A long one-shot following Jacob and Connie's accident in 'Buried Alive' (02/04/2016). I'm secretly hoping for a sweet reunion following their brush with death, but I fear that may not happen in quite the way that I hope! Apologies for any medical inaccuracies! I'm much better at writing the 'fluff!'
WARNING – POTENTIALLY SENSIIVE CONTENT, i.e. DETAILS OF MEDICALLY INDUCED COMA.
Jacob moved the chair closer to her bed, lowering himself gently, his leg causing him more pain than he cared to admit. Tears filled his eyes as he looked down upon her. She looked so peaceful, despite the mask and tubes covering her face, but he longed for her to wake from her induced slumber. To hear her voice, to hold her in his arms once more. Jacob took hold of her left hand, and gently kissed her temple. "You know Sweetcheeks, he said with a slight smile, we're going to have to stop this hero thing, risking our lives to save the other. It's all got a bit out of hand now, yeah?" He stroked her hair with his free hand, moving stray strands behind her ear. His smile faded, the glint in his eye replaced by tears. "I'm sorry Connie. I'm so sorry I couldn't do more to protect you. I would never forgive myself if anything happened to you." He raised her hand to his lips, closing his eyes as tears threatened to spill down his cheeks. "I know you wanted us to spend some time apart, but I can't. I can't bear the thought of spending one moment without you by my side. I know I'm supposed to be this big, brave man, but I'm not sure I can be that person right now. The thing is, Con… I love you. I know you will find that hard to hear but, I love you like I have never loved anyone else and I can't let you just walk out of my life. I can't lose you babe. I can't lose you..." Tears flowed freely down his face as she lay there, seemingly lifeless as the familiar beeps emitted from various machines connected to the Clinical Lead. Jacob had sat by the bedside of many a patient, but this was an all too different vigil. It was different when that person is someone whom you love, and Connie was someone whom he loved beyond measure.
Jacob's sobs reverberated round the small room, muffling the sound of the door opening and the delicate footsteps of a young girl. Zoe had tried to explain to Grace that she may find it difficult to see her mum hooked up to so many machines, and it may be better to wait to visit her. However, Zoe clearly underestimated just how similar Grace was to Connie, and Grace took full advantage of a distracted Zoe, before leaving her mum's office, and heading straight for HDU.
Jacob was unaware of Grace's presence as he continued to speak to Connie, his voice becoming steady once more. "You know, I would do anything to swap places with you right now, for it to be me lying there and not you. It should be me." Jacob sighed, "Why didn't you just leave it to the HART team, Iain and Jez? Always have to save the day, don't you Queen B. The great, indispensable Connie Beauchamp to the rescue! Before you say it, I know that is a bit rich coming from me!", he said, with a smirk. "You see; this is why we're so good together babe. You and me, we're more alike than you'd like to admit. I know the reason you don't think thing will work out between us is because of Grace, and I understand that you need to put Grace first. I don't have kids, gosh, I wish I did, but I know how much you love her. She's your daughter, I would never expect you to choose me over her. But, it doesn't have to be about choices, Con. I know you want her to be happy, but that doesn't mean that you need to forsake your own happiness. What I don't understand is, why I can't be a part of both of your lives. She's a great kid, Connie. Feisty, smart and beautiful, just like her mum. I wish you would let me get to know her like I have got to know you. That night when we went to the airport, I promised you that you would never be on your own, and I am not about to break that promise to you, Connie. I think you need to hear that now more than ever. I can only imagine how hard it must have been for you to bring her up on your own, with such a demanding job. But things are different now babe, I'm here for you, and Grace and I'm not about to—"
Jacob was interrupted by the sound of gentle sobs. He turned to see Grace sat in the corner of the room, holding her knees tightly to her chest. "Grace? I didn't hear you come in. Hey, come here Firecracker." Jacob let go of Connie's hand and walked over to the young girl. "I would join you on the floor, but not sure this leg will let me", he said with a slight smile, pointing to the splint holding his leg in position. Grace looked up, her cheeks stained with tears. "Come here, he said, holding out his hand. Come and sit with your mum." Grace slowly stood up from the floor, but ignored his outstretched hand. Jacob pulled up another chair next to Connie's bed and sat beside Grace. "How much did you hear? He asked. "Enough" she replied, wiping tears from her eyes. "She'll be OK, Grace. I know it's frightening, but all this equipment in here, it's to help her get better." "You don't know that!" Her voice was cold, and abrasive, "you're just a Nurse." Many would be taken back by such a harsh retort, but Jacob just smiled. She really was her mother's daughter. "Well, that is perfectly true Firecracker, but I am an exceptionally gifted Nurse", he replied with a wink. "Your mum and I, we were trapped in a collapsed building. Your mum suffered severe trauma to her head from falling debris, and –" "Yes, I know. I don't need you to explain. I've read about it in books in mum's office. She has been put in an induced coma to prevent brain damage. Dr Hanna will have given her a form of drug, I think they're called Barbiturates to reduce the metabolic rate of her brain tissue and blood supply to her brain. This makes the blood vessels get narrower and reduces intracranial pressure. The swelling on her brain and pressure should decrease and brain damage may be avoided."
