He stands there by the waterfront, tossing stones into the sea.
Ruby shuffles closer. Her hands are folded timidly over her waist while she struggles to raise her head from the weight of the point she wishes to express. Her cloak bristles loudly in the northern Mistrali breeze while she lets out a soft squeak after a leaf briefly scrapes against her cheek.
He doesn't seem to hear her.
Step by step. She inches closer.
Plop, plop, splash. Another pebble sinks to the seabed.
Ruby breathes deep. The tornado in her mind dies down. She clasps her hands together. The thumping in her chest drops. This needed to be said. She needed to confront it. There were options but among them, this one was the least painful way to move forward in the face of overwhelming adversity.
He stoops down, cups a stone, and whips it into the water. Plop, plop, splash.
She bites her lip.
"Jaune?"
He stops. And turns around. His face brightens in surprise. His golden tuft bristles with the Animan breeze. Piercing blue sapphires—those same orbs she saw more often than before—regard her curiously. His lips move and she hears him faintly.
Ruby finds it hard to breathe. This was harder than she thought. All confidence, all strength vaporized by an innocent glance from her...best friend.
His lips move again and this time, she registers.
"Ruby? You okay?"
She squeaks. "I'm fine!"
"Um, okay," he answers unevenly. He regards her more with concern. "Is there something on your mind?"
There were many things. Too many things. Too great. Too much. Too hard for her to vocalize in the less than three sentences Weiss had drilled her into practicing. This was beyond the romantic fantasies of Blake's books or the flirtatious insight offered by Yang's experience. Not even the unspoken bond between Ren and Nora could somehow explain to the young reaper how to go about this.
Might as well start with something. Small talk, yeah. That should get the ball rolling. With an awkward cough, she blurts out, "That was some kind of Grimm, huh."
Jaune agrees with her with a mirthful huff. "Yeah, it sure was. Thought we screwed up big time with Cordovin and all."
She shuffles her boot against the concrete. "Yeah, that was a mental breakdown."
"Surprised she got herself back together after that." He rubs the back of his head as he lets out a weak chuckle. "Never was able to say this back then because of all the Grimm but you did an amazing job. Couldn't have saved the day without you, heh."
Her heart flutters but she bites it down. She beams up at his compliment though. "Thanks. You too."
"Hey, I did my part," he shrugs.
"You helped a lot," she demurs.
"Everybody had their parts. Great teamwork and, well, like that one guy in B-Team said."
Ruby grins at the hint of the coming punchline. She stares up at him as he silently conveys the countdown. Three, two, one:
"I love it when a plan comes together."
They both laugh at their silliness, their voices having blended perfectly together. It warms her heart seeing how upbeat he is. She regains herself and quickly her mirth subsides, replaced by the point of her approaching him out here tonight. Her words are scrambled in her head and she glances away to get them in order.
"So...that was a thing," Jaune says, trying to keep the ball rolling.
Ruby hums back. She clears her throat yet cannot meet him the eye. Gods, why did this have to be so difficult? "Hey, uh, I need to talk to you about...some things."
"Okay," he grunts. "What is it?"
She struggles to find the words she memorized before. Ruby straightens the hem of her skirt and fiddles with the frays in her cloak until she mutters, "Me and you."
"What?"
An iota of confidence wells up inside her. "Me and you."
"What do you mean? Me and you?"
She looks up at him square at his pupils. "Me and you, Jaune. We need to talk it out."
For the first time in a long time, he flinches at her voice. Surprise caves in to fear then hesitation. He settles into an apprehensive mien as he adjusts himself against the balustrade. For a moment, it seems as though he knew exactly what she was going to say. Though that could be her mind playing with her wayward emotions again.
As it always had since they set out together those many months ago.
"Wha...what needs t-to be, uh, discussed?"
Ruby catches the struggle in his words and tries to see through him. His fear. His anxiety. His insecurities. Who he was and is now. And who will be when the times come to shear them bare.
"I've noticed," she starts. "It wasn't obvious at first. Probably because we both couldn't tell. But recently, I..."
She breathes deep to slow the drums in her heart.
"...I noticed what's going on. And I don't know what's going on."
Silence. She looks up to see him tightlipped and staring. He seems unsure.
Ruby bites her lip and continues. "The way you look at me sometimes. I noticed. Whenever we were camping out or lodging at the places we've passed by, you were there helping me get used to being on the road... You were always giving hints when I was learning to cook, you always went shopping with me, you... You were always beside me. You held my hand...and I held yours. It felt so natural. Then...you and I, we...held each other more and more. It felt weird but great..."
"Ruby, I..."
She stops. And waits. And listens.
But he stutters. And bites his tongue. Jaune stands there, sputtering air until he gives up and says, "Yeah. I noticed, too. Was I that obvious?"
"Well...you cried for me."
