A/N: This is pure Marx free type. Another friendship fic because I had this floating in my head. How long did it actually take for Angela and Jane to clean Maura's closet out? Come on, my closet is not even that big.

Disclaimer: I don't own them because if I did, I would have Stanley fired already and Pike cleaning as a janitor.


The Closet

5:00pm

"Maura, you never even wore it," Jane argued with Maura. The medical examiner was looking up at the rows and rows and rows… (you get my point) of dresses and it seemed that that Maura would not give up anything. It was like pulling of a band-aid really slow…like really slow.

Maura glanced over her shoulder. "Jane, it is not easy and we do not have enough time," Maura retorted.

Jane sighed, lifting her boot cover foot onto the chair. "We have plenty of time! It's not like we are going anywhere because we just closed a case and also Cailin is here." She then pulled down a gray dress and held it up, "When was the last time you wore this?"

Maura scrunched her face. "Um…well…."

"Maura, if you lie, you get hives. Choose wisely."

"Just donate it," Maura huffed.

Jane smirked, tossing it into the donate pile, "See we are making excellent progress."


8:00pm

"Okay, when did you wear the red ones," Jane pointed toward a shelf.

Maura looked up, "Do you mean the rose red or the magenta red or-"

"The one's that look like blood," Jane quickly told her. She was not going to go through another lecture of the different shades each color had. It was already too much when it came to the black ones.

Maura frowned, "I wore them about a year ago."

"Are you going to ever wear them again?"

"Well…maybe…possibly…"

Jane sighed, rubbing her temples. "Let's simplify this a bit," she stated. "Are you going to wear them this month?"

"No…"

"Thought so. Come on, bring them down."

"But-"

"Maura, give me the bloody shoes!"


1:00 am

"Maura, it's official. We are going to have an intervention," Jane stated as she laid on the floor with Jo Friday resting on her stomach. Even Bass was next to her as she looked up at Maura who was going through her coats.

Maura stopped fingering through the coats. She gave a curious look, "I don't see why you need to have intervention. I'm not abusing any substance or doing anything harm-"

"You are a shopaholic," Jane pointed out.

"I am not."

"Yes you are! You have more clothes than I ever had in the last three years I was on the job and half of them, you never wore!" She sat up a bit, causing Jo Friday to get off her abdomen and run into the donation pile causing the clothes to spread all over the room. "Jo Friday! Get out of the clothes," Jane shouted.

"Oh, Jo Friday!"

Suddenly Jo Friday ran out of the closet with Maura chasing after her while Jane tried to stand up, "Stupid boot!"

"Jane, a bit of help would be acceptable now!"

"I'm coming! It's hard to do this without feeling like the Bionic woman!"

"Jane, you do not have-"

"I know!"


8:30 am

"Janie, Maura," Angela shouted as she entered the house. She looked down onto the floor to notice a white blouse on the floor. She picked it up then noticed a blue dress on the floor causing an eyebrow to fly up. She began to follow the trail collecting two green dresses, black slacks, and several more items before she reached the doorway of Maura's closet.

She looked down at her feet to see Bass covered in another pair of slacks. She picked it off the tortoise's shell before she peered inside. "Janie? Maura? Are you two in here," she questioned.

Angela suddenly heard a loud groan causing her to jump and she looked back inside to see Jane lying on the floor still with her hair tied back in a ponytail. She opened one of her eyes and looked up, "Ma, what do you want?"

"Janie, why are you on Maura's closet floor?"

Jane sat up, rubbing her eyes. "I've been here since yesterday, trying to help Maura clean out her closet," she informed.

Angela looked around seeing the mess on the ground. If Maura was helping, she would never leave such a mess especially her closet. "Where is Maura," Angela inquired.

"Over here, Angela." Angela walked further into the closet then looked around the corner to see Maura resting against one of the shelves with a gray skirt covered Jo Friday sitting in her lap.

Angela crossed her arms over her chest. "Should I clean this up while you two resume-"

"NO," both shouted causing Angela to jump.

Jane stood up, stretching a bit before she yawned loudly. "I'm going to go to the guest bedroom and take a nap if anyone needs me," she announced as she began to hobble over to the guest bedroom.

Maura stood up also and gave an unladylike yawn before she stated also, "I'm going to rest my eyes in my room. Angela, if you wish, you may clean up but please don't touch anything."

As she watched the two women leave the closet, Angela looked around before she looked at Jo Friday then at Bass. "It looks like it's just us for right now, guys," Angela stated while she began to clean. She picked up the skirt from Jo Friday's head then noticed a price tag that was still on it. She glanced at it before she gasped loudly, "Mary and Joseph!" Jo Friday gave a loud bark while Angela placed the skirt back on the shelf before she mumbled, "If Maura's planning to donate a $300 skirt to charity she might as well give it to me, Jo Friday."

All Jo Friday did was bark in agreement.


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