To be resolved…
A/N: Hi everyone, Tameera here. This is just eragon's to-do list, as of book 3. I think you'll find that Christopher Paolini has left quite a few things to be resolved…
(Also, italics= thinking/thoughts. I'm writing this like they know you're reading it and they have an idea of what their future should turn out as.)
Eragon walked out of his small, cramped tent.
Stupid Varden, with their stupid living space…
Enter Saphira.
ERAGON.
"Gah, what? Jeez, don't do that!"
Sorry. She didn't sound very sorry at all.
"Well, what do you want so badly?"
To nag you about the future, of course.
"Oh frick. How's about I say it so we spare the poor readers your excessively annoying voice?"
Well, technically, seeing as I don't have an actual voice…
"Shut up."
I am.
"Can we please get on with this? It's taking forever."
And whose fault is that…?
"Okay, okay, here's the basic list. I have to…
-Battle 2 extremely powerful enemy riders and their considerably-bigger-than-Saphira sized dragons.
-Save Alagaesia (that one was kind of a 'no duh' sort of thing)
-Single-handedly help out the Varden in all their stupid little battles.
-Find out exactly what Tenga's mental problem is.
-Rescue the Eldunari
-Make sure Roran doesn't do anything too stupid.
-Tell Arya how much I love her and not get rejected again.
-Go to the desert with Saphira since CP has been ever-so-not-lightly hinting there's something important there.
-Avenge that dumb dwarf king who was idiotic enough to get himself killed and cause even more trouble in my already overflowing with trouble life.
-Visit Brom's tomb and beat the crap out of anyone who tries to steal from it.
-Find out what the Menoa tree wants.
-Fulfill Angela's prophesy and leave Alagaesia forever, even though that makes no sense whatsoever.
-Fund a whole new generation of dragon riders.
-Watch Elva just in case she tries to assassinate me. (Which is a likely scenario)
-Destroy all the overused plot bunnies on Fan fiction dot net. (By this, I mean all those hare-brained, senseless shippings, the overused Galbatorix-has-an-unhappy-beautiful-teenage-daughter-whom-the-last-egg-hatches-for, ANY oc shippings, and all of those so-filled-with-plot-holes-they-resemble-Swiss-cheese versions of the fourth book. The fourth egg hatches for Arya. Deal with it.)
-Bring Murtagh back to the 'Light Side'.
-Beat up everyone who says the inheritance cycle is just a really bad cross between the lord of the rings and Star Wars.
-Stop Glaedr from being all emo-depressed.
-Find homes for everyone from Carvahall, helpless hillbillies that they are.
-Get the green egg to hatch (Almost certainly for Arya. Contrary to several beliefs, it will not be an oc, Nasuada, Galbatorix's non-existent daughter, Angela, Elva, or Roran. I'm not even going to try to explain my reasoning because it would take too long, all the evidence is in the series, and you might be trolls who enjoy annoying the crap out of people who actually think these things over.)
-Learn more magic from the elves.
-Go to an Urgal village sometime.
-Get Angela to tell me just how old she is.
Wowzers, that's a nasty list.
"You're telling me."
Well, get started!
"I'm genuinely considering suicide, I'll have you know!
You're too much of a coward.
"... I loathe it when you're right."
A/N: If I get any flames for my views, I'll do something so unfathomably horrible you cannot even begin to imagine the consequences. Or I'll just laugh at how stupid and inarticulate you are. I like the latter best. :D