He blinks in surprise. "What? I—"
She shakes her head. "You cried for me. You were happy for me when we got back together from the train. You really, really cared. And I...I felt so happy and glad and, and..."
Something trickles down her cheeks. She wipes her whole face with her sleeve.
"...I'm so happy you cared for me. I'm glad you were there waiting for me. I..."
Cold steel brushes against her skin. The feel of the metal shocks her back to him only to catch his smile hovering down at her. Something glistens in his eyes over the curve of his lips. He rubs away the last of her tears and rests his gauntleted hand on her shoulder.
"I always was. I always am," he tells her. "You kept your promise. That means a lot to me."
She smiles. Only briefly. Then she asks, "What does that make us?"
He opens his mouth to give the automatic answer. Suddenly, he stops. His jaw clamps shut and his smile vanishes. His hand slips away as he glances at the sidewalk. He searches for answers among the cobblestones as she searches his for a hint.
Catching none, Ruby steels herself. Her fists tighten and she stiffens. Her throat is tight but her voice carries through. "We can't just be friends, Jaune."
Now he chokes. "Wh-what do you mean? Wh-why—"
"I feel like we could be something more."
He stops. He studies her.
"But I don't think now is a good time. And I'm not sure if things will work out the way I want—no." She shakes her head. "The way it's supposed to go."
He grabs her arms and stoops close to her face. "Ruby, what are you saying?"
She reaches up and cups his elbows. "I want to be more than friends, Jaune! I want to be more than that. But I don't know if I really want to...and I don't want to force you if you don't feel the same way."
There! She said it. She said her peace. Now smite her.
Ruby stands there, keeping false interest with the concrete. She knows what they are. She knows the risks of going ahead with this and how much she would lose if this goes the other way. So the reaper waits in front of him, unable to meet his gaze while she feels his fingers slip off her arms.
"... Ruby," Jaune croaks. "You mean so much to me. I guess I was right about myself being too obvious and all that."
She chuckles for some reason. He does to.
"... Honestly, I..." He struggles to speak. "...I can't help myself. You're amazing for you. I can't... The truth is... I want to be closer to you."
The reaper looks up to the knight. He wanted to be closer to her? He feels the same way? He had to, right? She searches his face for an answer, instead finding him sharing her confusion, her yearning, her indecision. She holds his hands. "We can be more than friends."
His fingers wrap around hers. "Then what's stopping you?"
Ruby lets out a pained sigh. "Saving the world."
Jaune deflates. But he still holds onto her. "Can't both go hand in hand?"
"I...I don't think they can." She breathes into his palms. Then leans into him. "Not with the way things are. Salem will use everything in her power to stop us. Destroy us. And...and if she can't destroy us, she can break us."
Ruby did not need to say exactly how. Jaune knows. They both understood.
The haunting memory of a burning javelin spearing through Weiss was more than enough.
He wraps his arms around her and pulls her in. She completes the circle, tugging tight at his waist. The two of them stand there within each other, listening to the seagulls squawk over the waves lapping at the city's waterfront.
It feels good. It feels right. It feels...too early, too soon, too much for where they were at in this point in their adventure. Or whatever it was that their lives had spiraled into.
They can be more. But could she truly spend that future with him? Caring for him? A family? Offspring? It was hard to imagine. Hard to stomach, maybe. She was happy how they were. How he stood by her side, how he complimented her for her quirks, how he was one of the very few people who actually understood her for her.
Jaune was her...best friend. As she was to him. However, that could change. Perhaps not now, not tonight, not anytime soon. Things may drive them apart but they could never stay that way for long. They could grow closer but can they go beyond that line?
"I'm happy with the way we are," she says into his shoulder.
"Me too," he mumbles over her hair.
"I want to try being more."
"Me too."
"But I don't think now is the time."
"Yeah, I think so too."
They let go. Ruby smiles warmly at him partially to hide her prevailing indecision. "Yeah. We'll cross that bridge when we get there, huh. Until then..."
Jaune beams at her though a bit of sadness trickles through. "... Until then, we're best friends."
He releases her fingers from her palm. They peer back at the sea now darkened with the onset of evening. A moment later, the street lamps flicker to life across the waterfront. It is time to head back to prepare for their departure for Atlas tomorrow.
Ruby sees Jaune glancing down her hip. She makes no effort to hide her hands, swaying back and forth with each step. He decides against holding hers. Side by side, they walk back to the apartment in downtown Argus under the glittering starlit sky. They savor the wordless stroll knowing that tomorrow, they would be in Atlas where moments such as these would be rarer.
ORIGINALLY DRAFTED: April 16, 2019
LAST EDITED: April 22, 2019
INITIALLY UPLOADED: April 22, 2019
Nine Days Of Lancaster theme: 'Best friends first, lovers later'