"Dean's not gonna like it, Catherine," Sam said, as he glanced at his brother asleep in the back seat.
Catherine's hand drifted up to press against her forehead. She felt chilled again; the fever had been coming and going for the last day. Her back was aching and her chest was so congested that she was taking half breaths. Catherine shot a glance at the rearview and noted that Dean was still sound asleep.
Catherine ignored her issues and put her foot to the pedal, picking up speed. She had told Bobby they'd make it and she'd be damned if Dean's stubbornness would ruin it. "Listen, Sam, I promised. I've never let Bobby spend Christmas alone and I'm not about to start." If possible Catherine seemed to urge the Impala to an even greater speed.
"Yeah, but you're still not well, that cold you've been fighting keeps getting worse," Sam said, looking at her flushed cheeks. "Christmas is in one day, there's no way we're going to make it. Jesus, Catherine, slow down. You crash her and you can forget ever celebrating Christmas again." Sam winced, as he heard himself refer to the car in the feminine.
Catherine's eyes never left the road; the Impala surged thru the night eating up the miles. She would make it, she never broke a promise. This time Catherine wasn't willing to back down. The Winchester brothers were in for a fight if they expected her to disappoint Bobby.
888
Bobby moved to the living room windows once again, twitching aside the blinds to reveal the empty driveway. Every year it was the same thing, he told himself that she may not make it. He prepared himself for it. And yet every year since she was nineteen she had made it. Sometimes the hand on the clock had declared only an hour left till the official day was over but still she made it.
He turned from the window and once again went through the list that she had sent him the other week. He needed to be sure everything was ready, she was counting on him.
888
Catherine had noticed the flurries in the sky about an hour ago, but hadn't let herself think about it. Then the flurries had become snow, again she had ignored it and kept the car moving. Now however, she could no longer ignore the fact that the storm had become a squall. She was barely moving anymore, steadily losing the lead that she had gained with her earlier breakneck speed.
She looked over at Sam; he was hunched against the door sound asleep. Dean was curled up in the back seat, still trying to catch up on the sleep that he had missed over the last couple of days.
Catherine had to admit, that as good as she was, no one could compare to Dean Winchester when it came to just moving forward. No matter what was put in his way, he just kept going. He was a true warrior when it came to those that needed his protection.
Catherine grimaced as she squinted, her already exhausted eyes, trying to see through the snow that blew from all sides. Sam was right Dean was going to be royally pissed. He had only laid down and fallen asleep once she had sworn several times that she would only drive till she found a motel and then wake him.
He was suspicious about her, cold. He knew she was feeling worse than she let on and he had declared that she was too sick to make it all the way home to Bobby's. Catherine snorted, who the hell was he to issue orders. Catherine had a feeling that lately she had followed Dean's orders a little too well; he apparently felt that she was falling in line with his image of a good soldier.
Well, piss on that, Dean was in for a big surprise. She hadn't gone toe to toe with one of the Winchester boys in a while. It was about time to remind them, just who was meaner. Catherine had no doubt in her heart who would win.
"What the Hell, Catherine?" Dean shouted, as he suddenly sat up in the back seat and got a good look at all the snow.
Catherine about jumped out of her skin. The Impala actually spun slightly and Catherine quickly adjusted the wheel bringing the car back under control. "God Damn, Dean, are you trying to give me a heart attack, and watch the volume Sam's sleeping," Catherine snapped.
"Pull over this instance, of all the harebrained ideas you've gotten stuck in your head over the past couple of months this takes the cake. You swore to me, hell, you swore on Sam, that you would just drive to the nearest hotel," Dean said, leaning forward over the front seat, elbowing Sam in his agitation.
"I won't," Catherine said, as she continued her slow crawl thru the snow. "You don't understand, Dean. I have to be there. I will."
Dean suddenly leaned in closer taking one look at her glazed eyes. He quickly reached up and felt her forehead; it was hot to the touch, not just warm, but hot. "Catherine, you swore to me, on Sammy's life that you would find a hotel. On Sammy, Catherine. Now pull over." Dean's anger was a palpable thing it was rolling off of him in waves.
