DISCLAIMER: I don't own Hey Arnold! the show or its characters. Okay? Okay. :)

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Ice Blue Eyes
By Lynx7

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Arnold lay on his bed, staring up at the ceiling. The sky was very clear today, he thought; And also very blue. Like the color of Helga's eyes.

"What am I saying?" he hissed, sitting upright, appalled at his thoughts.
"She's been gone for almost 3 years now. Some people have even forgot about her already." He scolded himself. He gritted his teeth in frustration, his hands clenching into fists. The sky wasn't as clear as it was a few moments ago, with a small group of clouds moving slowly from the east. Arnold closed his eyes. "So then...why do i keep thinking about her?"

flashback

"Helga, is that you?" Arnold asked, lifting up his umbrella to get a closer look at the huddled figure sitting on the sidewalk. His eyes widened in surprise. "Helga, what happened?" he said, with real concern in his voice. "Why are you out in this kind of weather? Do your parents know where you are?"

"Just shut up for a second, Arnold." Helga murmured, stifling a sneeze.
"Why do you always stick your nose into other people's business like that,
football-head??" she snapped as he stepped closer. She seemed to hesitate as she spoke. "Just-- just leave me alone."

He didn't know why those words had hurt so much. After all, they never really were friends. But at that moment, he felt as if a huge blow had been made to his stomach, and it hurt too much for words to describe.

"You know what Helga," he finally replied, his voice rising in anger. "I don't know why I even bother talking to you." He said, his voice was cold.
This seemed to startle Helga, for she immediately turned to look at him. Her eyes were red and she was very pale. "So I think I will listen to your insults for once and if you want me to leave you alone, I will. Goodbye, Helga." He turned around just as her eyes widened, a look of horror sweeping across her face. He never even saw her cry.

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The following day, Helga avoided him. He didn't even bother to speak to her either. It was like she wasn't there. This went on for a few days until one day, Helga stopped coming to school. Arnold wasn't phased a bit but soon became worried as the days wore on.
"Helga?" replied Phoebe, seemingly surprised at his question. "She moved.
Moved to California last Wednesday." as the petite Japanese girl spoke, her eyes watered and she rubbed them in frustration. "Her family had been planning it for months now," she paused, and then continued. "but she only found out about it a few days ago." Phoebe coughed and blinked a few times before continuing. But Arnold wasn't listening anymore.

"That night---" he murmured lost in his thoughts. "I was so cold to her without even bothering to know why!" He cried out as he slammed his fist into the wall. Phoebe jumped a little from the outburst, but could only look at him sadly as a tear fell onto her cheek. "...but it's too late now." He spoke, barely averaging a whisper. "She's gone"

end of flashback

Arnold shut his eyes. He didn't want to feel the pain anymore.
"Helga," he whispered, lost in his thoughts. He wanted so much to just get away from everything. From all those memories. But why did he care so much? She, the most notorious bully ever known at P.S. 118 was occupying his thoughts way more than she ever did before moving away. And no matter how much he tried, he just couldn't figure out why.

But then again, he didn't really want to know. He wanted to forget everything. Forget ever being present that night. He didn't want to care.

Arnold closed his eyes again that day, but this time, he slept.

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"Um, grandpa, don't you think this is a bit too much?" Arnold gasped, struggling to carry 3 bags full of meat. Grandpa heartily slapped him on the back, which only caused him to struggle even more with the packages.

"Nonsense, shortman! It's to toughen up your muscles!" He said happily."Well, here we are!" Grandpa exclaimed, stopping in front of a small residencial building.
"I gotta go now, shortman! But don't forget to take these to Pookie, alright?"

"Sure thing, grandpa." Arnold replied, leaving the old man on the building's doorstep.Arnold couldn't help but laugh to himself as he began to turn a corner. He really loved spending time with his grandfather, even more so now that they were both getting older. "Oh grandpa--" Arnold began, but soon found himself hitting the cold cement, really hard.

"Ow! Watch where you're going, geekbait!" A loud voice rang in his ear.
There stood a girl, about his age, with jet-black hair. She wore leather jeans along with a black shirt, and a simple silver ring rested on her finger. She stared at him coldly. Arnold quickly stood up, not bothering to pick up the meat.

