Chapter One -When I met you, When you met me
"No! No,no,no. You are doing it all wrong, Bonnie!" Caroline shouted as she walked as fast as possible towards her friends. She violently reached and wripped out the black clipboard from within her friend's hands. "You do not deserve this." She spoke and then turned on her heels.
Bonnie made an angry, surprised face while Elena and Matt tried to hide their laughs. "Oh, come on, Bonnie. You know what Caroline gets like when she's throwing a party."
"Yeah, well suddenly I wish we stopped throwing parties."
"Less talking, more working, guys!" Caroline sang out from across the room where she was arraging the flowers and taking care of the drinks.
Dean pulled up behind the block of a big building. They both watched people taking boxes in and out of a place called "Mystic Grill", they were carrying flowers, drinks, chairs, and all party supplies.
"You know Sammy, when you said 'a town full of supernatural creatures' that's not exactly what I had in mind." Dean mumbled as he gave his brother a knowing look.
"No, I'm telling you man, this place is it. This is like, I don't know, like the hunter's dream or something. Every second person has some unhuman side, I'm telling you." Sam said, looking as sure as ever.
"Okay, if you say so. Looks like they're having themselves a little gathering tonight, we might as well go."
"To drink? Dean, this is serious."
"No, dude. Not to drink, to investigate. Drunk people are more likely to spell all their dark secrets to us." He answered flashing a smile towards his brother.
Sam raised his eyebrows, "Yeah, sure, and the hot chicks we just saw go inside are just a bonus."
"I really don't think we're gonna find something here."
"I'll go talk to some people on the bar, stay put." Sam whispered and walked away. Dean frowned and went to sit down at one of the little, wooden tables that were arranged in front of the mini-stage.
"Hi everyone," a blonde girl went up on the stage and took the micro in her right hand, "I hope this isn't too bad." she laughed and the music slowly started playing in the backround as she closed her eyes for a brief moment, took a deep breath and then opened them in the same time the music flooded from between her pink lips. Dean recalled that the song she was singing was called 'Eternal Flame'.
Her voice was smooth, like velvet, it almost felt like a whisper and that was all he could hear, while all he could see were big, brigh, blue eyes. She was beautiful, though, not in the way those long legged, easy women that he would meet at the bar in a side motel late at night were, the ones that were yours after the first drink, the ones that were beautiful but empty, had no depth. No, she was beautiful in the way the sea kisses the shore, in the way glass shatters at 3 am from between the fingers of a sleepy, lonely person. She was beautiful in the way the sun makes it's way in between the trees. She was beautiful and while the song lasted Dean did nothing but look at her.
"Hey, found something?" a voice spoke while the chair besides him moved.
"Yeah," he whispered, watching her walk away,
"Oh yeah, what?"
"What? No, nothing. I found nothing."
Two days later
Caroline poured herself her 5th, maybe 6th drink. She didn't even remember why she was here anymore. Why had she come? She knew it was with a reason.. drink.. she had wanted to get drunk? But why? It idn't really matter anymore, did it? She was drunk and she felt like she could fly. She had always wanted to fly , it was her biggest dream. Birds could fly. They could fly away whenever things got too messy. She liked that. She fancied the idea of being able to go anywhere in the world, at any time.
"Whiskey, big." She hear a deep voice next to her. There was a guy she had never seen before. Brown hair, and eyes. Green, beautiful eyes.
"I'll have the same." Someone said. A girl. She was close. It took Caroline a few seconds to realize that the voice had been hers. One of the many aspect about alchohol.
"Not that it's my job, but haven't you had enough?" The stranger spoke, and in another 5 seconds, she realized he was indeed speaking to her.
"Oh no, I feel great, I could fly." She giggled.
"Well, let's not test that theory, what do you say?"
Caroline laughed and moved a bit closer to him. "Do you wanna know a secret?" She close enough to feel his breath, but too drunk to pull away from this stranger.
"Hit me." He whispered and he drank down the liquid in his glass.
"I'm really just laughing to cover the tears, I'm not actually happy." And then she laughed. She pulled a few 10$ bills from her pocket, left them on the bar with a thud, smiled at the guy and made her way out.
The cold air hit her and her curly hair went backwards. She heard the door close behind her and exhaled deeply. And then she heard the door open again. And then close again. And then footsteps. And normally, she would have probably turned around, but, well, she was drunk and a vampire, so safety wasn't an issue.
"You know, probably it isn't a very good idea to get drunk and then walk home alone, at night." The voice was nice, smooth and steady. She had heard it before. She made the effort to turn around.
"And walking home with you would be so much safer, huh?" She raised her eyebrows and smiled.
"I actually hadn't offered, but yeah, it would be." He walked closer to her. "Which way?"
Caroline smiled lightly and started walking forward.
They had been walking for a few minutes when he finally spoke.
"So, why are you unhappy?" He coughed silently, as if not sure whether he should have spoken or not.
She raised her eyebrows again. "Why should I be telling you? I don't even know you."
"And that's why you should be telling me." He answere and her eyes lit up with a smile.
