Ding Dong Merrily on Live: After the Show
I absolutely loved the live episode of Not Going Out. The whole cast nailed it, everyone did such a brilliant job and showed off their talents so well. As a long time (super)fan of the show it made me feel quite proud actually. I thought Lee in particular seemed to thrive on the jeopardy of the live element and I enjoyed his little ad libs and breaking the fourth wall moments so much. Well done to all involved. Kudos to Lee for writing such a funny and clever show and for making it as difficult as possible for himself (and the rest of the cast, particularly Hugh and Abigail with that song 😂)
I haven't published anything for a while as life has got in the way of my writing but I am still working on some stories and will try and publish more often in 2019. I was inspired by last Friday's episode to write a little short fic set straight after. I hope you enjoy it. Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year everyone x
"Lee! Put the ice skates away, it's never going to happen. Not in a million years, I can't even stand up in those things. I thought you'd taken those to the charity shop anyway. I know they were a present from Daisy but I'm never going to use them. Speaking of Daisy, I hope she's getting on alright with the kids staying at hers, they're so hyped up for Christmas now they've broken up for the school holidays".
"They're fine, she Whataspped earlier remember. They'll be fast asleep by now".
"I hope so, for her sake, and ours. If they play her up she might never offer to have them again".
"Stop worrying. You worry too much, about everything".
"If you're referring to earlier tonight I think I had every right to worry".
"I mean generally. Anyway, back to next year's show. Alright, so we won't put ice skating in it, just a sawing in half trick, or sword swallowing maybe, how hard can either of those be?".
"Lee, are you harbouring ambitions to join the circus or something? Read my lips, there isn't going to be another Ding Dong Merrily on Live show next Christmas, or if there is, we are not volunteering to organise it or be part of it in anyway".
"Lucy, you have to admit, it was all quite fun in the end".
"Not my idea of fun. Maybe I should tie you up next time and see how you'd like it".
"I wouldn't have a problem with you tying me up. I quite like the idea. I've told you that before".
"What about me throwing knives at you?"
"That bit not so much. I saw you try to win at a coconut shy on at the school Summer fete last year remember. That poor teacher who was running the stall, his nose has never looked the same again since you broke it".
"That wasn't my fault, he should have moved out of the way. Anyway, stop making this about me. I still can't believe you actually threw knives at me tonight. What if it had gone wrong? You could have maimed me, or worse".
"I knew it would be fine, I wouldn't have risked hurting you. You just need to trust me more".
"I do trust you, but not as it turns out when you're about to throw knives in my general direction. Just promise me that if you ever decide to go on stage again you'll stick to the juggling. You're actually really good at that".
"I think you'll find I was actually pretty good at the knife throwing too. No blood was shed".
"Who'd have thought? You turning out to be quite the tosser! I think the fact you pulled it off was due to beginners luck though, not talent".
"No, it was all the years of playing darts, I'm good at hitting targets".
"Still, if you ever try anything like that again, there will be blood shed, and it'll be yours, not mine".
"You must have enjoyed the show on some level though, that amount of adrenaline, it makes you buzz".
"Yeah, well clearly I'm not as much of a masochist as you. I prefer to get my thrills in other ways thanks".
"Such as?"
"I don't know, watching the children open their Christmas presents, watching a nailbiting boxset, listening to juicy gossip at the school gates, going on the teacups at the fair, joining the kids in the ball pit at soft play...".
"Flirting with Spanish stunt performers in front of your husband?".
"Oh come on, I wasn't really flirting with Juan".
"Yes you were".
"Okay, so maybe I was flirting a bit, but it was harmless. You need to be less insecure, I didn't mean anything by it, I only have eyes for you".
"Fine, but I'm sure you wouldn't like it if I flirted with other women in front of you, just saying".
"You do, and it's usually with my mum".
"I don't flirt with your mum...not really. At least I don't on purpose, sometimes I just come out with stuff that could be construed that way".
"If you say so. God, this dress is actually really uncomfortable, and I look like a...budgie".
"Well, maybe you'd better take it off then".
Lee gave Lucy one of his cheeky but actually if she was completely honest almost irrestably sexy looks.
"Oh look, Mrs Brown's Boys has started now".
"Oh", Lee sighed, not even trying to hide his disappointment.
Lucy smiled, then she shuffled closer to him again, her expression changing to one full of promise, giving Lee hope once more that the evening may not be over after all.
"Don't look so downhearted. I was going to suggest we turn off the TV and watch it on Iplayer later".
"Oh right, good. So...this costume is working for you after all?"
"Maybe it is a little bit, if I'm honest", Lucy said as she leaned in closer to Lee, "this is going to have to come off though, its in the way..."
Lucy swiftly lifted off Lee's hat and threw it across the room. It landed over a framed photograph of her parents, covering it up.
"Okay, maybe you are good aim after all".
"I wasn't aiming for that".
"I assumed you were, coz, you know...you didn't want them watching us". As Lee spoke, he began to slowly run his hand over Lucy's thigh, making her skin flush and tingle with anticipation.
"Good point", she whispered.
Lee's breathing had started to become unsteady now, as Lucy's eyes trained on his, then moved their focus to his lips. The temperature in the room seemed to have risen by several degrees.
"Shall I leave the cape on?"
"Yep", Lucy answered quietly, before closing the tiny gap between them at last, capturing Lee's lips in a passionate kiss as she pushed him down into the sofa cushions...