Risk

Exposure to the chance of injury or loss; a hazard or dangerous chance

I knew it the second I wrote down the words that I was taking a huge risk. The words were meaningless if any one else said them, but structured and presented to the world through my mouth could lead to dangerous and ultimately disastrous consequences. The sentence I'd written when I heard the news was exactly that, a ticking time bomb. But it was the truth, it was how I felt, raw emotion that I had to release in the only form I could. Through lyrics, the only tie we still seemed to have left.

I don't want to hear the wedding bells.

Months later the sentence had become a chorus, more words were strung together to form what would become a song. A complete risk.

To perform it? Well that had taken serious balls. I hadn't even wanted to record it honestly, but late one night as the band discussed the album and which songs would be included I couldn't help but dwell on the song wondering what would happen if I showed it to everyone. I read the lyrics many times and I knew it was the only way I could make her see. I needed to make her see I was unhappy. Was it wrong to force this on her? Maybe? But through lyrics we communicated, through spoken words we got no where, we hadn't said anything worth while in a very long time apart from pleasantries which were far beyond fake.

I wanted to make her talk, to make her angry and see the truth.

It was risk but I'd take the chance knowing well the consequences I faced.

So I sung wedding bells.

I sung it to everyone.

"One minute..."

I looked up at Joe who was staring at me lounged across my sofa his eyes shifting to the clock. I followed his gaze seeing the time...

2.59am

Her habit of calling at midnight where ever she was in the world became somewhat of annoyance with time differences yet I could depend on it.

That was something that Miley had never changed.

I'd prepared myself for this minute, ever since we confirmed the set list for the show. I'd planned what I'd say to her, how I'd act but I knew the moment she did call that would all change. Miley had that affect over me, a way to quickly destroy my plans and my direction in a second by saying the smallest things. It's not that her words were thought out or constructed, it was the way she said them. I could tell the difference now, I spoke to two different Miley's since we broke up, the first was the one who had to be conservative and pleasant, the other was brutal and honest; I knew already the one I'd face tonight.

"What if she doesn't call?" Joe asked slowly.

I watched the clock not shifting my eyes from it, fifteen seconds to go.

"She will."

"Nick you may have gone too far this time-"

"I could never go too far, she may hate me but she'll call to tell me as much. Silence isn't something Miley does well she always wants to put her two cents in."

"I think it'll be more than two cents..."

"I took the risk understanding the consequences Joe."

Five. Four. Three. Two. One.

Silence. Deadly silence.

My eyes stared at the phone and waited, for it to blare, for the sound of my impending doom.

Yet it didn't come.

"12.01..." Joe whispered quietly, "I guess she's broken the last tie you guys still had-"

Not a second later the phone started ringing. My eyes looked at the screen just to make sure as I quickly closed them a little scared of the name that appeared,

"Or not," Joe finished dismally, "I'll give you some privacy, good luck Nick."

He left the room as I picked up my phone, it's weight suddenly feeling like far more of a burden than normal. I had to answer though, because I'd taken the risk and as selfish as I'd been I wouldn't just keep silent, like Miley I wanted to put my two cents in, even if it was the last few coins I had left. I pressed accept and moved it to my ear,

"You promised." She whispered.

Two simple words that could have meant nothing but held so much just by adding a particular tone. However it wasn't the tone I'd expected, nor was the small intake of air Miley made as she attempted to mask what I knew was a sob. Miley wasn't angry, mad, screaming or yelling like she had so many times before. This time she was upset, crying, something I hadn't expected, something I hadn't planned for. So like that I was off the tracks, the plans gone in a second.

"I never said I'd keep it Miley." I responded truthfully, "You just assumed I wouldn't write a song,"

"I told you to keep it a secret, that-"

"I did, I didn't tell the press about your engagement, I didn't say anything I kept my word-"

"You lied to me!" She yelled her voice shaking, "Your reaction, you faked it to me, you...you said you were happy for me."

I said nothing in response, instead listening to her quickly hastening breaths because she was right, I had lied to her.

"You caught me off guard I lied because-"

"What? You didn't want to hurt me?" She whispered quietly through the speaker, "But then you go and write a song about me, my fiance, our upcoming wedding..."

"I couldn't tell you I was unhappy Miley."

"You just did! Through a three minute song that you sung to the world!" She hissed hurt,

"I-"

"Are selfish," Miley suddenly interrupted, letting out a sob, "And you have no idea the repercussions you create when you do something like that! We had our battle Nick, I thought that was over, I thought we were okay, that I could trust you again. You mislead me, you lied to my face and you turned around and did something so stupid and reckless that I don't think you can even understand the consequences."

"Miley it's just a song," I felt myself retort,

"That potentially just ruined my engagement."

"Oh for God's sake Miley you're blowing this-"

Then she started actually sobbing and I stooped realizing the word potentially might have been misinterpreted.

"Wait? Liam he-"

"Didn't know..." She yelled at me through sobs, "That I told you we were engaged before the official announcement."

