I sigh with relief as the professor finally ends his lengthy lecture. It was late and I was hungry and I couldn't wait to get out of this room. I fixed my things hurriedly and left the lecture room.
As I made my way out, I fished my phone out of my bag to check if I received any messages during the class but found none. I felt a tiny pinch in my heart at this fact but decided to brush it off. I instantly opened my messenger and clicked on the first contact. I send a message to my best friend, telling her that may classes were done and ask about her whereabouts.
I take a seat in one of the benches built just outside the college building as I await for her reply. Five, ten, fifteen minutes passed and not a single reply was received. I felt bad not waiting for her reply but my stomach was making embarrassing sounds already and I knew I had to get food soon. I made my way towards our favorite restaurant, intent on buying some takeouts for the both of us. However, the sight that greets me as soon as I got to the place floored me.
There, inside the restaurant, was the person I was trying to reach these past 30 minutes. She was happily eating and chatting with 3 girls I recognized as her classmates.
It hurts. I felt betrayed. No. I shake my head and tried my best to rid my mind of negative thoughts. I had to give her the benefit of the doubt. Maybe they were having a meeting over dinner for a project. It wasn't uncommon. Maybe they were really busy and she has yet to see my message. That's right! I should give her a call. I'm sure she'll answer it.
I grabbed my phone once more and called her number. Pressing the device to my ear, I watched her intently as the ringing from the other line filled my ears. I feel my heart swell at the site of her looking at her phone only for it to come crashing down as she ignored my call and allow it to go to voicemail.
My ears fail to register whatever it was she says in her recorded message. My mind was filled with a single thought.
She's finally grown tired of me.
Suddenly not feeling the hunger anymore, I forgo my plan of getting food and just decided to go straight back home. My thoughts as I walked back was filled with my relationship with my best friend. I knew something like this would happen sooner or later. But no matter how much I try to mentally prepare myself for something like this to happen, I still find myself caught off guard when it finally did.
I reached the apartment complex and made my way up to our shared apartment. My heart aches at the sight of her house slippers. The same thing happens when I enter our living room and see her study materials sprawled all over the living room table.
People often said that you never really know a person until you live with them. And I guess that's what happened to the two of us as well. I thought she was an organized and clean person based on my regular visits to her home. This wasn't the only flaws I discovered about her. But despite this, my feelings for her never changed. I guess the same couldn't be said about her.
Maybe she finally got fed up with my clingy attitude. I am a loner. I have been one ever since I could remember. She was one too and that was the reason why we got along during our first year in high school. But her attitude was not by choice. Circumstances forced her to be one. The way she easily made friends with our school idol groupmates showed me that. Meanwhile, I only liked to keep a small number of people close. But I hold these people closely to my heart. I guess it got to a point that she felt suffocated.
A sad smile graced my lips as I thought about the years we had together. We've been friends since our first year in high school up to now. I guess that's good enough for me. It's the longest time I've been with someone besides my family. It would be selfish of me to hold on to her and keep her from doing better things and be happy.
I change into my pajamas and decide to just turn in early, my mood not allowing me to do anything else. Lying on the bed, I spot the bear she had given me years ago. I grab it and embrace it, holding it tightly as if holding it would keep the giver closer to me. I bury my face into its fury body and allow the tears to finally fall.