If Wishes Were Horses

Category: Drama/Angst

Pairing: Hameron, House/Cameron

Summary: Cameron is struck down by a mysterious illness and House struggles to deal with his emotions, as well as his inability to diagnose her.

Warnings: One for an adult situation, a lot later in the story. If I don't chicken out of posting it :P For now i'll keep the rating at M just in case.

Disclaimer: Own nothing, nudda, zip!

Author's Notes: This is set sometime before the end of season five, includes mention of Amber but dismisses the final. For everyone who read my last fic Divide by Zero, this isn't a sequel nor is in any way related. Time for something fresh!

The cafeteria was abuzz with people collecting their lunch and Cameron sighed, staring at her own food with disdain. Not only did the sight make her want to gag but it seemed to aggravate the loud pounding in her head, causing her to wince. Everything hurt. Her chest, her throat... all in all, she felt like hell.

Feeling a tickle, she clenched her eyes shut as a sneeze shot out forcefully, followed by another and another...

Sniffing slightly, she wiped her hand along her scrubs, taking hold of her water bottle. It was an effort to get it open but she finally managed, downing the liquid and trying not to flinch as it came into contact with her raw throat.

Forcing down a few more sips, she recapped the lid throwing her head back and willing the ache in her muscles to subside. God she hated being sick.

With another sigh she reluctantly sat up, throwing one more distasteful glare towards the salad that remained uneaten on her plate. Stomaching anything seemed all most impossible, but the doctor inside her knew the importance of staying hydrated and nourished, so she reluctantly picked up her fork and began stabbing at the leaves.

'Still not feeling better?'

Chase dropped his tray on the table and she snapped out of her daze, swallowing the nausea that rose in her throat as she shook her head.

'You should go home.' Taking a handful of chips, he raised an eyebrow concerned by the way she paled at the sight of his food, 'Seriously, you don't look so good.'

'I'm fine, it's just a cold.' She offered a small smile, dismissing the suggestion. Even though curling up in bed and sleeping it off sounded appealing, her shift was due to end in a little under two hours and she was determined to see it through. 'I'm out at three-thirty anyway.'

He nodded, recognizing the stubborn set of her voice. He'd been caught on the receiving end of that tone enough times to know there was not point arguing, however that didn't mean he couldn't try and subtlety persuade her.

'Okay, but if you need a lift or anything let me know. You need to rest up for the charity dinner in a few weeks.' He dug into his food, pretending not to remember how much she was secretly looking forward to the event. In truth, he was too. It was nice to get out once in a while, share drinks with his fellow colleagues.

Watching him scoff down his lunch, Cameron silently cursed remembering she'd forgotten to pick up her dress from the dry cleaners. She was meant to get it yesterday but being sick the task had completely slipped her mind.

Dropping her fork to the table, she rubbed the back of her neck resigned to the fact that attempting to do anything productive this week was pointless.

Chase looked up at the noise and she caught his gaze silently thanking him for the reminder and the offer to take her home. Though she doubted she would take him up on it, it was still a nice gesture given everything they'd been through the past couple of months.

'You think this is weird-' he took a sip from his drink as if reading her thoughts, 'I mean it's not that I don't like it, but this is weird right? Given that we just broke up.'

Considering the statement, she fiddled idly with the label on her water bottle. Maybe eating lunch together should have been weird but it wasn't. They'd separated nearly a month ago and the fact they managed to remain friendly was just another reason she'd mentally added to the list of reasons why they would have never work out.

She was comfortable with him, loved him, but there was something missing... even the way they'd ended it; with a 2am agreement that they lacked a certain amount of chemistry, had been somewhat surreal. They had great sex, understood each other but he wanted her to be happy not just content. In his own words, there was a difference between being glad to see someone or feeling your heart flutter at the mere mention of them.

It reminded her of the time Foreman had asked whether or not she got butterflies around her then boss.

Frowning slightly at the thought, she sat up a little straighter in her chair, 'It's not weird.' she decided, deliberately pulling her mind away from House. That ship had sailed a long time ago, not that it had ever really docked. It majorly sucked that the only man she felt any kind of butterflies towards was a misanthropist, self righteous, bastard.

'Had any interesting cases?' Chase finished off the last of his chips, placing his hands on his stomach as he slouched back. Eating his food too quickly was a habit he was fast becoming accustomed to due to the fact he was constantly being called from lunch to do emergency surgeries.

She shook her head indicating a no and he opened his mouth to respond but was cut off by the anticipated beeping at his side. Though it was somewhat of an annoyance at times, he couldn't help the rush of adrenaline he felt hearing the noise.

'Sorry gotta run.' He stood, briefly pausing to pat her shoulder, 'If you're not feeling better go home okay?'

She nodded, rolling her head to the side as he disappeared. Though she really ought to get back to work herself, finding the energy was proving difficult. Maybe he was right, maybe she should call it a day? It's not like the ER was flat out busy at the moment.

Reluctantly ignoring the thought, she grabbed her water bottle determined to make it to the end of her shift.

In the very least she could get ahead on some paperwork and failing that there was always an abundance of mail in House's office to be sorted. She could find something monotonous to keep her mind occupied, even if it was encouraging her former boss' bad habits.

Pulling away from the table, she took her half eaten salad giving it one last nauseated glare before tossing it away. Work, home and then sleep. Eating, for the moment, was definitely the farthest thing on her mind.