"Well I've been running from something, twenty years in my car. Down a road that's leading me nowhere...Do you want to see the place where I was free? Cause in my mind I need it, but you're nowhere near to me..."


He was crying, and there was no way to stop it. No way to stop the tears that ran down his face; no way to stop the gasping sobs that escaped his throat. Strong hands held his arms tightly, squeezing until he thought they would break. If he was lucky, maybe they would, and his blood would drench them, all of them, and stain them forever. The same way he was stained.

There was no way to clean this, was there? No way to clean himself. But if he survived this, if he somehow escaped this hell, then he would try. He would scrub himself until his body turned red and his eyes burned from soap. And then he would look in the mirror with pride.

But as fingers pulled his shirt up, revealing his pale skin, he knew that even after he cleaned himself, no matter how long he scrubbed, he would still be tainted. And he might never be clean again. But these people above him, surrounding him, they had been born dirty, and that was what separated him from them. He was better and stronger than them, because no matter what, they wouldn't break him. They couldn't, and no matter how tainted and destroyed he became, he would remain strong.

With a deep breath, he closed his eyes tight. In his mind, he imagined himself rising out of his body, laughing maniacally; his neck thrown back as he watched from above.

Who's weak now? Who's weak now…?

"Mark…" a voice softly whispered.

Luke blinked, dragged out of the dark corners of his mind. He looked up, finding himself staring at a shirtless man. He immediately panicked, wondering where he was, but with a quick scan he realized he was in this man's roomy car, spread out on the backseat.

With this understanding, the nights events came rushing back at him. He'd gone to a gay bar in hopes of getting drunk, and maybe even losing himself. For tonight, he had wanted to be anyone but Luke Snyder, and because of that, Luke Snyder had instantaneously became Just Mark.

Just Mark scarcely recalled dancing with a stranger. That dancing had escalated to intense kissing, tongues swirling together, and a hand shoved indiscreetly down his pants. He'd given this stranger a lap dance too, while hands groped at his ass. This was when things had lost all control. Those hands had pressed tight against him, snaking to the creak of his ass and sliding down until they touched Luke's hole. Luke had moaned desperately, and somehow, he had ended up in the bathroom, pressed against a stall; someone slamming into him repeatedly. He remembered sliding to the floor, and strong arms lifting him up until he felt like he was flying. Maybe it was around that time he had passed out. Maybe he had overdone it, and this man had been kind enough to take care of him, even bothering to check his body for…for…scars?

Or maybe, the man just wanted Mark for one night: tonight.

The man's fingers reached for him, and Luke instinctively flinched. The man straightened, and then leaned down until his lips brushed Luke's.

"It's alright, baby…" the man whispered while his fingers crept down Luke's chest, sliding until they touched Luke's jeans. His pants and shirt were quickly unbuttoned and removed, the man carelessly tossing them aside. Luke immediately covered his crotch, a deep blush warming his face. The man chuckled heartily.

"Baby, it's fine. I've seen all of you already…" His hands gently removed Luke's, lifting them to his lips. He kissed them once, twice, three times. "Let me see you here, where no one else can see." He leaned down again, licking his way up from Luke's stomach. He paused at Luke's neck, covering the area with miniscule bites and kisses. His fingers slid down again, tugging at Luke's underwear.

Luke gasped, and began thrashing wildly, hoping to escape the man's hold. He still felt slightly dizzy and weak from the alcohol, and he was having trouble concentrating. But despite all that, he needed more than anything to escape.

"Hey…cut it out, will ya?" The man held Luke tighter and pushed him down again, his lips molding over Luke's. When he pulled away, he let out a low grunt. "Don't forget who took care of you tonight. If it weren't for me…" he paused, and his fingers grabbed at Luke's ass. "If it weren't for me, this would probably be broken by now."

He kissed Luke again; forcing his tongue through Luke's closed mouth. And Luke felt his energy draining. The man slid Luke's underwear off and his fingers slid between Luke's cheeks. Luke began shaking involuntarily, and tears formed at the corner of his eyes.

"You feel it, baby?" The man glided down until his lips met Luke's cock. He kissed it softly, before engulfing it in his mouth. The man pressed two fingers against Luke's hole, easily sliding them in, and Luke felt tears slip from his eyes. He shut his eyes tight and allowed his mind to drift away; away to times of harsh guitar strumming and tender touches. He glanced out the car window, and noticed the star-less sky. Where had they gone, those skies that were covered with hundreds of blinking lights? Where had those moments gone? Were they truly gone, or were they still lying underneath Luke, underneath his scars and dirt that were still too stubborn to disappear?

He let out a sob, and the man stopped moving inside him. In the darkness of the night, Luke could make out the man's eyebrows crinkling in concern. "Baby, what's wrong?"

Luke shook his head feverishly, and covered his face with his hands. This moment, these unstoppable tears, his heavy heart; they all felt so familiar. But he didn't want them. He didn't want to remember.

He sobbed harder, and his fingers crawled around the man's neck. He just couldn't win. "I'm weak…" he whispered with a broken voice. "I'm weak, I'm weak…I—"

The man hushed Luke, pulling him up until he was seated in the man's lap. He kissed Luke's cheek, his eyelids, and finally his lips. And Luke let him.

He let the man kiss and hold him, let him thrust into his body. He let the man whisper words of endearment in his ear; let him lick the area around Luke's lips. Anything the man wanted, Luke consented, because this man, this man that had taken advantage of Luke in his fragile state; this man that had fucked Luke even when Luke hadn't wanted it.

He was somebody. And right now, all Luke needed was to feel he wasn't alone. Even if that meant dirtying himself, and spreading his legs as far as possible. He needed to feel. He needed to forget and erase those stubborn scars, once and for all.

He wrapped his legs tighter around the man's waist, and felt warmth fill him. The man grunted a few times and held Luke closer. Luke felt something fill his quivering hole, felt it slide down his legs, tickling his thighs.

Who's weak now? Who's weak now…?

Luke let out a bitter chuckle. Tears ran rapidly down his face, and he softly whispered.

"Still me."