Hello guys! I am back, with a new story! This one focuses on Nessie, and her struggles with coping with everything in her life. Pretty much. ;) Now, I'm going to allocate a song to every chapter I post; because it was inspiration/I was listening to it while writing/the lyrics fit with the chapter. You don't have to have read my other story to read this, though of course you are more than welcome to. And so, without further ado, I give you: Never Let You Go, chapter one. Enjoy, and please review!

(P.S. I do not own the Twilight Saga or any of its characters. Wish I did, but I don't. So I will have to stick with just borrowing it.)

"Absence diminishes small loves and increases great ones, as the wind blows out the candle and fans the bonfire." -François Duc de La Rochefoucauld

Chapter One: Reflections

Make you feel my love - Adele

"Boo," a deep voice said from behind me. My heart sped up as I jumped in fright. I put my books in my locker and turned around to see Jake, who was leaning casually against the wall, smiling impishly.

"Stop doing that," I accused, hitting him round the head with a book. He chuckled, and replied,

"You're so cute when you're angry." My heart fluttered at the small compliment. Recently, everything Jake said or did made me feel like I should be embarrassed, in a good way. I looked up at him from under my eyelashes and said,

"I'm not angry. You just made me jump." Jake cocked his head to one side and asked concernedly,

"What made you so preoccupied that even your supernatural senses couldn't hear me arrive?"

"I just have a lot of work to do, what with the end of the semester and everything," I replied glumly. Jake wrinkled his nose, clearly trying to avoid the subject.

"I'm sure you've got nothing to worry about," he said. It was true; while I managed to maintain an A average without putting in too much effort, Jacob was barely passing his subjects, and most of the teachers had pretty much given up on him. He leaned back, his arms folded over his chest. He wore a black t-shirt that stretched across his broad chest, dark jeans, and an old pair of Doc Martens. I got the impression that he was trying to show off his biceps to the group of cheerleaders who had just passed by. I raised my eyebrows, saying bitterly,

"You could try actually asking them out." I slightly regretted mentioning that; there was a part of me that wanted him to reject the offer. I felt kind of possessive towards Jacob. I always had. I thought it was just because of the fact that I had grown up with him. He would always be 'My Jacob', no matter how many girls he dated. Jake turned around, leaned towards me, and looked me in the eye, saying fervently,

"There's only one girl who I would even think about asking out." I blinked a few times at his proximity. I could see his lips quite clearly. I wondered what they would feel like under my own. It would be so easy just to lean forward and find out... I shook the thought from my head, instead thinking about how there were some things that Jacob said to me that were said with such intensity, it made me feel almost uncomfortable.

"Really?" I challenged, forcing myself away from him and focusing my attention on my locker instead.

"Of course," he replied, and I could feel his gaze on me. Trying to shove the last of my books into my locker, I managed to let them come loose, and they all cascaded to the floor. I bent down to retrieve them, and of course Jacob crouched down to help me. I reached for my mother's battered copy of Wuthering Heights at the same time as him, and our fingers brushed against each other. I swallowed loudly, and kept my gaze on the book. I could tell that Jacob was looking at me, and so I waited until he had released the book before I made eye contact.

"Thanks," I mumbled, finally closing my locker with a snap.

"Your Mom liked that book," he remarked quietly.

"Yeah. It's her copy," I replied equally quietly. There were a few moments of silence, and then Jacob looked at his watch and pointed out,

"We've got class in five minutes. I shouldn't be late. Mr. Roberts already hates me enough." I took a deep breath and said,

"Well, I'm just going to go to the bathroom. Save me a seat."

"Always do," he responded with a grin, walking towards the science lab with his bag slung lazily over his shoulder, papers spilling out the top, and a bottle of Dr Pepper poking out. I made my way to the bathroom and thought about Jacob. I suppose, to everyone else, it would have looked like Jake and I were dating, but in truth, we weren't. Sure, we spent a lot of time together, and there was definitely a bit of flirting going on, especially from Jake, and it would be a lie to say that the thought of having a relationship with him hadn't crossed my mind, but we weren't a couple. We would be soon, though, if I had it my way. My dad was strict about these things, and he didn't really like Jake for some reason. Besides, I couldn't even tell if Jacob liked me back; he flirted with every girl he spoke to, and was 'touchy-feely' to anyone who would respond. Besides that, nearly every girl in every grade liked him, I could tell. We were in eleventh grade, and even the seniors flirted with him whenever they had the chance. He was seen as the brooding bad boy, though of course I knew different. Behind the motorcycle and the leather jacket and the DMs was a cheerful, kind guy, who I loved spending time with. Not that I didn't have my fair share of admirers. Boys liked me because I was interesting to them. I wasn't the usual blonde, bubbly type. I looked in the mirror at my reflection. I had dark lips that contrasted with my pale skin. My long, curly hair was pulled up into a messy ponytail, and its dark bronze colour glinted red in the sun. My skin was almost luminescent in direct sunlight, and though I had pale skin, I never burned. I wore an open grey plaid shirt over a black tank top, dark skinny jeans, and purple hi-top Converse. I knew I had a nice body; sometimes I would catch the guys admiring me during sports, and I was always flattered, though a little embarrassed. Another thing; I was good at sports, but I had to be careful not to draw attention to myself with my speed and agility. I loved to dance, although once again, I had to make sure I wasn't pulled up upon my apparent ability to perform ballet as if I had been studying it for my entire life. I was perfectly sociable, but I definitely preferred to curl up in a corner and read a book than go to a party. Better yet; hang out with Jacob, but sometimes he had patrols to run.

