Prologue: The Embittered Chambers Of Regret
The Parlor,The Potter Residence, Godric's Hollow, Wizarding World...
Steam had still been coming out of the top of the small muggle white china tea cup beautifully decorated with the most exquisite muggle penmanship in terms of air brush design. The blue swirls or ink that lined the fat sides of the cup seemed to melt perfectly into the milky white surface. The slightly trembling yet delicate feminine hands of one Lilian Louise Potter, formerly Lily Evans, as she took her cup and saucer from her second most dearest friend.
The saddened woman of thirty-one years had been a mess in the company of her guest, although it wasn't due to her own design. The years of toiling away as a less than appreciated trophy wife of a Quidditch star and mother of two had been less than exceptional on her part especially in the wake of her losing her most recent pregnancy in the form of a miscarriage following a confrontation with a young witch claiming to have been intimate with her famous husband.
The bags beneath her emerald green eyes had only seemed to double in size with each passing day. The smile she once wore that had been something of a glimpse of Helen Of Troy in the eyes of her former best friend had faded replaced by frown lines and internal bitterness in the wake of her previous life choices.
The long flowing locks of fiery red had been simple strands of complication atop her stress riddled head, so long gone were the days of adventure and inspiration from youth when she set out from the muggle world to carve her path in the glorious heights of the wizarding society and legend.
"You've been crying again." said the soft and concerned voice of a rather sheepish looking wizard with predatory eyes and an expression of hollowed sadness rivaling her own.
"Suppose that's all I've been doing these days." she said attempting to make light of the situation but failing rather miserably.
"You mustn't be too hard on yourself." he said knowing all too well what the pangs of regret felt like when being drowned by dark thoughts in the wake of a tragic circumstance.
"Why shouldn't I?" asked Lily with a sigh. "This mess is my own damn fault if I hadn't..."
The accompanying wizard arched an eyebrow as his caught sight of a new series of books stacked on the coffee table.
"Would your new found attitude about the way your life has taken a turn have anything to do with these?" he asked leaning toward the coffee table and picking up one of the volumes books stacked upon it. "To Bewitch The Mind And Ensnare The Senses: A Potions Master's Guide To The Natural World, By Severus S. Snape P.M."
The seemingly exhausted woman sighed taking the book from her guest's hand and ran her fingers along the gold plated lettering. There was a far off look in her eyes as if she were traveling to another place in time for a few moments.
"You know he's something of a recluse." said her guest understanding just where her mind had taken her. "I doubt he speaks to anyone outside his business contacts these days."
"I don't blame him." sighed the saddened woman still running her fingers across the book's lettering. "He wasn't much for...social interaction to begin with."
"Is that why you were his only friend?" asked her guest.
Tears seemed to swell in the corners of the saddened woman's emerald green eyes. There had been so much pain and regret behind them in the recent years she didn't know where to begin when allowing it all to manifest as tears and cascade down her cheeks.
"What I did to him...what we all did to him was the worst thing anyone could have done to him." she began as more tears continued to fall in the wake of her sorrow.
The sheepish guest sighed thinking back to those days as well.
"You know I went to speak with him...after...I wasn't sure he'd survive the summer but he managed...even became a Potions Master writing his own books." he said. "It was a difficult time then...we thought we had all the answers...hell were just children...foolish..."
"Cruel." she added recalling the aspect of her younger-self. "I was deliberately cruel to him...and I've spent years regretting my actions then."
"I'm sure he knows you didn't mean it." said the guest trying to reassure her.
"That's kind of you to say." she replied knowing full well how she treated him in the past. "But we both know it isn't true."
With a sigh, she turned her attention back to her tea.
"Lily." said her guest with a rather sorrowful expression filed across his face. "We've all made mistakes concerning Severus."
"Some greater than others, Remus." she replied still saddened by her past actions.
The emerald green eyes of Lily Potter stared down at the name of her former best friend written on the book she grasped ever so tightly in her unwavering hand. He had been her first love and best friend when they were children, it was staggering when one noted the amount of distance that had been placed between them in recent years due to conflicting choices made in life.
Lily had chosen to marry James Potter and subsequently cut all ties with Severus in a bid to appease the more handsome, and substantially wealthy Pureblood wizard. In the process, she broke her best friend's heart and turned her back on him. Perhaps, the most surprising aspect of her terrible actions against him in their youth, she had sided with the very group of students whom she knew to have been terrorizing him the moment they got on the Hogwarts Express.
The bitter memories of their final conversation came flooding back and if it weren't for his accomplishments in the wizarding world after leaving Hogwarts, she would have believed Severus Snape had perished a long time ago, his self-destructive behavior and under-aged drinking had been cause for concern but not enough to warrant her to apologize then despite seeing the damage she caused.
The thoughts of the young emotionally fragile wizard had haunted her for years since she turned her back on him it even caused her to second guess her own choices now and again, of course losing this baby in the wake of discovering her husband's infidelity was more or less the reason behind such thinking.
As the what if's continued to make themselves known, Lily's mind took her back to a time when life had been simple and there was a world of endless possibility stretched out before her and she had only needed to chase after her dream in order to pursue it. The first step in getting to that world had been through Hogwarts Castle, and Severus Snape had been right there with her.
Her best friend.
Her guide.
Her love since she had been a child despite her keeping their relationship a secret from her Gryffindor friends.