They her chest sank and she spoke softly, "First of all, we're all unhappy, there's just people who are either ignorant or just stupid enough not to realize that. Second, why not? I mean, what's really so great out there? What's the bigger picture? Because, I sure can't seem to see it. All that's happening around is death, and misery, pain, sorrow, bad things to good people, and you can never stop it, you know? And then comes the personal stuff, the selfish part; does anybody love me? Am I good enough? Is everything my fault? Could I have done better? Been better? Or am I just a monster? Do I deserve to be alive? Am I better off dead? And the sad part is that these questions never end, but the sadder part is, that they never get answered either. So basically, I am a confused, drunk, lonely, control freak, with no sense of happiness, and no purpose in life, just living it, day by day, hoping to find my answers." She said everything with one breath and then silently, her words faded away.
With teary eyes, she looked back to the guy. The guy she didn't know, the guy that she had just confessed more to than any of her friends in the past months. "There's just a lot of crap and I'm not sure I can deal with it, or that I even should, sometimes it just seems pointless. Have you ever felt like there's not a single person in the world who loves you?" Through the last part her voice broke and a few lonely tears rolled down her white cheaks. She hadn't even realized they were standing in front of her house, so she stopped walking and just looked up to him. "I'm sorry, I should just go, I'm sorry."
"I'm Dean." Was the first thing the guy said and she lauhed through her tears.
"Caroline." And then they just stared at each other for a few minutes until he broke the silence.
"I get it, okay? Everything you just said, you have no idea how much I get it. I feel it every second of the day, I get it and I get where you're coming from and I really wish I could tell you what the bigger picture was, or reveal some huge secret about why all of this shit is worth it, but I can't. God knows I've tried, but I sure as hell don't know."
Caroline stared at him for a few minutes and smiled awkwardly. "Do you wanna come inside, Dean?"
He nodded and they both walked silently upstairs, up to her bedroom and then she just laid on the bed. Dean laughed and pulled the covers up to her shoulders. "Goodnight, Caroline." He turned around, and just as he was about to close the door he heard something, the sound of something small and shivering. He heard her soft sobs through the darkness.
"Can you, like, stay? Just for a little while, please?" She whispered and mid sentence her voice was shaking so she barely pronounced the last few words.
"Ah, what the hell, sure." Then she felt her bed shift with the new weight on it. She silently took his hand and wrapped it around her stomach, laying to the side and then closed her eyes.
"Let's just lie for a minute, okay? Just a minute, I promise. Then you can go. I just- I just can't fall asleep alone, not now, not-" she felt herself drifting to sleep as the last thing she heard was Dean's steady breathing in her back.
Caroline woke up to a heavy chest and an empty bed. She shifted around, the sun shining through her curtains, she strecthed and her gaze move from every corner of the room but nothing. She was all alone.
Her day had went as usual. She had went to school, then the grill, then back home. She hadn't told anyone of what had happened, for some reason she felt like this was her memory, it was her night of letting herself be weak and she didn't feel like sharing it with anyone else. For all they knew, she was happy, careless, free and young. Yet, she felt like none of these things. There was always a shadow of unhappiness, she was always stressed about something, even if it wasn't her own problem to stress over, she felt trapped and she couldn't feel more tired.
xxx
It had been a few days since her drunk night and she was currently laying in her bed, listening to music, reading a book.
She heard someone knock on the door downstairs. Caroline opened the door with one hand as she held her book with other. The surprise on her face could not have been missed.
" 'You Get So Alone At Times That It Just Makes Sense', huh? Sullen." She blinked a few times to makes sure she wasn't mistaken.
"Dean? What are you doing here?" She tugged a strand of hair behind her ear and her lips formed a thin line.
"I just came to apologize for leaving like this, and, well, to check on see how you're doing." He looked honest and a small smile formed on his lips. "Wanna take a walk?"
She nodded and then closed the door behind her.
They both went to sit on a bench and Caroline stared at the ground in her feet.
"I just wanna get out, y`a know? Outta here. I've never really spoken about it with anyone, cuz it's never been part of the plan, but I do. Sometimes it scares me how willing I am to just pack a bag and leave, get on the next plane and never call back, how willing I am to leave everything and everyone."
Dean thought about it for a second. "Yeah, I understand, well, except the plane thing, thse things are creepy."
Caroline giggled and then he kep speaking. "Sometimes I just wonder what would happen if I decided to live the life I wanted to. If I just settled down."
"Settled down," Caroline reapeated. "And here I am talking about how much I wanna be on the road. Wanna switch lives?"
Dean chuckled, how naive she was.
"I never asked you, what are you doing here?"
"Work thing. It should be over soon though, I'm just here with my brother."
Caroline nodded and gazed off into the distance.
Both suddenly, yet slowly it starte raining and Caroline let a quick yelp escape her mouth as her hair started dripping wet. They both got up as the storm became stronger to the point where you couldn't see anything but the water falling from the grey clouds. They started running to her house and once she got inside he let go of her hand, which she hadn't even noticed he was holding.
"I should go, take care." He took a step back, but she took two steps forward and quickly wrapped her hands around his shoulders. In a few moments she pulled away and half smiled.
She walked back inside and closed the door, as he was walking away in the alley, with a sad smile.
As cliche as it was, it has been easier for her to speak to this stranger than anyone else in her life, and somehow she knew he really did understand what she was talking about, somehow she was sure he knew pain.
Somehow, for their two conversations, she had shared most of her feelings while all he had done was agree, but never say anything on his behalf. Sadly, she would never see him again.