Jacob was impressed with the young girl's medical knowledge, clearly the hours spent in the ED had done her some good, but the matter of fact tone with which she recounted the description of a medically induced coma caused him concern. "Quite right, Dr Beauchamp" he said. "Dr? she replied. Don't you mean 'Miss!'" "Woah! Slow down, Mini-B, you need to complete many years of training before you can use such a respected title." Grace rolled her eyes but gave him a slight smile. "Do you really love my mum?" "What makes you ask that?" "I need to know; do you love her?" Jacob turned to Grace and placed his hands on her shoulders. "Grace, I love your mum more than anyone else in the whole world. She is very special to me, and I would do anything to make her happy. That includes making sure she always puts you first, because nothing makes her happier than spending time with you" "I'm not so sure about that, she's not been very happy lately. Not since I told her I didn't want her to be with you." Jacob moved his hands away from her shoulders, "You don't have to answer this Grace, but, can I ask you why?" Grace lowered her head, averting Jacob's gaze. "I just want it to be me, and mum, just like she promised. I'm scared I will lose her again. Everything always comes before me, especially her job. That's why I went to New York. I didn't want to leave mum, but she never had time for me. Dad promised he would always put me first, before his job, even before Emma. Mum thinks she can buy me the latest iPhone, designer clothes, shoes or take me on exotic holidays and that somehow makes it OK, but it doesn't. All I want is her. Just her. I want her to pick me up from school like normal mums do, help me with my homework and kiss me goodnight. I want to spend weekends lying on the sofa watching movies and eating popcorn. I know her job is important, and I want her to be happy, but I can't come second any more. I just can't. That's why I asked her to finish things with you. I just want my mum – is that too much to ask?"
Jacob was shocked at her honesty but saddened by what she had shared with him. He took her hand in his and wiped away the tears that continued to spill down her face. "Thank you for being so honest with me Grace. I know how much you have missed your mum, and believe me, she has missed you so much. I promise you that whatever happens between me and your mum, that I would never come between you. Your mum is so precious to me, and I want to be there to love her and protect her every day for the rest of my life, but you will always come first. Please believe me Grace." "Those are some big promises Jacob." "I know, but I don't make promises lightly, Grace." Grace and Jacob sat in silence, each mulling over the other's words. Seconds turned to minutes as their silence remained resolute. "I do like you, Jacob. You're funny, and pretty cool." "Why, thank you Mini B" he said, giving her a broad smile. "I want my mum to be happy, and find someone who loves her. I mean, properly loves her. I'm not sure she has ever been with anyone because she loves them, or they love her. Even Dad – let's face it, I was born because she wanted a baby, she never wanted him. She manipulated him to get what she wanted." Jacob desperately tried to conceal his trademark smirk, but even he knew that Connie thought of Sam as nothing but a sperm donor, one with remarkably good genes nevertheless. "I'm not going to comment on your mum's relationship with your dad, that's none of my business. I also want you to know that I would never try and take his place. Just like Emma will never be you mum even though she loves you very much. I love your mum, I 'properly' love her, and I hope that would mean getting to spend more time with you because as it happens, I think you're pretty cool too." Grace met his eyes for the first time, returning his smile before wrapping her arms around his neck. "I'm sorry Jacob" she said, resting her head on his shoulder. Jacob pulled her into a tight hug, "It's OK Princess." Grace removed her arms from around him and sat back down on the chair. "Do you think mum can hear us?" "Yeah, I think she can. Why don't you talk to her for a bit, let her hear your voice." Grace looked at him apprehensively. "It's OK, there's nothing to be scared of", he reassured her. Grace leaned forward and slowly placed her hand over Connie's. "Mum?... I'm sorry for what I said to you this morning, and last week. I love you. I know it may not seem like that sometimes, but I love you so much. You're the best mum I could ever ask for, and I want you to get better. Jacob is here with me too. I know he loves you, mum. I want you to be happy, just like dad is happy now he is with Em, and I think he will make you happy. Pl-ease w-ake up soon mm-um, she cried, I need you." Tears streamed down Grace's face as Jacob wrapped his arm around her shoulders. She turned to look at him, "Jacob, what is going to happen to me? Where will I stay until mum gets better? Gran's in New York with dad. I don't want to go there and leave mum, but I'm not old enough to stay on my own." "Well, you can come and stay with me. Or, if you want to stay at home, I could come and stay with you, just until your mum can come home." "Really? You would do that, for me?" "Of course I would, I'm not going to be at work for a few weeks, not with this thing strapped to my leg, so I will have plenty of time to look after you." "Can we visit mum every day?" "Every day, I promise." "Thank you Jacob, you're the best!" she exclaimed. "Oh, I know" he replied, giving her a wink.