"Helga.?" he asked in disbelief, focusing his eyes on her. She gave him a disgusted look.

"What the heck did you call me?" The girl frowned, curling up her fists as she spit a wad of gum onto the street. Arnold turned away.

"S-sorry. I thought you were someone else." He apologized. But as the girl pushed him away anxiously, she seemed to hesitate.

"Well don't call me that name EVER again blondie. It makes me sick." She growled, giving him one last menacing glare before walking away. Arnold stood there for a second in disbelief. She was so much like Helga. The way she moved, the color of her eyes, even the way she glared at him. But there was no way. Arnold picked up the meat slowly. Still contemplating on what just happened. He started to walk away when something caught his eye. It was the ring.

"She must've dropped it when she pushed me." He said to himself as he quickly picked it up. "I'd better give it back to her."

Arnold stuffed the ring in his pocket before carrying the bags of meat once again. He talked about nothing else that day with Helga still on his mind.

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"Man, you've got it bad." Gerald smirked as he shut his locker door. Arnold rolled his eyes.

"How would YOU know Gerald?" he groaned, leaning his head on the wall. He hadn't gotten much sleep the other night. "Mr. Hardemann gives WAY too much homework." he mentally told himself.

"Look Arnold. When you had a major crush on Ruth McDougle and Lila, who figured it out? None other than yours truly. I'm your best friend. I can tell when these things happen." Gerald stated, the smirk never leaving his face. Arnold groggily waved his hand in the air and dismissed the conversation. Gerald sighed in exasperation.

"Whatever you say, Man."

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Arnold shifted restlessly in his seat. He hadn't liked what Gerald had said. Him? In love with Helga? It probably was the most ridiculous thing he'd ever heard. And yet, he felt a tinge of uncertainty as Gerald's words echoed through his head once again. Well, did he like her?

"Yeah, right." He murmured, shaking his head. The bell rang. Arnold lifted his bag from the back of his seat and quickly stepped out of the classroom.
He didn't feel like hanging out with the gang today.

"Wait up Arnold!" came a dainty voice out of nowhere as he reached the entrance of P.S. 118 high school.

"What??" he yelled in frustration. It was as if they were all bugging him that day on purpose. But as he turned around, he immediately regretted his actions.

"Arnold?" Lila whispered meekly, a hurt look appearing on her face. "Are you alright? You seem-"

"I'm fine, Lila." He said, trying his best to sound polite. Even though he hated seeing her look like that, he still didn't really feel like talking to her, or anyone else for that matter.

"Well, if you need anyone to talk to, I'll be here." She said, putting her hand on his shoulder, giving him a warm smile. Arnold bit his lip. She was always like this. This kind, unselfish person whom he had been in love with ever since he knew she existed. At least, he thought he did. He pulled away hesitantly, not wanting to see her face.

"No, really Lila, I'm fine." He said, walking away. He heard a faint 'goodbye' as her footsteps faded amidst the bustling noise of the outside boundaries of P.S.118. He sighed in relief. He didn't want to feel the desire to be with her. It just felt... wrong. But even as he thought about it, he seemed to regret what he just did even more. He knew he liked her,
end of discussion. But at the same time, he couldn't stand the fact that she didn't like him the same way. He sighed once again. This really wasn't his day.

He was halfway to his home before he heard strange voices coming from an alley.

"Get your hands off me, you creep!" a girl yelled. Arnold ducked in the alley to get a closer look. His eyes widened in surprise. It was the girl he had met earlier that week.

"Let go off me, you freak!" She screamed again, jerking her arm rapidly from the man. Arnold felt anger rising from his chest. The man merely chuckled.

"Not 'til you give me a kiss, baby." He said, moving his face closer to hers. She cringed in disgust. Finally, Arnold snapped.

"Let go of her." He said, as he stepped out of the shadows, his hands tightly clenched into fists. Both the girl and the man stared at him in surprise. Finally the man spoke.

"Get out of the way, boy. This is none of your business." He snapped,
tightening his grip on the black-haired girl's arm. She yelped in pain.
Arnold couldn't take it anymore.

"Let go of her!" he said finally, before punching the guy in the face. The bulky man stumbled backwards.

