Disclaimer: I do not own Stargate Universe.

Rodney McKay made his way to Dr Weir's office, thinking back to the last time he'd been there, just after he'd blown up almost an entire solar system. Elisabeth didn't seem so angry this time though, so he figured she wasn't about to reprimand him again. After all, he'd learned his lesson. No more playing around with things even the all-mighty Ancients didn't know how to use. Period.

However he didn't come in immediately, overhearing an argument going on inside. Sheppard and Weir, disagreeing about something. He decided it would be wiser to wait it out.

He didn't mean to spy, but his name caught his attention. They were arguing about him.

"Anyway, Rodney's on his way. I called him."

"You can't possibly want to tell him, can you ?"

"And why not ?"

"It's downright cruel, that's why! It would serve no purpose whatsoever!"

"How about making him face what he did ? Elisabeth, he doesn't even get it! He's still acting like a prat!"

'Am not!' thought Rodney. Well, not more than Sheppard, anyway. The man still hadn't forgiven him, and it had been two weeks. Seriously, how long was he planning on holding that grudge ? Everyone made mistakes.

"And would you rather him being depressed ? I thought he was your friend."

"You're right, he was."

Rodney forced himself not to react at that. He knew perfectly well he had lost whatever affection the military man might have held for him. He couldn't take it anymore, though. He knocked twice, cutting Weir's answer.

"You wanted to see me ma'am?"

"Actually colonel Sheppard was the one who summoned you. Rodney… what we have to tell you isn't pleasant, in fact I'd rather not telling you at all, but as the crew of the Deadalus knows this and I think it will be better if you didn't learn it by someone else, I have no other choice."

"Well, what is it ?" he asked, wishing she'd stop circling around it and just spit it.

She didn't say anything, though, and looked up at John for help.

'Must be real bad, then' he thought, now more scared than curious. Finally, John spoke up, not looking at him.

"McKay, when the Deadalus beamed us out of there" (he didn't need to say where "there" was) "the sensors picked up many life signs on a planet nearby."

Rodney paled. He asked, his voice shaking "How many?"

"Thousands", Weir replied. "I'm sorry Rodney. The planet was destroyed."

"By me" said Rodney. It wasn't a question. Weir answered anyway.

"To be fair, it wasn't entirely your fault, Rodney…"

"Yes, of course. Well, thank you for telling me, Elisabeth, Sheppard. I'll just… if you'll excuse me, I'll just go back to my quarters now."

Without waiting for an answer, he left the office, without bothering to close the door. He desperately needed to be alone right now.

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