I snapped my mouth closed feeling the brutal impact of the consequences, listening to the girl I loved cry because of me, because of something I'd done to try and prove to her that it was meant to me she walked down the aisle to.

"I didn't know that!"

"How could you?" She spat, "That's why I made you promise, that's why-"

"Miley if he loves you then-"

"He screamed at me on the phone, he was so mad, at you, at me and..." She cried her voice trembling, "I'm so scared now."

I leaned back on the chair feeling sick with guilt, and mad, fucking mad because it wasn't her fault, it was mine. I listened to her crying, and I could just see Miley in my mind, the fifteen year old version of her who stood staring at me her hair drenched and the first few tears mixing with the rain on December 19th. I promised that I'd never hurt her like that again, I'd taken this risk believing it wouldn't end like this. I thought she'd be mad but this was worse...

"I was unhappy, I just needed to express-" I tried to explain only for her to chock on a sob,

"But I was happy!" She suddenly yelled her voice faltering, "I was, and I haven't been this happy in such a long time."

"So you wanted me to tell you the truth to-"

"You shouldn't have said a thing Nick, or sung about me. You should have just stayed silent."

"I wanted to show you-"

"You could have just told me! Alone, in person." She whimpered,

"You wouldn't have listened,"

"You never even tried how would you know? Instead you just went behind my back and wrote a song."

"I never meant to hurt you, I just-"

"Are you kidding me?" She hissed, "You're not that stupid, you knew well enough what this would do."

Yet again she was right, a part of me knew I'd hurt her just not this much. I closed my mouth evaluating the predicament, I had to make her see, understand that I was only doing this because I loved her, that I wanted her to be mine. Miley sighed on the other end of the line, the tears most likley still falling but now she had control of them her mind was going to clear and the anger would consume her like it always did.

"So what do you want me to do?" I asked quietly, "Say I'm sorry,"

"No because you're not."

"You're right I'm not, just like I'm not happy." I spoke back.

"So I'm not allowed to be either?" She whispered her voice shaking again.

I closed my eyes sighing, "Miley I want you be happy with me, not him, I don't like Liam I don't-"

"You haven't even met him, you have no idea what he's like." She snapped.

I could have laughed, yet I knew better than that, instead I said it in words. "Any man who yells at his fiance and blames her for something she had no part or say in is not a good man Miley." I announced boldly, "I don't like him, nor will I ever because he took something that will forever be mine."

"I'm not yours to keep!' She suddenly screamed,

"Your heart is,"

Miley didn't respond as I groaned, "Miley I want a second chance I want-"

"It's too late, you had your chance-"

"You never gave me one-"

"I gave you two Nick, both times it ended in tears. I won't do that to myself again," She stated her voice rising trying to hold back the tears,

"Third time is the charm."

"I can't," She stated simply, "I'm engaged, don't you get that, I'm getting married, I'm happy Nick don't ruin this for me."

"But I can love you more than he can-"

"I don't doubt that." She stated quietly, "But when I fight with Liam I always know where we stand at the end, with you...I never did."

"We can fix that, we can fix us I swear-"

"It's too much of a risk!" Miley suddenly yelled, "Why should I risk losing the one guy who is willing to marry me for you?"

"Because I risked singing the song about you tonight. To tell the world I still haven't given up on us."

"But what if I have?" She announced.

I opened my mouth but stopped because that really hurt, more than I thought it would. Miley had never said that before.

"Well have you?" I responded simply.

"I'm engaged."

"That's not an answer"

"I'm getting married"

"So you haven't given up?" I replied.

To that there was silence as suddenly the risk became worth while, she hadn't given up.

"I know you're mad but the thing is what I said in the song is true." I announced.

"Nick you will hear the wedding bells-"

I closed my eyes, "Not yet, I still have time and even if I do hear those bells I'm not giving up and I know a part of you isn't either."

"I love him Nick."

"And you love me too, just who do you love more?"

Yet again I'd caught her off guard with a question she either was unwilling to divulge the answer to or didn't want to accept the truth.

"I have to go," She finally announced.

"I'll drop by when I'm in L.A-"

"I'd rather you not, you've done enough and if Liam-"

"I'll see you soon Mi, I love you"

"Don't call me that-"

I hung the phone up knowing that the call couldn't last any longer, I'd won and she knew it. I stood up relieved, guilty but thankful and as I turned finding Joe looking at me expectantly I couldn't help but give a weak shaky smile,

"The risk was worth it after all."

A/N- I had to do it after seeing the wedding bells video, I was like oh my god Nick you didn't just do that! Although it reignited the whole Niley debate I'm gonna put it out their and say I honestly think he's a bit selfish, she's clearly in love with Liam and to go and do that...it makes things extremely hard for everyone. On a side note as a Niley fan I thought it was straight damn awesome, but if I was Miley I'd be pissed at him right about now lol. Tell me what you guys thought I'd love to know! xx