"You..." he growled, spitting out a tooth. "You'll pay for this, kid!" he said, turning away from the scene. He kicked a garbage can before disappearing in the distance. Arnold was breathing heavily now.

"I didn't need your help." A voice hissed in his ear. He turned around.

"Sorry." he began, but she was already halfway across the street before he could even say another word. He stuffed his hands into his pockets.
Suddenly, his eyes widened in realization. "Wait!" he called out. She stopped and glared at him from afar. He almost lost all power to speak.
"Um, your ring." he began, lifting the silver trinket out of his pocket. Her eyes widened in surprise as she stepped closer to him to get a better look at the piece of jewelry. "I found it the other day. I thought you might have wanted it back."

She stared at him for a moment. Her eyes seemed to search through him, lost in her own emotions. Then, it was gone. Her eyes closed in on the ring, a scowl decorating her face once again as she began to walk back towards him.

"Whatever." She groaned as she snatched the ring from Arnold's hands. Then she paused for a moment. "Thanks." She said, barely managing a whisper.
Arnold smiled.

"May I walk you home?" he said, as gallantly as he could. The girl's face contorted once again into a frown. She turned away without saying a word,
walking faster than before.

"Hey-- Wait up!" Arnold said, following after her but she only ran faster.
Finally Arnold couldn't take it anymore. In a moment of carelessness, he tripped, his legs giving way as he fell to the ground, really hard. He stood there, dazed for a moment, as he watched her disappear in the crowd. He was completely lost in thought.

"Hey mister, are you all right?" a tiny voice rang in his ear.

"Huh?" he said, looking up to find a little boy looking at him strangely.
He glanced at his watch. 7:30 pm.

"Shoot, I'm late for dinner!" he stammered, standing up on his feet,
running as quickly as he could to the boarding house. He tried his best to get Helga off of his mind.

But some thoughts still lingered in his head.

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"Arnold."

"Huh? Who's there?"

"Arnold.."

"Who- who are you??"

"Arnold!"

"Stop it!" Arnold screamed, staring up at the ceiling. He was sweating all over. Arnold closed his eyes in relief. It had only been a nightmare. He checked his clock. 7:15am. Arnold sighed.

"It's a Saturday." He murmured, groggily sitting up from his bed. "I forgot."

He winced. His head hurt really bad. "Must've been the nightmare." Arnold assured himself as he got ready to take a bath. But deep inside he knew the real reason. Arnold hit his head on the wall. "Stop it, Arnold." he told himself once again, but he couldn't. Nightmares of Helga had been plaguing him night after night over the past 3 years, ever since his conversation with Phoebe about Helga's disappearance. He closed his eyes once again, but this time in frustration. He needed an aspirin.

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Arnold checked his watch. 2:35pm. He was supposed to meet the gang at the bowling alley in an hour and a half. "I guess i could pass by the park..."
he trailed off. Ever since last year, for reasons unknown, he had begun to visit the park on a weekly basis just to think and maybe hang out with some friends if ever they were interested in joining him. He checked his watch again. 2:37pm. He had plenty of time.

The crisp fresh air invigorated Arnold as he sat at his favorite spot by the lake. He closed his green eyes and sat there, deep in thought. He was like that a lot these days. At least, that's what Gerald had told him.

"Man, you think too much these days!" were the exact words Gerald had said during a seemingly harmless conversation about Pizza. Arnold chuckled to himself. The situation seemed pretty funny at the time. He opened his eyes slowly. He was so deep in thought that he didn't even notice someone slip by beside him.

"Mind if I join you?" a female voice asked sweetly. Arnold turned his head.

"Sure, Lila," he replied, a bit confused. She had never gone up to him like this before. It was usually the other way around. "Do you need anything,
Lila?" he asked. Lila looked at him, slightly blushing.

"No Arnold, it's nothing really.." She began. "I just wanted to spend some time with you, that's all." Lila said, looking out into the lake. She seemed lost in thought. Arnold didn't say anything. He had already begun to stare at a figure in the distance.

"It's the girl." he thought aloud. She seemed to be coming closer. Arnold quickly stood up. Lila seemed startled by this since she stood up as well.
She opened her mouth to say something but closed it quickly, looking very hesitant.

