Simple note:

I don't own CSI or the characters, but if I did, well, lets just say Grissom and Sara would already be a couple.

-this story is a companion piece to I'd like to have that one back . Yes, same author under a different pen name. I wrote both stories, no lie. So enjoy!

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(Grissom's thoughts and feelings)

……his life had taken a sharp turn since the moment she had left. Everything that had meant something to him, didn't mean anything. His hearing had no longer been a issue, he knew he would lose it but it didn't matter anymore, he had lost her. He wished he had paid more attention to her, spent more time with her, let her in, just once if he could go back and erase everything he ever did wrong……..

If I had only known

It was the last walk in the rain

I'd keep you out for hours in the storm

I would hold your hand

Like a life line to my heart

Underneath the thunder we'd be warm

If I had only known

It was our last walk in the rain

……..Deafness was nothing new to him, his mother was deaf. Silence filled her world and would end up doing the same to him. But it wasn't the silence that scared him it was never hearing her voice. The voice that had captured him the first time she had ever spoke to him that day so long ago. The voice that haunted his dreams ever since she had left. Every word she spoke was a treasure he could never give up, how she made him think when he didn't understand where she was coming from, how she could make a simple word mean so much. It was her voice that captured his attention when no one else could…………..

If I had only known

I'd never hear your voice again

I'd memorize each thing you ever said

And on those lonely nights

I could think of them once more

Keep your words alive inside my head

If I had only known

I'd never hear your voice again

………..Life is hard and things never come out the way you planned. Evil is always present in our day to day life's. No one understood that better than he did. He saw the horror everyday, but so did she, always was beside him. She was his emotional release, never hide her feelings. He never knew how to show how he felt, she did it for him. She was like gold to him, something that would always be there when he needed it, but he took her for granted and she left without reason or cause, or so he thought. But then as the days went by, he realized that she left because of his own inability to show how true his feelings were for her, he loved her and that was something he never knew he could do until she walked into his life………

You were the treasure in my hand

You were the one who always stood

Beside me

So unaware I foolishly believed

That you would always be there

But then there came a day

And I turned my head and you

Slipped away

…………Sitting alone in his empty townhouse, his mind drifted back to that day when she stood in his office wanting to leave. One sentence kept repeating itself over and over again. "You think this is just about me, if you don't sign my request I'll have to leave" It was about him, he didn't do the things that would show her he cared, he didn't take the time to talk, he built a wall that day, and won't let her through, and she left…He then does the one thing he never dreamed he would do, it needed to be done so he could have her back…………

If I had only known

It was my last night by your side

I'd pray a miracle would stop the dawn

And when you'd smile at me

I would look into your eyes

And make sure you know my love

For you goes on and on

If I had only known

The love I would've shown

If I had only known……………

TBC