Laurent bit Bella in the meadow. . .

Chapter 1

. . . . . I stared at him in horror.

He sniffed at the breeze that blew threads of my hair in his direction. "Mouthwatering," he repeated, inhaling deeply.

I tensed for the spring, my eyes squinting as I cringed away, and the sound of Edward's furious roar echoed distantly in the back of my head. His name burst through all the walls I'd built to contain it. Edward, Edward, Edward. I was going to die. It shouldn't matter if I thought of him now. Edward, I love you.

Through my narrowed eyes, I watched as Laurent bent down in to a low crouch, and then I closed my eyes; not wanting the last thing I should see alive is my killer's face. No, I closed my eyes and envisioned Edward; my subconscious had stored Edward away in flawless detail, saving him for this final moment. I could see his perfect face as if he were really there; the exact shade of his icy skin, the shape of his lips, the line of his jaw, the gold glinting in his furious eyes.

It was then at that moment, that I felt a sharp and intense pain slashing through my skin at the base of my throat. And I could feel cool icy lips sucking the life out of me.

The pain was so beyond anything I could use words to describe; I couldn't squirm or try to break free for he had me pinned down by his crushing weight (not that trying to fight him would have done me any good, I stood no chance). Yet as I started to drift out of consciousness and into my death, I felt a change.

I could no longer feel Laurent's deadly lips against my skin but I still could feel his weight pressing down onto me. And then I noticed a few things happen at once, but I was still not fully aware of what was happening - I was too weak to.

Just as sudden as Laurent's body was on top of me, it felt like he was gone. I could dimly hear a furious snarl and some wild growling. Not the same kind of growl that came from a vampire, this growling was closer to one a wild animal. A large wild animal. A vicious large wild animal. The new growling instantly became louder and sounded as if it was coming not from one wild beast but many.

As I began to ponder what this new terror could be, one that was freighting enough and strong enough to pull a very skilled terrifying vampire away from its prey while it was feeding, a new pain distracted me.

A pain as if someone was burning me.

At first the pain was so bad that I couldn't make sense of what was happening. My body rejected the pain, and I was sucked again and again into blackness that cut out whole seconds or even minutes of the agony.

Yet as I felt the flame ignite from my throat and head straight for my heart, I could once again hear strange voices. It was then that I realized that Laurent could not have killed me, not yet at least. None the less I was hurt, No! I was dying, because, the pain was too surreal for me to be just hurt. So I decided to open my eyes and find the source of these strange and yet somehow familiar voices.

When I opened my eyes, the sight that I saw was one that left me bewildered beyond my wildest dreams. I had opened my eyes only to look up into the face of Jacob Black. Jake? How could this be? Surely I was mistaken from earlier, and I have died and gone to heaven. There could be no other explanation, and yet even as I thought this through, I knew I was alive. For at that moment, the flame that was burning increased. The pain was like grabbing the wrong end of a curling iron but only it was worse, much, much worse.

I was still staring into Jacob's dark eyes as the burning grew, when I noticed Jake's lips were moving and I could not hear anything he said. I realized I couldn't hear him because, all I could hear was this loud ear splitting screech. As I tried to speak, to tell Jacob to stop the burning, no words would come out of my mouth. There was a simple explanation of this; of course, it was the source and reason of the high-pitched screeching I heard. The sound was me, screaming. I was in so much pain; no I was in complete and total agony.

I was burning; I was becoming a newborn vampire. Because Laurent had bit me, but he had not had the chance to finish killing me. Because something or someone must have stopped him, possibly scared him away (highly unlikely, but I was willing to bet anything was possible now). Thus my next questions are: 'But who?', 'And how?', 'And what about Jacob?'. As I looked up at Jacob's face I noticed that he was not alone.

Sam Uley, Embry, and a few other guys from La Push were standing behind Jacob. Again I tried to talk to Jake, to ask what happened and why he was here with the La Push "gang", but at that instant the burning grew again and rose and peaked until it surpassed anything I'd ever felt.

I had to close my eyes. The pain was so bad I forgot all about Laurent. I forgot all about Jacob. I forgot all about the guys from La Push. I forgot all about my piercing screams. All I could remember, all I could think about was the burning.

