking out the window beyond everyone.
"Where are you going?" Esme asked in a motherly tone. "Don't you want to meet Bella?"
"Hi," he said in a way that made him seem more like a smart ass.
Bella gave a slight acknowledgement, her hand raising, her lips pulling into an awkward half smile. Edward rolled his eyes, then turned for the door, grabbing his keys from his pants pocket. "Where are you going?" Esme asked once again, the same patient tone she had used before still present in her voice.
"Out," was his only reply before he slammed the door, the sound echoing through the large home.
Later that afternoon, after Emmett and Jasper showed Bella to her room and she had unpacked, she flopped on her new bed letting the day's emotions catch up to her. A few tears fell from her eyes, her hand fisting around the purple sheets that the unknown Alice had picked out for her. They were too nice for Bella, too expensive to the eye. Bella was used to scratchy white sheets, a worn out mattress, and the cold night wind fly through her bedroom window. The Cullens had only known Bella personally for a short day and already they had spent a fortune on her, before they had even said hello. Bella needed the simplicity where money was tight, always bargaining for the best price. She needed the simplicity of her parents.
An hour or so later Bella awoke to the sound of a soft knock from her bedroom door. She hadn't remembered falling asleep, but all the crying she had done she wasn't surprised she had been exhausted, her eyes now swollen. Bella slowly got out from under the covers, her jeans creating a scratching sound against the sheets that sent a chill down her spine.
Bella wrapped her arms around her midriff as she went to the door. She opened the door to find a young girl around her own age, that was much shorter than she was with spiked black hair. At the sight of the girl, Bella took a step back, her hand still wrapped around the doorknob.
"I'm sorry were you asleep?" her voice trilled, the girl's eyes taking in Bella's demeanor.
Bella shook her head and shrugged slightly.
"I'm Alice," the pixie girl extended a hand that had multiple shopping bags around her wrist. Bella examined the girl, wondering how she expected Bella to shake hands. "Whoops! Forgot about these," she giggled. "Do you mind if I come in?"
Bella moved out of the way for the strange girl, closing the door behind her. Bella motioned her hand toward the bags, going to sit on the edge of her bed.
Alice gave a smile directed at Bella. "They're for you! Esme said you didn't have many bags and didn't know exactly what clothing you owned so Rose and I went shopping today and bought you a few things." At that moment a blonde woman, maybe a few years older than Bella, waltzed in the room, two handfuls of pink and glittery bags. "Speak of the devil," she chuckled. "Hey Rosie we were just talking about you."
Rosalie smiled sheepishly over at her sister and then over at Bella. "Hi, I'm Rosalie. You can call me Rose."
Bella smiled back awkwardly, not knowing how to approach the girls.
"I sure hope you don't mind us picking out your wardrobe. If we left anything out we can always go out and get it, okay?" Rosalie offered.
Bella's eyes slightly widened, as if to say there couldn't possibly be more she needed than what was already bought.
"Well, we'll leave you alone to get some sleep. We didn't mean to bother you. See you in the morning," Alice said with a smile as both girls got up and headed for the door. "But tomorrow I expect a fashion show to see how everything looks!"
Rosalie smiled warily at her sister as she pulled Alice out of the room, the door clicking shut behind them. Bella didn't bother looking through the multiple bags that lingered on her floor full of clothing that Bella didn't exactly know if she would like. She crawled back in bed, not bothering to change into her sweats and shirt.
Her head hit the pillow, her eyes starting to close, her breathing becoming more even before Bella soon fell asleep. Not but a few hours later Bella woke up, tossing and turning in bed, not being able to lie still any longer. She glanced over to the wall that was a complete window, the dark night sky still present. Bella let out a sigh and sat up, throwing her legs over the side of the bed. She ran a hand through her hair as she got up, tiptoeing to the door, hoping not to wake anyone. All the lights were off making it difficult to make her way to the kitchen, not remembering exactly what floor she was on and where the kitchen was located. Bella then saw a light on at the end of the hallway she was currently in. She fumbled toward it, hoping to find her way to getting a glass of water. When she made it to the light managing not to break anything, to her disappointment it wasn't the kitchen, but a room that was fascinating to her nonetheless.
The room before her wasn't the kitchen, but Edward's room, she assumed. He lay on a sofa placed in the middle of the room, classical music streaming through the speakers placed on the crowded bookshelf. His foot tapped lightly to the rhythm. Bella's eyes lingered too long, for his head snapped up. Bella quickly started down the dark hallway as she saw him get up.
"Hey!" he said quite loudly, chasing after her.
Bella turned, looking for him in the dark, still not muttering a sound.
