Lance still didn't know.
Keith sat on the other side of the table, following Lances every move as the dark-skinned paladin leaned forward to grab food placed all around the table. Keith couldn't stop himself from searching towards the paladin's eyes, hoping he would look straight at him, if only for a second.
Lance blinked and smiled as he replied to Hunk's comment.
Now he laughed.
Keith wanted so bad to join in on the conversation, his heart kept pushing him to grab the chance. Grab it, smile, add a comment.
The moment he could join in, flew past him. Lance looked at Keith for a split second, and stopped smiling.
Only for a split second. Then he turned to Pidge, ignoring Keith again.
His heart sank.
Lance still didn't know.
He did not know how much Keith was pining for him.
Biting his own lips, he furrowed his brows and kept his thoughts to himself. If Lance was ignoring him like that, then he could do it too. It's fine.
Also, him having a crush could only be a problem in their teamwork. If Lance didn't reciprocate his feelings, he'd like to throw himself into a wormhole and stay there.
He began to pout, not noticing that Lance and Shiro had noticed his sudden drop of mood. None of them pointed it out, as they thought they were the only ones noticing.
.
"Okay team, we will be visiting a new planet today and form an aliance there. These aliens are an important part of our coalition, as they are very powerful and with a lot of influence in neighboring planets. So we need you guys on your best behavior." Shiro began their meeting, opening up for Allura to continue the information flow. She nodded.
"The planet is called Abox, and it's residents are called Hoobyxes. They look very much like you humans, but they are buffer, and in a lot of..different colours. They are also very aggressive in having it their own way, so if they want anything from us, we must stay on their side. If we refuse, they might drop the whole coalition and attack us instead! That is why we have to be on their good side, no matter what."
"That is why you all need to prepare, both mentally and physically. Keith, let go of your blade and put it in your room here in the castle. Pidge, either get a pair of lenses or.. Wait you don't really need glasses, nevermind."
Shiro nudged his fingertips at his nose, feeling his own mind laughing at his forgetfulness. Pidge and Hunk had a hard time keeping the smirks from showing.
Allura coughed and tried to get everyone's attention again. Her mouth was curved in a smile too, but refused to admit it.
"Sorry Pidge," Shiro sighed as he smiled at her.
"Back to business. Everyone should be getting ready for this visit. Put on your pretty clothes! Coran and I have picked out some suitable altean fashion, so we hope you all like it."
Meeting dismissed.
.
Keith looked at Lances back as they walked out of the room. His hair was getting longer in the neck, causing twirls and curls.
He looked good. The little twirl at the nape of his neck looked so soft and pretty, he just wanted to put his finger inside it and twist, feeling the softness on his skin.
"Eh, Keith?" Keith blinked, and realized his hand was reaching for Lances. Now Lance was about to turn around towards him.
Keith froze up.
"If there is something you want to tell me, please say it instead of bottling up, okay?" Lance looked straight into Keith's eyes.
His eyes were gray, almost like his aura had weakened within the minutes since they were dismissed. The small, usually ocean blue irises didn't glow as powerful as they did during dinner.
Was he tired?
Wait was Lance onto his feelings for him?!
Did Lance know that Keith had those feelings for him?
Play it cool, play it cool. Don't get worked up, stay cool! Should he flee? Should he stay to talk it out, maybe even learn what Lance thought of him?
But what if Lance didn't like him, and that's what he would be saying if Keith tried to confess?
He'd rather stay in that wormhole forever.
He furrowed his brows and squinted hostile towards Lance. No way he allow himself to be turned down today.
"Sure." he nodded quickly, taking long steps to get past Lance in the hallway. His steps were loud, and they kept getting louder as he kept walking.
Why was he such a dumbass?
.
Screaming into his pillow, the galra tried to let out his anger at himself. He wanted to unleash his anger in the training room, but Lance was there. The pillow would do for now.
Why was he so stupid? Of course Lance wouldn't turn him down with such a sentence, he just wanted to know if something was up! He wanted to talk!
Stupid. Idiot. Naive fucking redneck. Dad would turn in his grave. Fucking disaster-gay. Paranoid furry.
He kept hitting his head into the wall, still holding his pillow between his hands.
Fucking weak idiot.
He rested his head on the wall, not moving an inch. The only thing he heard, was his own breath. There was no texture on the walls to focus on.
He let out a sigh.
His head was a mess. Should he trust his head or his heart?
Should he just confess his feelings, or keep up an angry fasade and avoid being let down?
He wanted to run away. Run away so badly. He really wanted to get away, stop seeing Lance all around him. Maybe if he stayed away and tried to think of something else, the recurring images of the blue paladin would disappear?
But did he want that?
He wanted to see Lance every day. To feel the dark skin close to his own, breath in the smell of it. He'd sometimes smell like a rainforest, some days he would smell like cinnamon. Keith was sure that Lance had somehow gotten his hands on that spice, but he couldn't for the love of his life figure out how to ask him about it.
He wanted to keep his dear friend close, hugging him tight and fall asleep while watching him breathe. Stroking his fingers through the short hair, see to it how long it's grown since they began dating, since they left earth. Tracing his neck. Twisting the locks. Feeling the silky hair tickle his senses.
Keith sighed again. He was afraid of rejection, but it would be worth a shot if Lance would actually like him back.
Should he talk to Shiro about this? Tell another paladin how he felt about Lance, and his insecurities in that matter?
Keith fell onto the bed, clutching his pillow, hugging it tight.
Talking to Shiro about minor insecurities that probably will be solved once he leaves for The Blade?
.
[Author here! Please comment constructiv criticism on Keiths feelings/thoughts if you think it's a miss! I'm having trouble writing this thing from his perspective only (good thing I'll be switching to Lance next chapter^^]