I felt the pulse behind the fire raging now in my chest and realized that it was the quickening beat of my heart; just in time to wish that I never had come to any realizations. I began to wish for and would have embraced the blackness of death from Laurent. I started to pray that Laurent would come back and finish me off once and for all. I wanted to raise my arms and claw my chest open and rip my heart from it, anything to get rid of the torture.

The pain of the glass cutting into my arms the night of my birthday party and the pain of my head hitting the asphalt as I crashed the motorcycle, both combined was nothing. Nothing at all to what I was feeling now. That was floating in a pool of cool water. I'd take it a thousand times. Take it and be grateful.

James snapping my leg under his foot. That was nothing. That was a soft place to rest on a feather bed. I'd take that now, a million times. A million snaps. I'd take it and be grateful.

The fire blazed hotter and I wanted to scream, maybe I already was, but I couldn't tell. I wanted to beg for someone to kill me now, before I lived one more second in this pain. Yet I couldn't, because there was a weight there, pressing on me.

It was as if the darkness was holding me down, so heavy. Burying me in the flames that were chewing their way out from my heart now, spreading with impossible pain through my shoulders and stomach, scalding their way up and down from my throat, and then licking at my face.

It was then I grasped that darkness was not holding me down; someone else was holding me back and I was still screaming. I then forced myself to stop screaming; I then realized that screaming would not help me. Nothing could help me now, so I assumed that it would be better to keep silent. I was convinced in trying to distract myself from the pain, even if only for a second or for just the smallest bit of relief.

At that instant all I wanted was to die. To never be born. The whole of my existence did not outweigh this pain. Wasn't worth living through it for one more heartbeat.

Let me die, let me die, let me die.

And for a never-ending space, that was all there was. Just the fiery torture, my soundless shrieks, and my pleading for death to come. Nothing else, not even time, so that made it infinite, with no beginning and no end. One infinite moment of pain.

The only change came when suddenly, impossibly, my pain was doubled. The lower half of my body was suddenly on fire, too.

The endless burn raged on.

It could have been seconds or days, weeks, or years, but, eventually, time came to mean something again.

Three things happened together, grew from each other so that I didn't know which came first: time restarted, the heavy weight was lifted, and I got stronger.

I could now remember why I didn't want to scream. I could remember the reason why I was enduring this unendurable agony. The reason why I was not dead, as I should be, but burning - becoming a newborn vampire.

This happened just in time for me to hold on when the pressure left my body. To anyone watching me, there would be no change. But for me, as I struggled to keep the screams and thrashing locked up inside my body, it felt like I'd gone from being tied to the stake as I burned, to gripping that stake to hold myself in the fire.

I had just enough strength lie there unmoving while I was charred alive.

My hearing got clearer and clearer, and I could count the frantic, pounding beats of my heart to mark the time.

I could count the shallow breaths that gasped through my teeth.

I could count the low but frantic hot breaths that came from somewhere beside me. The closest breath to me, felt as if it was coming from above me, and the more I focused on it, the more I began to realize that whoever was breathing above me, must be holding me. I could now feel someone's smooth but sweltering hot skin against my own. Whoever was holding me, was holding me close against them.

The person who was holding me was breathing at a more steady and even pace. I decided that I would count their breaths to keep track of time. This hot steady breath meant the most time passing. More than an even tick of a clock, the hot breath pulled me through the burning seconds towards the end.

I continued to get stronger, my thoughts clearer. When noises came, I could listen.

The other hot and frantic breath soon became steady and even just as the breathing coming from so close to me. Suddenly I could smell this awful smell that made nose wrinkle, the scent oddly reminded me of a wet dog. As I slowly grew slightly use to the smell, I could her lithe footsteps approaching me. I then felt a slight pressure against the inside of my wrist. The fingers that were touching me were sweltering hot.

"Shouldn't there be a change by now?" an unfamiliar male voice spoke from beside me.

"I don't know; he said this could take three to 4 days, maybe more maybe less." The voice that spoke this was one that I recognized, it was my Jacob.

"But she isn't even moving."

