Hello! Thank you for choosing to read this! This is my first fan fiction, so please be helpful with your reviews. I won't hold you up, so I'll get through the boring disclaimers and let you get to it. I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist or any of the characters therein. I also do not own the song in this chapter.
This chapter is set after the events of Conqueror of Shambala.
Come Wake Me Up by Rascal Flatts
Winry sat on her bed, gazing blankly at the bottle of whiskey in her hand, the last dying rays of sunlight coming through her window. Normally, a few big gulps of the spirit was all it took to get him off of her mind, but tonight it was proving more difficult to banish him. He and his little brother had both been gone for five years now, and while she missed them both, her feelings for Edward Elric were vastly different than what she felt for Alphonse. God, how she missed that idiot. So, every year on the anniversary of the day they traveled to the other side of the gate, she drank heavily, trying to silence the screaming of her soul.
It was easy to be mad at him for leaving her again on any other day, the emotion momentarily pushing her other feelings for him aside, but right now she was too exhausted to fight, having thrown herself into her work to try and forget what today was. So instead, as she did every year when the alcohol didn't work, she let her memories of him sink in, the pain coming back one-hundred fold, cutting open the emotional scars to bleed anew. Her tears flowed as she remembered their last real moment together, her own body leaning over his leg and arm as she attached new, updated limbs into their ports, sharing a short and fast conversation with her patient. She could remember his voice so clearly, too clearly, in fact, that she turned up the radio in an effort to drown out his voice, an effort that was wasted.
His voice broke her harder than the memory of him, and she could hear his gentle voice telling her to please put down the bottle, that he wasn't worth the anguish she was putting herself through, so she set it down and put her head in her hands, rocking back and forth. She tried to imagine what and how he was doing right now. Probably laying in a cozy bed dreaming of alchemy, a girl in the bed with him and Alphonse down the hall. But, where ever he was or what he was doing, she was certain she wasn't on his mind at all. All she wanted right now was for both of them to come running up the hill to her house, Alphonse left in the dust as his older brother raced ahead to hold her.
And despite what her grandmother, neighbors, and people in town told her, the whole "time heals everything" saying was complete bullshit. It wasn't healing anything.
I know that you can't hear me, but Ed, I need you to save me tonight.
Winry laid down, pulling his red coat that the military had given her as his next of kin up to her chin, burying her nose into the fabric and inhaling deeply. She had worked hard to keep it smelling like him, washing it in the same detergent and lightly spraying it with a bottle of cologne she had bought for him one year. She laid in the flames of her grief, hoping and praying that she was dreaming and that he would be home in the morning. She closed her eyes tightly, clutching the coat closer to her body, and slowly drifted off to sleep.
Please, come wake me up.
Well, what'd you think? Not too horrible, right? Please review and let me know what you think!
A/N: I'm doing some editing/tweaking to most of the chapters.