Operation R.E.L.P Novelisation
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Prologue
The hallway…that blasted hallway…it seemed like it stretched on for miles. The walls lined with lockers containing all kinds of terrible machinations crafted by the Kaiser and his lab rats. At the end of the hall lies a door which leads to the prison cells below. But that is not my destination. No, a far worse fate awaits me – death. But not a quick and painless end, oh no…the Kaiser, in his twisted brilliance, has devised drugs that let his victims stay alive and conscious without the need for oxygen. He lets them hang there, choking and suffering, sometimes for days. And that is to be my fate once I reach the end of the hallway. That hallway was where this all began – my death, my rebirth, and my failure. My name is Scooby Doo and this is the story of how I died.
Chapter 1
After what seemed like an eternity, we reached the end of the hallway and entered a large chamber, lined with chairs. Often, the Kaiser likes to watch his victims hang; sometimes inviting other members of his private bourgeoisie to join him. But not today – I have no audience. I've heard stories of hangers putting on a show, trying to please the Kaiser and his guests in a final attempt to hold onto life. But he doesn't care. To him, the life of another is worth nothing. After living for centuries, the Kaiser believes he has transcended life.
You may wonder what crimes one must commit to receive a fate such as this. Well, it's simple – oppose the regime of the Kaiser in any way, shape, or form and you qualify for a gruesome end. Sure, that may not be the official story – the Kaiser will tell some cock and bull story to appease what remains of the traditional legal system. But it's all a lie. After living so long on borrowed time, he's paranoid – scared of everyone and everything taking his precious life away from him. Maybe that's why he revels in the slaughter of others. Maybe in some twisted way, he thinks their end means his continued existence.
My executioner carries me to the front of the room where the gallows sit, waiting to engorge their next victim. He places me on a chair underneath and reaches upwards, pulling down the rope. He slowly ties the noose around my neck, and tightens it forcefully, choking me. Finally…he pulls the chair away, and I fall towards the ground. Instantly, the pain overcomes me. I gasp for air, but it is futile. As my body dangles weightless in the air, my lifeless eyes stare out at the empty room – the horror of my situation finally sinks in. All I can do is wait…
Chapter 2
But in the court of the Kaiser, death does not come swift. I experienced another of his little games. You see, he likes to mess with the minds of his victims, make them think they're losing their minds. He moves them between locations, sometimes even offering hope of help or escape. But it's a trap, one of his many cruel devices of torture. After blacking out, I opened my eyes to find myself in a different room. I stood high above the desks and chairs that filled the room. The walls were painted with many colours and creatures. It was designed to inflame the senses, make you see things that aren't really there. My memory of the experience is limited, however. The only thing I can remember is the camel…as I stared at it, my vision blurred and I found myself once again slipping out of consciousness.
Chapter 3
When I awoke, I found myself tied to a tree, high above the ground. The sun shone brightly in my eyes, blinding me. Now, in addition to keeping his victims alive throughout the hanging, the Kaiser's drug also has hallucinogenic properties. I recall feeling like the world was spinning around me; like I could feel the rotations of the Earth as I dangled in the sky. And then an explosion of colours…red, green, blue, purple, and so many others – my eyes burned as if they were on fire. Finally, everything went black and the world once more moved around me.
Chapter 4
This time however, I wasn't even sure if I was conscious. The room was completely black, with the exception of one small but blinding light source aimed directly at me. Avoiding direct eye-contact with the light, I looked to the walls. The light moved, trying to follow my gaze, and this made the shadows dance on the walls – including my own. As I looked upon my own silhouette, saw the pitiful state I was in, I reflected upon my life…and how this unfortunate fate befell me. Suddenly, I no longer cared about my vendetta against the Kaiser anymore. I simply dreamt of returning home one last time…returning to my family…one…last…time…
Chapter 5
I awoke once more to the blinding sun – it was a new day. A lush, green field stretched out around me. At first, I was struck by the loneliness and emptiness present in such a large and quiet place – but then it hit me. The next wave of hallucinations – the Kaiser wanted me to truly suffer. It felt like I was being bombarded by heavy objects. It may have only been an illusion, but the pain of every one of those strikes is etched into my jaw. Eventually, I could no longer take the punishment and lost consciousness.
Chapter 6
The end was near now – I could feel it. I had been returned to my place of origin – the gallows in that large, empty room. Darkness was overcoming me, slowly but surely, and I wished only for this torment to end. I no longer had the strength to wish for rescue or escape or even to think of happier times – I was an empty husk. It wasn't long before the cold embrace of death took me, and the pain finally ended. But if only that had been the end of things…my journey, you see, was long from finished – and the Kaiser's execution methods were only a small sampling of the trials that were to come.