"I Know. Listen to her heart, it's beating faster."

"Maybe we were too late. Maybe she is just dying…"

"No! SHUT UP! We were NOT too late!" it seemed like it took everything in Jacob to not shout these last words at the top of his lungs. Then more gently and lower Jake spoke again, "Bella? Can you hear me?".

I knew, beyond all doubt, that if I unlocked my teeth I would lose it; I would shriek and screech and writhe and thrash. If I opened my eyes, if I so much as twitched a finger, or any change at all would be the end of my control.

Jacob still speaking softly, "Bella? If you can hear me open your eyes or squeeze my hand, or shoot just give me some sign."

He was then holding my hand lightly in his hot hand. It was hard not to answer him, but I stayed paralyzed. Even when I could hear the desperate plea in his voice; I knew this was hurting him, but I also knew I would hurt him more if he knew I was suffering in any way.

"Jake, Dude, she's still not moving…"

"She'll be fine!", Jake practically growled out the words.

Yes, I was right to keep quiet. He didn't need to suffer with me.

I felt a faint hot pressure inside the crease of my elbow. Then Jacob's broken whisper, "Bella, I'm sorry. We shouldn't have waited…but don't worry the blood sucker is gone and he'll never hurt you or anyone else again."

I wanted so much to be able to speak to him. To ask him what he was sorry for, none of this was his fault. I didn't want him feeling guilty, this was my entire fault, and I just wished I could have let him known that, but that will have to wait. As will the other million of questions I have for him. For example: what did Jacob mean when he said, `the blood sucker is gone…'. There's no possible way Jake meant Laurent was dead. Vampires are indestructible except maybe at the hands of another vampire. There was no logical explanation, there was no way that this could ever be true. Could there?

Through all this, the raging fire went on burning me. But there was so much space in my head now. Room to ponder their conversation, room to remember what had happened to put me here, room to look ahead to the future (a dark future), and with still endless room left over to suffer in.

Also room to worry.

If I was turning into a newborn vampire then surely, Jake and whoever was with him was in danger. Yes, they were in grave danger, from me.

Edward would never tell me much about newborn vampires, but from what he had said was enough to make it very clear that newborns were extremely dangerous in every worse way possible. Newborns were supposed to be super strong, have short tempers, and most of all they were ALWAYS thirsty.

If being constantly thirsty was going to be my strongest personal trait as a newborn, then I want to be and should be, as far away as possible from any humans. Especially the ones I knew and cared about. If I ended up hurting Jake or anyone else, how could I live with myself?

I had been dreaming of being a newborn vampire in my days with Edward. Yet in those dreams, I was a good a vampire, a "vegetarian", I was just like the rest of the Cullens.

Although the Cullens are gone from my life, that does not mean I have to give into temptation. That does not mean I have to become a killer. If Carlisle fought temptation for more then 300 years now, then certainly I can follow his footsteps and do the same. In fact I swear to myself that I will never bite or kill any human. I am going to be a good vampire, no matter what it takes.

Just then the strange male voice spoke calmly but with a small hint of sadness in his tone, "Jake, what about the pack? Aren't you worried about them at all?"

"The pack isn't big enough to spread out this far, especially since we left." Jake's tone of voice had a small ring of authority to it.

I was very confused by the turn of the conversation. What did they mean by "the pack" and who was this boy with Jake? As I tried to wrap my head around this bit of information, I got a new symptom. Guilt. I felt guilty for dragging Jacob into the world of the supernatural, a world that he was not suppose know anything about. Yet the more I listened to them talk the more it seemed like Jacob already knew about this supernatural world. It was also clear that he was keeping a secret from me. A secret that I would find out first chance I got! A secret that Billy Black had to be in on, yet it was Billy himself who said Jake was suppose to be in Port Angeles with friends for the day. Still, here was Jake and some kid waiting around for me to come to and be a vampire. Ugh! I was like the plague. I should be quarantined.

Suddenly I could hear the unknown boy walk to other side of my body. By this point I was extremely frustrated, and their conversation seemed to have come to a close for the time being. As I was listening and hoping for further explanations, I began to wonder if they were talking so mysteriously just to annoy me?