I sighed heavily. Sometimes it was difficult to live my life. There were so many things I couldn't share with people, couldn't say or do. I constantly had to be careful about what I said about my family. We had been living in Bellingham for two years now, and it was the perfect place for my small family. The city, where both my parents worked, was always bustling with people, and I loved visiting the Old Town and looking in antique shops and bookstores. My mom, Bella, worked as an editor of a local newspaper, and she loved it, and Dad, Edward, worked as a lawyer, where he could use his mind-reading skills to help with his job. Bellingham was good for my parents, as it was one of the places on the continental US with the least amount of sunshine per year. We would surely draw attention to ourselves if we lived in, say, Arizona, and Mom and Dad stepped into the sunlight and started to sparkle like a couple of living disco balls. Um, no thanks. Nevertheless, I still dreamed of living in the sun, perhaps in a cottage by the sea, where I could wake up to the fresh air of the coast. Oh well; it wasn't like I didn't enjoy living in Bellingham. Especially with Jacob living in an apartment nearby, I actually loved living there.

The bell rang and I jumped, dropping my eyeliner on the ground. I hastily picked it up and ran to class, apologising to Mr. Roberts for my tardiness. I sank into a seat next to Jacob that he had helpfully saved for me. I shot him a small smile in thanks, and turned in my chair to face Mr. Roberts. After a while, he separated us into pairs and told us to ask each other revision questions for the rest of the lesson. Translated: "I'm too lazy to teach today, so you might as well talk amongst yourselves." Not that I was complaining. I turned around so I could look at Jake, and he grinned at me. Then he chuckled quietly and said,

"You've got, uh, a bit of eyeliner on your cheek."

"Oops," I said, touching my cheek, trying to rid it of the mark.

"Here, let me," he said helpfully, leaning towards me and reaching for my cheek. He slowly rubbed my cheek, smiling, and then he stopped, his fingers lingering on my skin. I made eye contact with him, and found an incomprehensible look in his eyes. We stared at each other for a few seconds, and I could hear my heart pumping loudly. All too soon, Jacob pulled away, and said,

"There. All gone." My heart continued to pound, though the blush started to recede from my cheeks. I smiled at him in thanks. The rest of the lesson was a blur of our usual conversation, and when the bell rang, he walked me to my locker.

"Hey, why don't you have a birthday party?" He asked me, out of the blue.

"Excuse me?" I asked politely.

"You know, it's your..." He lowered his voice, and then continued with, "Sixth birthday next week." I wrinkled my nose, and explained,

"I'm not really up for a party. I have so much work to do, and I'm so stressed out, and-" Jacob placed his hand carefully over my mouth and said, smiling,

"And that's exactly why you need a party." He removed his hand from my mouth and instead placed both of his hands on my shoulders, and said, "Come on, Ness. You know I'm right." I waited a few seconds, and then, rolling my eyes, said,

"Yes, you are. Now let's go back to my place. Mom's making lasagne."

"Seriously? I've always loved Bella's lasagne."

"Well then let's go," I said, moving away from my locker. As we walked back to my car – Jake had ridden with me on the way to school that morning – Jake looked at me and said,

"You look like your mom when you wear plaid shirts. I remember she always used to wear them. Of course, you wear them best," he added with a smile. I slid into the driver's seat and started to wonder just how much time Jacob and my mom had actually spent together when they were younger. My reverie was broken by a strange wailing sound. I turned to look at Jake, who was busy singing along to an AC/DC song, apparently oblivious to the fact that he sounded like a dying cat.

"Oh god, please stop," I complained, putting my hands over my ears.

"Hey, eyes on the road, hands on the wheel, missy," Jacob said, smiling.

"Why? You scared?" I challenged.

"I'm scared for the car, honey. I'm pretty sure you would be fine if we had a car accident. The car, on the other hand..."

"Okay, fine," I said, resigned, and then put my hands back on the steering wheel, "Happy?" Jacob leaned towards me in the small space, and said,

"Much better," his hot breath blowing in my face. I forced myself to stay composed, and tried to think of a new subject for conversation.

"So. The party? When's it going to be?" I asked, concentrating on the road ahead of me, though with my fast reflexes I didn't technically need to.

"You're serious about this party?" He asked.

"Well, you were the one who suggested it, weren't you?" I replied, my eyebrows raised.