"What were you doing? Were you watching me?" Edward accused.
Bella wanted to run back into bed, pull the covers high over her head and stay there, or at least tell him she wasn't meaning to stare, but she couldn't talk, she wouldn't dare.
"What? Can't you talk?" he threw at her, as she took a shaky step backward.
Bella responded to this. She shook her head slightly, her eyes never leaving him. She could physically feel his anger slightly subside.
"You can't talk?" he asked.
Bella didn't know how, let alone want, to share the story of why she didn't talk. Instead she lied, shaking her head once again.
"That still doesn't excuse why you were watching me," he said, anger still evident in his voice.
Bella shook her head, hoping he'd understand that she hadn't meant to stare.
Edward watched her curiously, but instead of trying to understand, he turned his back on her, his voice floating to her, "Don't let it happen again."
Just like that his door slammed shut, Edward not bothering to take a second glance back. Bella quickly ran back up the stairs, forgetting about the water, and just hoping that she wouldn't break anything before she climbed back into bed, not caring if sleep found her or not. Edward slightly scared her, but now she knew there was a person behind the thick coating he wore so well. There was a boy that cared deep down.
The next morning Bella awoke to the smell of breakfast and the sound of something being fried. Bella slowly got out of bed, changing her shirt before making her way down the stairs, now being able to see the full expanse of the home from the brilliant sunlight shinning through the windows. The family sat in the living room doing multiple things while Esme cooked breakfast.
Bella didn't bother going to the crowded living room, instead going to sit on a barstool in front of the stove where Esme was keeping herself busy. "Good morning," Esme greeted her with a smile. Bella smiled back slightly as she watched the woman fix eggs. "Hungry?"
Bella shrugged, not exactly hungry, but able to eat.
Esme gave a small smile. "It's a shame I don't get to hear that pretty voice your mother always used to talk about," she said, grabbing a plate down from the cabinets, dishing out eggs for Bella.
The mere mention of her mother brought tears to her eyes, but snagged her attention as well. Bella silently begged Esme to continue on about Renée, but of course she didn't. Instead she slid the breakfast to Bella, and placed a fork beside Bella's hand. "There you go sweetie."
Esme turned her back, going to start on the dishes. Bella has questions racing through her mind, words on the tip of her tongue waiting for her mouth to open, but her mind refused to cooperate, keeping her thoughts in the back of her mind.
What else had her mother told Esme? What had Renée told Esme about her?
The thoughts racing through her mind, Bella took a few bites of eggs, soon losing interest in them. She quickly took care of her plate, throwing the leftovers in the garbage.
"Here, I'll take care of that," Esme said, grabbing the plate from Bella's hands. "How about you take my car out for a drive?" she offered. "It is summer after all and you need to find something to do all day. I bet Alice could go with you if you wanted."
As Bella was about to shake her head at the thought of the tiny pixie girl bouncing around, dragging Bella with her, Alice was already at Bella's side. "Of course!"
Esme smiled at both of the girls. "Sounds like a plan," Esme said happily. "Have fun you two!"
Alice grabbed Bella's hand, pulling her into the small yellow Porsche. Bella sat uncomfortably in the passenger seat as Alice zoomed out of the driveway and headed to the tiny town.
"I know I'm being overbearing," Alice told Bella, slightly embarrassed, " and I'm sorry. I just know that once you get comfortable in our home, we'll be really close friends."
Bella relaxed slightly, appreciating the girl's apology. She nodded, and offered Alice a half smile.
"I really want you to feel at home with us Bella, and I know that's more than a difficult task with your situation, but we want you to know that we want youto be happy and we want you to know that we want you to live with us, please don't think we got stuck with you."
Tears gathered in Bella's eyes as she turned to Alice. Alice looked away from the road to see what Bella's response was. A thank you was mouthed from Bella's lips, a single tear rolling down her cheek.
"There's no need for a thank you, but you're more than welcome Bella."
Bella relaxed into the seat, wiping tears from her eyes, hating the thought of someone seeing her cry. "I thought I'd show you the school and a few little places down the road."
Bella nodded, looking out the window. "There's the high school," Alice said, pointing to across the road after passing moss that hung from tree branches for the last ten minutes.
Bella looked out the window. It looked like any other high school, bricks stacked on top of one another creating a cell for all teenagers. Down the road was a small diner, and beyond that was a small bait shop run by someone Alice called the Newtons.
"That's practically the whole town," Alice said, making a U-turn to head back to the Cullen home.
Bella's eyes slightly widened. The whole town was practically a road. You blink and you've gone straight through it. Alice laughed at Bella's expression. "There's only three hundred and fifty-seven students at the high school, well now three hundred and fifty-eight."