Catherine slammed on the brakes, the car sliding sideways in the snow. She threw the car in park, opened the driverside door and got out of the car. She was walking off into the snow, before either Dean or Sam, who had just had his head banged against the window, could realize it.
"What the hell, Dean, Jesus man, she's sick, what did you do to her," Sam snapped, quickly following Catherine out the car door.
"Sam, wait," Dean called.
Sam hesitated for a moment turning reluctantly from Catherine's retreating back. "She's being ridiculess, Sam, she lied and manipulated me, now here we are stuck in the middle of nowhere and it's her fault. Just get in the car; she'll back down trust me."
"Dean, who are you talking about. You know perfectly well that woman will kill herself before she backs down. Why can't you just cut the crap and help her get to Bobby's, she feels she needs to be there, that should be enough for you." Sam no longer able to ignore Catherine took off after her.
888
As Catherine walked she mumbled to herself, this was a habit she'd had since she was a kid. She was a ranter by nature, quick to anger, quick to vent, quick to cool. This time though, this time she just didn't think she would be able to shuck off her anger with a good yelling match, or even in some physical way. Usually, when her mood was this black, she let out the anger and started all over again, calmer, in sync once again.
Not this time though. Over the last months she had sacrificed him again, and again. Allowed, him to endanger himself in order to keep Sam safe, at least as safe as possible in this job. She had stood back, and made decisions, that went against every grain in her body. Put all her energy into Sam, knowing that that was what Dean needed from her.
She had gone far and beyond what could be expected of a girl in love. And she had done it gladly, knowing that without Sam, Dean, the Dean she loved would not exist. But now here she was finally asking for something for herself. Something she needed and he was refusing. Catherine felt her world shake, she knew his priorities, she understood them, but this was different, this was within his reach and he had refused her. Well, he would learn God hath no fury...
888
Dean was becoming worried, he had gotten back into the car expecting Catherine to come back, head hanging ready to apologize. Over the last couple of months he had become used to her obeying his orders without hesitation. He knew what she needed, why she didn't get it, he didn't understand. He knew that she was too sick, that their wasn't enough time to make it to Bobby's and really why should it matter to her. She wasn't alone, Christmas would still happen, why wasn't he enough? Why did she need more?
Christmas meant close to nothing to Dean, not anymore. As a kid he had done everything he could to try to make the day special for Sam. But as Sam had grown it had just become too much to hold together. So little by little, year by year he had let it go. Sam hadn't complained and lately they had just been happy to be together on Christmas.
Dean saw Sammy emerge from the snow in front of him, and he felt a surge of relief. Sam wouldn't leave Catherine out in the snow. She must be right behind him. Dean leaned toward the passenger side door as it swung open.
Sam slid into the Impala and immediately upped the heater holding his hands against the vents. He took a deep breathe and looked at Dean. "I can't find her. I went up quite a ways and I can't find her. I was following her footprints and they just ended, Dean." Sam leaned over the seat and rooted around on the floor of the Impala picking up a flashlight, gloves and his coat.
Dean grabbed Sam's arm and twisted him around. "What do you mean they just end? She's got to be there."
Sam shrugged out of Dean's grip and allowed the anger he was feeling toward Dean to escape. "Can you feel her Dean? I can't not at all." At the site of Dean's stricken eyes, Sam realized that Dean wans't able feel Catherine either.
Dean realized that Sam was right. What they had lovingly called her lojack was gone. He couldn't feel her pull. Granted for the last week her power had been shaky at best. But she had still been there, always in the back of his mind, comforting and constant.
Sam snorted in frustration. "I've got to find her, she's really sick and it's freezing out. There's a turn off just ahead with a sign for an inn. Just get the Impala there and I'll meet you at the hotel when I find her."
At this point Sam's eyes grew even angrier. "She hasn't asked you for anything since the day you two met. She's given everything she is to you and you've done nothing in kind. She's had nothing her whole life. What she has Bobby gave to her. It would have taken nothing on your part to help her get to him. Now instead she's not only going to miss being with him, she'll be lucky she doesn't spend Christmas in the hospital." At this Sam slammed out of the car and started down the road, flashlight bobbing and weaving as he tried to follow the hunter's footprints.