"Yeah, I was. And you know what? You leave everything to me. I'll speak to Alice and she can help me organise. I'm sure she'd like to visit her favourite niece anyway. So just don't worry about a thing." He assured me. I couldn't help but be a bit afraid. Jake, organising a party? God help us.

"Bells!" Jake cried as he came through the front door. Mom came out from the kitchen, wearing an apron and looking just like a regular housewife should, aside from the fact that she was stunningly beautiful. Her eyes lit up when she saw him and she rushed over to him to give him a hug, which he returned with a laugh.

"Ugh, gosh, you stink, Jake. When was the last time you took a shower?" She asked, her nose wrinkled. I rolled my eyes. The subject of Jacob's odour always confused me. To Mom and Dad, and all my other Cullen family, Jake smelt terrible, like 'wet dog' apparently. To me, however, he smelt like...Well, he smelt like Jacob. Like the forest and fresh air and wood and grass. Not an unappealing smell, in my mind.

"I actually showered this morning, thank you very much!" He said indignantly. They laughed together and I said,

"I'm going to go put my bag in my room. You coming, Jake?" Without looking up, Jake replied,

"Uh, I'm gonna speak to your Mom a little, if that's okay?" I shrugged and moved slowly up the stairs to my room. Sometimes, Jacob confused me. I just didn't understand him. Sometimes I would feel that he actually liked me, you know, liked me. Other times I saw him with Mom and got this uneasy feeling that he liked her more than me. Maybe I was being paranoid. I just didn't think it was normal for the guy you liked to hang out with your mom so much, and to know so much about her. I heard them laughing downstairs and I flopped back on my bed, kicking my shoes off. I lay there for a while, just thinking, until I heard Dad come through the front door. I flew down the stairs and greeted him with a big hug. I put my hand to his cheek and showed him a picture of Mom and Jake laughing together. He could feel the uncertainty in my mind, and smiled to show he understood.

"I'll talk to her," he whispered, though of course they could both hear.

"Edward!" Mom shouted, rushing out of the living room and wrapping her arms around him tenderly, "How was work?"

"It, uh, well, it was sort of difficult. There was this one guy who was blatantly lying, although the jury didn't see it that way, and I just couldn't find the proof to show them otherwise. You know, it's the Lee Johnson case that I've been working on for a few months now? Yeah, well, it's getting a lot more difficult to prove he's innocent. Gosh, sometimes I wish humans would be a bit more observant. It's irritating beyond belief," he finished with a slight smile.

"Hey, not all humans are unobservant," Jake said, coming into the hallway.

"Oh, hello Jacob. I thought I smelled wet dog," Dad said slyly.

"Be nice!" Mom and I said in unison. I cringed at the thought of us both caring for Jacob in the same way. Dad caught my eye, and I knew that he had read my thoughts.

"I should be going now anyway," Jacob said, grabbing his jacket from the banister and looking at me apologetically. I bit down on my lip. I was hurt that he'd spent more time with my mom than with me. He gave Mom a hug and whispered, "About what we were talking about earlier. I think it's time to tell her." He looked scared, and she looked worried. She nodded in agreement, and walked back to the living room. I couldn't help but wonder what it was that he needed to tell me. I had a feeling it was bad news. I tried not to dwell on it. Jacob leaned in and gave me a one-armed hug and a kiss on the cheek. Normally, that would have sent my heart into overdrive, but that time, I just stood where I was, not responding. He looked confused, and just a little hurt. Good, I thought, then immediately took it back. I didn't want Jacob to hurt, ever. I started to walk back up the stairs. "Bye, Edward," he said politely to my father, and opened the front door. My Dad grabbed his arm and said in a low voice, clearly hoping I wasn't listening,

"Look, I know that you and Bella had...something in the past, but it is over now, do you understand? I can't have you hurting Renesmee over some stupid thing like that." Jacob looked angry and shot back, all politeness gone,

"I would never hurt her. And I'm going to tell her. About our relationship. Where we stand. She will know everything. And then she can make her choice."

"Jacob, don't do it now. She's so stressed, and if you bring back these things from the past, she won't take them lightly. She's not ready." Dad practically begged.

"I'm going to do it, Edward," Jacob said, finality ringing in his tone, and he walked out the front door. I ran down the stairs and saw my dad looking annoyed.

"What was all that about?" I asked, paranoia plaguing me.

"Nothing for you to worry about," he answered, faking a smile.

"Tell me. Please," I asked. Dad sighed heavily and replied,

"He's no good for you, Renesmee. Besides, it's not my place to tell you. It's Jacob's or your mom's." And with that small sentence, my worst fears became clear: Jacob was in love with my mother.

Like it? I hope so. Don't worry, it gets more interesting. Please review! Much appreciated. P.S. The Cullen house in Bellingham: (I can't actually decide whether to go for completely modern or old, with character. Help me pick?)

The old house:

.com/photos/daily-bungalow/3412233115/

The modern house:

.com/modern-house/the-davis-residence-in-bellingham-by-miller-hull/