Bella couldn't believe it. At her high school in Phoenix there had been more than seven hundred students in her grade! A laugh bubbled up from Bella's throat as tears spilled down her face, her hands immediately going to cover her eyes. She couldn't deal with the change due to her parents' deaths. She needed a rock, she needed someone she knew she could trust and count on. Bella needed a safe place. Alice was there for her it seemed, but she needed a preexisting friend or family member that could tell her she would be all right, that things would get better! Bella considered herself alone in a world she didn't want to face. At that moment Bella realized she indeed was alone. Bella realized she was an orphan, and no matter who adopted her and told her they loved her, Bella would remain an orphan for the rest of her life.
Alice worriedly chased after Bella as they arrived back at the mansion she would now call "home." "Bella wait! Bella what's wrong?"
Bella ignored the tiny girl that desperately wanted to be there for her. Bella pushed open the white wooden door, pushing tears off her face as she darted toward the stairs leading to her new room. All the Cullen's heads snapped in Bella's direction as they heard the door swing open, as they heard Bella's sniffles. "Bella?" a few called along with Alice, but Bella pushed all of their voices out of her head, her mind only focusing on not tripping going up the steps. Her head positioned downward to watch her footing, she ran into a solid form after her feet made it to the platform on the second story. Her cries faltered slightly as she whispered a curse, her hair falling in her eyes, her body heaving. She expected to find a large piece of furniture that she hadn't notice stand in her way, but what she found was even more unpleasant and embarrassing. As she looked up to see what she had hit, golden eyes met hers.
Another Cullen, she thought to herself, trying to push herself passed the new "family member" she now beheld, but cold hands wrapped around her upper arms.
"Let me go," she cried, almost a shriek.
"What's wrong?" the voice chimed. Edward held her in place as she slumped forward, losing the strength to keep herself upright.
This was the breakdown everyone had been waiting for, the breakdown Bella so desperately tried to keep at bay. Of course everyone had known she had cried once or twice, but they had been waiting for the realization of Charlie and Renée never returning to her life.
Edward didn't know exactly what to do with the sobbing teenage girl, but he did what his instincts told him. Edward pulled Bella to his chest and supported her weight as she slumped against him. His shirt beginning to get soaked with tears, Edward led Bella to her room. They sat down on her bed, Bella completely coming apart, screams almost escaping her lips. Edward's hands went up midair as Bella positioned herself to where her head rested in his lap, her eyes swollen shut as more tears escaped. He stayed in that position for several minutes before relaxing slightly, realizing that this small girl needed some sort of comfort. She needed reassurance.
Edward hadn't shown anyone anything remotely close to compassion in years after rebelling toward Carlisle for the choice he had made years ago without Edward's consent, but right now he knew that he had to let his walls down and calm Bella down before she hurt herself.
"Bella, you need to breathe. It's okay, you aren't alone. You're okay," one hand rested awkwardly on Bella's back, the other on her head. Her sobs were too loud to hear his whispered words. "Bella calm down. I know you're hurting, but you're okay. You're okay. You are okay."
Bella's hand fisted the fabric of his khakis, letting out a small scream, wishing nothing more than to get rid of this never ending pain. "Make it stop," she cried, her face contorted in misery. "Make it stop."
Edward felt as small as a dust particle that drifted through the light coming from the window. He couldn't help her; he had no idea what to do. "I don't know how," he responded, feeling like a dog who had been kicked in the stomach. "I'm sorry Bella."
His words didn't do anything for Bella as she let out more sobs, her free hand holding her stomach. She was going into hyperventilation, her breaths short and crisp. "Bella, please calm down. Please. Take three deep breaths, okay? Can you do that for me?"
Bella shook her head, the pain overwhelming her beyond the point of return. "Yes, you can, Bella! I need you to take three deep breaths all right?"
She shook her head once again, but listened, taking three deep breaths that choked her chest and burned the back of her throat, her body shaking. After getting herself under control, tears still falling from her eyes, Bella managed to calm herself into sleep, clutching Edward for dear life.
Edward looked down at the girl passed out in his lap. His shirt and pants were soaked with salty tears, his ears full of screams Bella had released before falling asleep. His hands absentmindedly stroked her hair and back, feeling the air enter and escape her lungs, knowing she was okay. Looking down at Bella, Edward knew that the outcome of helping this girl would end in a dramatical way that he wasn't sure if either of the two were ready for, but he knew that no matter what Bella threw at him, he would be there for her. Why? he had no idea, but Edward was damn sure he'd never let this pain consume her ever again.