Percy Jackson doesn't want anything more to do with the world he saved at a price too high. His wife muses on what her husband cries about. ONESHOT.

Percy is a bit OOC. And this IS Percabeth, in a sense, so don't freak on me, kay? Rated T for suicide.

Midnight Musings

Miranda loves him, she doesn't deny that that She misses him. Sometimes, though, she wishes she never met Percy Jackson. She can remember that day better then yesterday. He was a struggling Oceanology major, handsome and affectionate. She didn't even notice his distance. Some days he'd look at her as if she was someone else, a desiring look that made her wonder if he was cheating. He couldn't be though, he was too faithful, almost to a fault. His smile was small and sad, but she wouldn't have it any other way. She waited a long time for him to ask, and she said yes immediately. She shed the name Curran, and traded it for the much more common Jackson. A new husband, a new house and even a new name. Almost like a new life. But he obviously didn't feel that way. He'd wake up crying all through out their first year of marriage. She dealt with it patiently, telling herself that he had been a soldier in the army before they had met. How could she know that was a lie? He was a soldier, just not for the US army. For another one entirely.

When their first child is born he is gone for the birth, out drinking or something. She cries, thinking about leaving him but then she looks at the baby, with his sea green eyes and can't. For better or for worse she'd stay by his side. When he comes back he barely looks after the baby, the little boy with her brown hair and green eyes. He looks at him as if blaming someone for the fact that the baby has her nose and hair. She tries to get him to say something. She considers names and decides to suggest one.

"How about Luke, isn't that a lovely name?"she asks softly, placing a hand on his shoulder. He turns to face her faster then she thought possible. He looks livid. She backs away, wondering what she did wrong. His eyes look utterly reproachful, and he seems about to hit her. She flinches, ready for impact. Instead he breaks down and sobs, clenching his fists.

"No, I'll never name my son after that monster. Never, do you hear? He killed them Mandy. Oh gods, he killed them."she is speechless, her slim, tan arms close around her baby, worried. She has always wondered why he said gods, plural. He was, as far as she knew, not of a polytheistic religion, or any religion at all. And then there is the matter of this 'Luke' What was he talking about? She asks him this and he shakes his head "Never mind. Forget what I said."

They settle on Charlie, though he still doesn't like it. She doesn't really care though, she loves the baby. Little Charlie, growing up every day. Over the next three years Percy, however, just seems to get worse. He is out drinking more often, he be gone for days at a time, brought home by the police. Never once does he hit her though, and so she stays.

The first time it snows that winter he sits outside on the porch, watching each snowflake. He turns to her, and tells her it is December 22nd, the first day of Winter. She nods, and he turns from her, closing his eyes and muttering something. He is praying.

On the Christmas after Charlie's fifth birthday though, she hears a name pass by his lips as he sleeps.

"Annabeth." It's barely more then a whisper, but he says it with such emotion she cries. He has to be cheating. She wonders when exactly he stopped loving her, if he ever had. She asks him about it the next day but he just goes silent and says. "She was a friend." Miranda doesn't believe him, but he looks so sad she doesn't push it.

On New Years day a man comes to see him. He smiles at her and asks if this is the Jackson residence. She stammers when she answers that yes, yes it is. He smiles again and sweeps past her. She is struck by his appearance. Tall, thin and pale his black hair contrasting with his almost white skin. Draped entirely in black clothing he looks intimidating. And those eyes. Deep and obsidian. He asks her her name politely. She answers and he inquires if Percy is home. She nods and points up the stairs, but her husband is already coming down. He looks shocked and the man breathes out. Silence reigns for a while.

"I told you not to come." Percy says. The man shrugs.

"I have a right to see family don't I?" Percy laughs for the first time in a long time. He walks forward and pulls the man into a hug. The tall man looks surprised at the reaction, but returns the hug. Percy pulls away and tries to smile. He's out of practice. She gives him a questioning look and he remembers to introduce them.

"This is Nico di Angelo. Nico this is Miranda, my wife." Nico raises his eyebrows, and lowers his voice. Unfortunately she has good ears. "I thought you said no one after her?" he asks. Percy's eyes darken. He defends himself with:

"She's special." Nico smiles and pats him on the back.

"Good, glad you were able to move on." he says. Percy just nods, as if distracted. Annabeth, that must be who they are talking about. She doesn't know who she is (or was) but she has a feeling he never did move on.

They sit and talk, inculding her. She learns that he is his cousin, that he hasn't seen in many years. She expects them to have a lot to catch up on, but all he says is a mention of Charlie and a bit about work. Nico says close to nothing. She wonders why they don't talk about their family members. At midnight he rises from his chair, wishes them a happy new year and leaves. After that he looks happier and sadder then she's ever seen him. He gets up, giving her a quick kiss goodnight.

She doesn't realize it's a kiss goodbye. When she finally does make it upstairs she screams and cries louder then she ever has. He is already dying when she finds him, the gun still in his hands. She yells at him for being so stupid, but it's only because she's afraid she'll loose him. He aimed the bullet well, so it found his heart. He gasps for air and pushes the note towards her. She picks it up and reads it quickly, it's covered in his scarlet blood. She drops it and looks at him, heartbroken that he would lie to her as he dies. But he seems to know what she's thinking and tells her it's real with his last breath. She reads it over, and cries, smudging the ink.

She can't believe it, but she calls Nico's number before the funeral. He doesn't seem surprised and confirms the entire letter. He is the son of Hades after all, he knew the second Percy's string snapped. He asks if he can bring some of his family to the funeral and she agrees. He brings three people in the end. A tall man that looks so much like Percy she cries, a man with curly red brown hair and a top hat, and a girl with blue eyes, black hair and a silver jacket. They are Poseidon, Percy's father as well as god of the sea, Grover, his best friend and Thalia, daughter of Zeus, his cousin. They stand for the funeral and Grover takes out something before they burn the body away. A deep blue green shroud. It has a burn mark, as if someone had tried to burn it already. Grover explains that Annabeth had thought him dead and had begun to burn it before he came back.

She'll never get used to the world he hid from her, but she loved Percy Jackson until the end, as he had loved this girl who had died, killed by a man named Luke. She shudders and thanks the gods she didn't name Charlie that. She holds her little boy tightly, and he looks at her with his green eyes, so much like his fathers.

I was bored, does that explain it? Miranda is a OC that I made up, and yes, she's a mortal. I don't usually like OCs but I wanted to write something like this. Skips around a lot, I know. Sorry about that.