Interview's Wiff HP (ooter)
By: Emmettluver, Emmettluver's awesome cousin, and iggy's girlfriend.
Interview w/ harrrrrry poooooooooooter. Period. No joke. Pooter.
Note from Emmettluver: If you are like me, first of all I'll tell you that ND stands for Newspaper Dude. Second of all, I just want to tell you I am so, so sorry... :-)
Newspaper dude: "So, what do you think about being played by Dan Radcliffe?"
Harry: "What do I think of him…
I THINK &$$#&)&$# AND #$&$ AND (&$($&#& TOO!" Dangerously calm voice. "That's what I think of him". [panting
Newspaper dude: "All righty then, moving on… Do you have any pets?"
Harry: "Nope, she died..." leaps up "AND I SHOULD HAVE DIED! (falls over sobbing) THAT OWL WAS THE LOVE OF MY—MY LIFE! WHY? WHY? WHYYYYYYY!"
ND: "Um, well, sorry to bring up a sore subject… moving on, then?... Sir, uh, who are your closest friends? Any girls?" [winks
Harry: "NOOOOOOOOOOO[sob, sob YOU SAY YOUR SORRY TO BRING UP A SORE SUBJECT… BUT YOU JUST DID AGAIN!!!!! MY ONE AND ONLY TRUE FRIEND WAS… [SOB, SOB…. HEEEEEEEDDDDDDDWWWWIIIIIGGGG…. (and maybe Severus…)"
ND: "Uhhh…"
(suddenly Luna bursts in and starts singing)
Luna: "MAAAAAAAAAARRRRY HAD A LITTTTLE LAAAAAAAMB!!!!!! LITTTTTTLE LAMMMMBB….."
Harry: "Stuff it, Luna."
Luna: "HE FAAAAAALLLOWED HER TOO SCHOOOOOOL ONE DAAAY, SCHOOOOOL ONE DAY, SCHOOOOL ONE DAAAAYYY…"
Harry: "AVADA KEDAVRA!!!!!!!!!! blast of green light. Harry, in small sad voice. "Damn. Now I'm gonna be expelled… AND I'LL NEVER GET TO SEE HEDWIG'S GRAVE AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Luna[Coming back in spiritual form The enigma of past does no justice to the now, sweet. Pay the nargles the passing god; your husband will repay you.
Harry: "W...T...H???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????"
Luna: "All in the Prophecy of the Carlidown, my love. To be married on spring is to be washed with roses and puppy breath. I wish I were a fish. For then I could fly!"
Harry: small, kinda stunned voice "Boy Luna… I never noticed how beautiful…" (walks forward) "he is" (walks past her to a picture of Hermes on the wall).
Luna: "No time, no time, my younglings. Time to fly away, leave the nest; the baby's breath is growing, growing, growing… If only I could too, strapped like a duck, for all eternally. I shall haunt, but never hunt. Guns are dangerous; remember that. [she walks away, muttering about spiritual haunting of rhododendrons."
Harry: to ND "TALENTALEGRA!!!!!!! Okay, my work is done here…" (walks away)
ND: Wait, come back, this interview isn't over... [he dies
Harry: Now, to destroy the world...
Luna: Harry, why did you kill me?
Harry: AVADA KEDAVRA.
THE FREAKING END.