So I went back to counting Jacob's breaths to mark the time.

Ten thousand, nine hundred forty-three breaths later, they started another conversation.

"Hey man. How much longer do you think we got to wait?"

Jacob sighed and then answered, "It can't be too much longer, it's already been two days."

"Yo, you spouse she's gonna be alright?", the boy asked fully concerned.

"Sure, sure."

"Really? You weren't so sanguine two days ago."

Jake replied in a voice that showed that he was about too lose his calm again, "That's because two days ago we had to leave the pack in order to protect her. I don't care what Sam says, no matter if Bella turns into a blood sucker or not, I can not and will not let anything happen to her." Jake said the last part more vehemently then the rest.

"Yeah I agreed remember? Calm down will ya? Anyways it still can't be too much longer; look how pretty she looks, the smell is starting to get awful, and look how…pale she is…." The unknown boy trailed off as he spoke.

Jacob didn't answer, but the strange boy's words gave me hope that maybe I didn't resemble the charcoal briquette I felt like. It seemed to me as if I must be just a pile of charred bones by now. Every cell in my body had been razed to ash.

I began to wonder, how many more seconds would I burn? Ten thousand? Twenty? Another day-eighty six thousand, four hundred? More than that?

I then realized that I could hear and smell everything. I could hear the swish of fabric as they shifted and moved beside me. It seemed like I could hear every living creature in a three-mile radius. Not to mention the smells, although the wet dog smell was still strong, I could smell every tree, leaf, and all the little forest animals close by. It was then that it finally dawned on me, we must still be outside, the sounds and smells were far too strong for us not to be. But I didn't find any of this interesting enough to distract me from the pain, so I listened to Jacob's breathing again, counting the seconds.

Twenty-one thousand, nine hundred seventeen and a half seconds later, the pain changed.

On the good-news side of things, the fire started to fade from my fingertips and toes. Fading slowly, but at least it was doing something new. This had to be it. The pain was on its way out. . . .

And then the bad news: The fire inside my heart got hotter.

How was that possible?

My heartbeat, already too fast, picked up-the fire drove its rhythm to a new frantic pace.

The fire retreated from my palms, leaving them blissfully pain free and cool. But it retreated to my heart, which blazed hot as the sun and beat at a furious new speed.

The unknown male and Jacob were now pacing beside me. Their footsteps were so distinct; I could even tell that Jacob was on my right and the strange boy pacing to the left.

"Listen," Jake told him. "It's almost over…. I think."

The excruciating pain in my heart overshadowed my relief at his words.

My wrists were free, though, and my ankles. The fire was totally extinguished there.

It was then when my fingers twitched, for the briefest moment, that I almost lost complete control on my perfect façade. Jacob and the boy were silent except for the jack hammering of my heart and now the slightly quickened beats of theirs. I suppose their hearts now reacted to the pace of mine.

A sweltering hot hand then squeezed my wayward fingers. "Bella? Can you hear me?"

Could I answer him without screaming? I considered that for a moment, and then the fire ripped hotter still through my chest, draining in from my elbows and knees. Better not chance it.

"You better get into position.", Jake spoke to the boy in a very commanding voice.

And then- OH!

My heart took off, beating like helicopter blades, the sound almost a single sustained note; it felt like it would grind through my ribs. The fire flared up in the center of my chest, sucking the remnants of the flames from the rest of my body to fuel the most scorching blaze yet. The pain was enough to stun me, to break through my iron grip on the stake. My back arched, bowed as if the fire was dragging me upward by my heart.

I allowed no other piece of my body to break rank as my torso slumped back to the ground.

It became a battle inside me-my sprinting heart racing against the attacking fire. Both were losing. The fire was doomed, having consumed everything that was combustible; my heart galloped toward its last beat.

The fire constricted, concentrating inside that one remaining human organ with a final, unbearable surge. The surge was answered by a deep, hallow sounding thud. My heart stuttered twice, and then quietly thudded again just once more.

The only sound was the outdoors and their frantic heartbeats. No one was breathing. Not even me.

For a moment, the absence of pain was all I could comprehend. And then I opened my eyes and gazed above me in wonder.