A week had passed since the accident and Connie being placed into an induced coma. Jacob and Grace had visited every day, filling her in on the department gossip and their antics at home. Zoe had called Jacob and Grace into the ED earlier that morning as Connie slowly began to wake from the coma. Jacob and Grace raced to the hospital to be greeted by Zoe on their arrival, "Hello Grace, Jacob." "What's wrong, is it mum?" Grace asked, the panic evident in her voice. "Your mum's doing well Grace, we're taking very good care of her, I promise. We've been able to reduce the sedation and bring her off the ventilator. She's shown quite remarkable progress but you may find that she is still a bit confused and cranky-" "Cranky – nothing new there then, eh Grace?" Jacob joked. "Now is not the time for wisecracks, Jacob. I need you to be prepared that Connie may be distressed when she first sees you." Grace and Jacob followed Zoe into Connie's room. "Connie, it's Zoe. Jacob and Grace are here to see you. I'm going to let you spend some time with them, and I'll come and see you later." "J?" Connie groaned, "Grace?" "I'll leave you both to it – call if you need me", Zoe added, turning to Jacob. "Thanks Zo", he replied. Jacob rushed to Connie's side, "Hey babe, hey, it's OK beautiful. Look who's got you" he said reassuringly, gently stroking her hair. Connie became restless, trying to sit up, "Grace, where's Grace? "Jacob helped her to sit up, rearranging the pillows to support her back. "She's right here Con. Come here, Grace." Grace stood with back pressed firmly against the door, fear etched across her face." "It's OK sweetheart, it's just the drugs making her a little disorientated. Come on, it's alright." Grace walked towards Connie. "Mum?" "Come here baby" she croaked. "Give your mum a cuddle?" Grace gently wrapped her arms around Connie but quickly let go and sat on Jacob's lap. "Since when did you two get on so well?" Connie asked. "Well, let's just say that me and your mini me here have come to an understanding. Ain't that right, Mini-B?" Grace nodded, giving her mum a slight smile. "Oh, is that so…? When can I get out of here?" she said, with a large sigh. "Not for another week, one step at a time Con, yeah? I know it's hard being the patient, but you'll soon be back bossing everyone around. In the meantime, me and Grace here are going to take extra special care of you." Connie opened her mouth as if to speak but was quickly silenced by Jacob, "no arguments!"
One week later and Connie was ready to be discharged. Jacob had gone to the hospital to collect Connie while Grace was at school, despite many protests for her to accompany him. Connie was sat on the edge of the bed, her bag beside her. "Hey you" he said, before walking towards her and standing in front of her, arms outstretched, "ready to go home?" He helped her to stand before enveloping her into a hug and gently rubbing her back. "I love you so much babe, he whispered. I love you so so much" "Thank you, for everything Jacob. For taking care of Grace… for taking care of me." "You don't need to thank me Con." "I do" she replied, tears glistening in her eyes. "Don't get upset babe" he said gently, wiping the tears that had started to fall. "Come here." Jacob pulled her towards him once more, placing kisses in her hair as she rested her head against his chest. "Everything is going to be just fine babe, I promise. Me, you and Grace. Just us." "Are you sure that this is what you want? Now is your chance to go." "Hey, where has this come from? Look at me, come on Connie, look at me." Connie lifted her head from his chest. "I'm not sure how much you heard during mine and Grace's visits but believe me when I say I love you Connie. I love you and I will always be by your side, no matter how many times you try and push me away. Grace and I had a long chat while you were sleeping. I understand why she reacted the way she did when she found out about us, but she also understands how much I love you. I'll leave her to explain." "OK", she replied, "And J?" "Yes, babe?" "I love you too. I know, I know I find it hard to say, but I do love you Jacob. I don't care whether you went to private school or not, I don't care whether you're a Nurse, a Doctor, a Banker, whatever. I love you. I love you because you always know how to make me smile, always know how to comfort me when I'm stressed or upset, but also when to leave me alone. Most importantly, you have been there for me when everyone else would have walked away." Connie's voice began to falter as tears rolled down her cheeks. "You've, you've shown me h-how it feels t-to be loved, and n-not just a fleeting moment of lust. No-one has ever, ever loved me in the way that you do. This, us, it was never a fling Jacob, she said, stroking his cheek, tears continuing to cascade down her face: "This is the real deal."