Once upon a time there were three very important people, DI Lestrade, Mrs. Hudson, and John Watson. One day they decided to go for a walk. While they were gone a suffering drug addict wandered along and let himself into their house, his name was Sherly-locks. Upon seeing the Chinese takeout they left on the table he realized how hungry he was and are it all up, the hot, the cold, and the just right. After eating, Sherly-locks tried to fight off boredom by picking up a nearby gun and shooting the walls. When that didn't work Sherly-locks realized then that he was also very tired and looked for a place to sleep, he didn't make it very far though and ended up kipping on the sofa.
When the three friends got back they were surprised by what they found.
"OI!" shouted Lestrade. "Someone ate our Chinese food!"
"Oh dear!" Exclaimed Mrs. Hudson. "Look what they did to my bloody walls!"
John said nothing, but smiled softly at the addict sleeping soundly on the sofa.
When Sherly-locks awake it was agreed that he would stay with the trio, provided that he stay away from the drugs. It was a deal that he eagerly accepted. Living with Sherly-locks was not easy as he was a very erratic man (John held the record for being able to stand him the longest), and bored easily. He seemed insufferable, lazy, and rude, and though he didn't (couldn't) express it openly, he really did care for the three.
Life went on and the trio learned to handle Sherly-locks better, but all good things must come to an end and so it did for poor Sherly-locks.
One day, about a year later, while Lestrade, Mrs. Hudson, and John were out doing whatever it is they do (Sherly-locks really can't be bothered to find out what) a man came to the door. Actually, you see, 'man' is perhaps not the best word to decide him, Sherly-locks prefers the term Spider. The man (spider) knocked on the door and Sherly-locks, in regular Sherly-locks fashion, yelled for Mrs. Hudson to answer it. When the man kept knocking, Sherly-locks tried yelling for Lestrade, then for John, but as none of these people were home, no one answered the door. Eventually Sherly-locks just yelled for them to go away, but the insistent knocking continued until Sherly-locks stormed to the door and threw it open.
"WHAT!" He yelled, coming up short when he saw what awaited him outside.
The spider stood in the center of the garden smiling wickedly. His brother, Iceman, stood at the end of the garden near the woods looking apologetic. But it was neither of these that stopped Sherly-locks in his tracks, but rather it was the three bodies lying in the dirt, bullet holes in their temples.
"I told you I would burn you, Sherly." The spider said.
John's blank eyes were staring right at Sherly-locks, and he couldn't bring himself to look away.