"Look Lila, I have to go, I-" Arnold began but was soon cut off by two lips meeting his. The kiss seemed to last almost forever. Arnold merely stood there, shocked at what had taken place right before him. Lila had kissed him. He couldn't believe it. And yet, he didn't want to believe it. No sparks flew, no fireworks, just... nothing. It was just a kiss. Arnold stood there confused for a second. Lila looked at him strangely.

"I-Im sorry, I don't know what came over me, I-" Lila began, blaming herself for what had just happened. "No. I have to say it. I love you,
Arnold." she said, her voice was trembling. Arnold looked at her blankly.
"You... love me?" he said, in complete disbelief. "You. Love me??" Arnold began to chuckle to himself. Lila stared at him, disturbed.

"Arnold, what's wro-"

"You don't understand Lila!" Arnold cut her off. "I loved you. I loved you when you didn't even bother to say hi to me, when all the attention I seemed to get from you was a simple request for help whenever we had group projects together." He said, shaking his head.

"Arnold I,-"

"And now you say you love me??" Arnold continued. "No Lila." he said shaking his head. "Sorry, but I guess I just don't feel the same way." He said, walking away. "Goodbye."

Arnold walked away from the tree, leaving Lila standing there, alone. He closed his eyes. He felt like dying. His whole life was a mess. In his anger and confusion, he had just turned down the girl of his dreams. At least, he thought she was. Arnold clenched his fists. 'No.' he thought. He didn't love Lila. It was just some schoolboy crush. Arnold opened his eyes once again to the bright afternoon sun. "Nope.." he said out loud. He didn't love Lila. He loved-

Arnold turned around in sudden realization of what he had forgotten.The black-haired girl. She had totally slipped his mind after the kiss. He looked back around the park in desperation then sighed. She was nowhere to be found. Arnold sighed in frustration. He glanced at his watch again. 3:22pm.

"At least I'm not gonna be late for bowling." he thought as he set off for the bowling alley. He didn't even notice a coiled figure clad in black hiding meekly behind a tree.

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"Gutter ball?? Again??" Harold exclaimed, throwing his hands up into the air. Arnold quietly sat on his chair; sweat dripping off of his forehead."Arnold!!!" Harold exclaimed once again, but Arnold wasn't listening anymore. He needed a break.

"Hey Arnold, you seem distracted..." inquired Sid, looking at Arnold, trying to show concern. Arnold could tell he was stifling a giggle.

"Yeah, you do!" chimed in Stinky from behind. "It's not HELGA, is it?" They both said in unison, bursting out into laughter as soon as they said Helga's name.

"I'm getting outta here..." Arnold said, standing up. Gerald quickly ran towards him.

"Hey man, It wasn't me who-"

"It's okay Gerald." Arnold hissed angrily as he walked out of the bowling alley. "Look, I'm fine. I just need a little rest, okay?" he said finally,
trying to be as nice and happy as he could. Gerald could only nod his head.
"Bye Gerald. See you tomorrow."

"Bye Arnold."

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Arnold furrowed his brow in thought. Why had he been mad at Stinky and Sid?
It wasn't something he'd usually get upset about. And yet-

"No Arnold. It's nothing, remember?" he casually told himself. "You're most probably still shaken up after that whole incident with Lila..."

Arnold stopped for a second, remembering the kiss. He remembered her soft lips, her smooth skin, and her lovely auburn locks. And she said she loved him. Lila loved him. The woman of his dreams had actually considered him as more than a friend! And what did he do? He said no. He turned her away.

"I am so stupid..." He grunted, flopping down on his bed as he stared groggily at the ceiling. It was a cloudy night and he could barely see a star. He turned to his side, ready to fall asleep when the phone began to ring.

"Hello?" He asked, a bit pissed at the sudden interruption.

"Arnold...?" came a soft voice from the other end of the line. Arnold froze.

"Arnold, it's me. Lila."

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AUTHOR'S NOTES:

Since it's an old story that I'm re-editing, another chapter will be up soon. I've made the chapters longer too, so instead of 6 chapters, it'll become 2. Of course, the story isn't finished yet, so chapters 3 and above will take a really long time to... um... materialize. I hope you'll be able to bear with me 'til then though. :)