This is my first story and I decided for it to be a Mai HiME fic. Hopefully you'll like it and I don't know I've read a lot of Shiznat fics and NatNao fics so I decided to leave this story open ended so I could get your responses of which you would like better. English is not my first language and reviews are much appreciated.Character may seem OOC if I decide to continue the story depends on the reviews.

Disclamer- Trust me NOT mine if it were ... Takeda would have had a painful death grin

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She was emotionally drained. Her mind was fighting her inner demons, she didn't know what to think after the carnival she had learned to forget and forgive. At first she thought nothing of what had happened was real, that Shizuru and her didn't die together, that all of what happened during the carnival was just a very bad dream. She eventually decided to forget and forgive; she knew that she had feeling for her after all she was her most precious person. With time she realized that she really loved shizuru and would do anything for her. But it was too late … shizuru had left; she had gotten tired of waiting for the words that would never come.

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-Flashback-

She had decided that today was going to be the day that she would tell Shizuru she loved her. She drove all the way to her apartment; after all it was movie night what a better moment to confess your love after a romantic movie. She entered the apartment with the spare key she had, it was empty. You could only see the sunlight filtering through the window and reflecting on the wooden table. Natsuki went further into the apartment and wondered where Shizuru was. She yelled her name a couple of times … nothing.

She was getting worried and she was about to call her when she saw the letter on the kitchen counter. She froze, all of her worst fears came to mind, she took it and read it. She could see her hand shaking, her tears where threatening to come out. She knew this was going to happen Shizuru couldn't wait forever.

"I thought she loved me and would always be by my side".

She read it again and again somehow she couldn't believe what she was reading.

My dear Natsuki:

I'm sorry for leaving you like this and for all the pain I put you through. You must know that I will always love you no mater where I am. I just couldn't take it anymore every time I saw you, every time I was near you, everything I put you through the pain I caused you made me want to go away and just let you be. I'm sorry Natsuki I really am but I have to let you go. I have come to realize that you will never be mine the way I want you to be.

Love Shizuru

Natsuki started sobbing uncontrollably; she fell to her knees just wondering why…

"Why!!!"

"I loved you, why did you leave me"

She realized that she was yelling into an empty apartment, and made her more furious she didn't want her to leave she wanted to hold her and never let her go.

Natsuki decided to get as far away as that place possible, she just wanted to forget again.

She didn't have any other place so she decided to drown her pain and sorrow in alcohol so she could just forget. She entered the bar and sat down; she ordered a beer and just drank.

"Why Shizuru after all we've been through, how could you do that?"

She sat there almost all night and had lost count of how many beers she had drunk. She was feeling drowsy and could barely stand up straight.

"Miss you alright"

"Yes perfectly fine" she slurred.

"Miss I can't allow you to leave like that"

"Leave me alone" Natsuki snapped

"Natsuki???" came the deep voice

"Reito?"

TBC...?