The night was cold, and a crisp wind whistled quietly through the narrow valley Roy and his retainer found themselves travelling through. Their final leg of the journey would be silent, save for the rhythmic clopping of hooves produced by their steeds and the booming explosions shaking the air above them.
The high rising hills lost their verticality in increments, descending exponentially until they met the valley floor in a wide field a few miles out. This field was lit by flaming debris that had crashed there from the sky, illuminating a strange loop of roadway and, of course, the magnificent castle of Princess Peach the travellers were headed for.
"Guess they didn't need our help after all." Lance, Roy's retainer, remarked as the final turtle-faced airship sank out of the sky. The foreign vehicle exploded in a tremendous fireball on impact with the ground, cementing the swordsmen's suspicion that a frigate has no business being in the sky as they watched a thick pillar of smoke rise from the wreckage.
"It won't be the first time we've made allies on goodwill alone." Roy shrugged, making reference to the game of war and politics he had waged as a teenager, Lance by his side, to save the land and become regent of Lycia.
Lance allowed the journey to become silent again, as his red-haired Lord had already voiced his weariness of playing I-Spy from horseback earlier in the day. In the silence he heard rustling in the foliage nearby.
Lance drew his sword, and Roy let the legendary Binding Blade from its scabbard.
"What do you hear?" Roy asked. Suddenly his question was answered as a blue, bipedal dinosaur creature lept from the bushes. Nine more of different colors sprung from the underbrush all around until the two men were surrounded. The blue one appeared to be their leader, and sported a pair of sunglasses and a spiked choker- neither of which Roy and Lance recognized.
It spoke up in a language they did not understand. When Roy let it know as much, the creature snarled. It opened its mouth, shooting out a prehensile tongue that latched on to the gift basket under Roy's arm and snapped back into its resting position with gifts in tow. The creature consumed the basket in a single gulp and its cheeks welled up. The pressure was released in the form of a sizable fireball sent hurtling towards the two men. Roy struck the fireball with his blade, scattering fire across the field and illuminating the battle as the rest of the yoshis sprung into action.
Roy barked a command at Lance- to cover his back- and they set to work defending against the attack. They and their steeds had received the best of training and experience, so the local wildlife didn't stand much of a chance. Within minutes all of the opposition lie dead on the ground as the fires burned out. A moment of silent passed and then, with the sound of an explosion, the sky lit up once again.
Roy marvelled as blasts of colorful fire streaked across the sky above him, creating fantastic shapes he regarded as symbols of Mushroom Kingdom culture. Everything seemed to bear a set of little eyes, perhaps as a sign of vigilance, like the votive statues of his land's ancient past?
"Hello!" a high-pitched voice snapped Roy out of his pondering and he looked down to see two little men in white cloaks, wielding spears and bearing poofy, red polka dot hats.
"..Oh- Well met. I am Roy of Pherae, husband to Queen Lilina of the Kingdom of Lycia. I seek audience with the Princess, and medical attention for my friend here." Technically a king and no doubt a leader, Roy knew how to go into business mode when he had to.
The guards whispered to each other for a minute before crying a "Let em in!" to the gatehouse. The drawbridge descended, and the little guards gestured their royal guest inside. Roy lead the horses into the courtyard and dismounted, turning to the authorities.
"I don't mean to assume, but do your people not use stables?" He questioned, seeing no appropriate place to retire the mounts for the night.
"Use what now?"
"I think he's lookin' for a place to put the four-legged creatures."
"Oh. I mean we got plenty of guest bedrooms." One of the guards piped up towards Roy after hashing it out with his partner. Being as much a politician as he was a fighter Roy would not usually laugh at this kind of confusion, but the high-pitched fellow's suggestion of horses laying down under the sheets of a bedset overpowered his more polite sensibilities and he let out a chuckle.
"This courtyard will be fine, if you're okay with that." Roy recovered. The little guards seemed more amused than offended, and a few of them grouped up to carry Lance away.
Roy made his way to the grand, wooden doors of Peach's Castle and, giving a firm nod to no one in particular to assure himself of his confidence, he pushed them open with authority.
The grand hall wasn't exactly what Roy had expected, certainly less opulent than the royalty of Ostia would have ever settled for. A dainty landscape mural covered the walls, and little more than a red carpet ran down the hall to the monarch's throne. Oh, and the princess wasn't there.
Roy walked up to the pearly, vacant throne and looked to the small man standing near it. He was clearly much older than the guards had been, with a white moustache and classy monocle that seemed present just to stress how old this guy was.
"Hello old chap, my name is Toadsworth. What do you need?" The old guy stated, tapping his little cane on the tile floor.
"I represent the royalty of a neighboring land, the Kingdom of Lycia. I was hoping to have audience with Princess Peach."
"Er-hmm.. As personal assistant and advisor to the princess, I can handle any queries you may have." Toadsworth smiled to the red-haired king encouragingly. The smile fell right off Toadsworth's kind of droopy face as a shout and series of giggles burst out of the nearby staircase.
Princess Peach bust into the room with a smile on her face and an open champagne bottle in hand. She was barefoot, having lost her heels before stumbling down the stairs, and one of the poofy shoulders of her pink dress had slipped off.
"Here to party?" Peach asked in a shout, catching herself on the silver throne. Toadsworth recoiled in terror. Mario came down the stairs with a slice of cake.
"I uh." Roy found himself physically unable to complete his sentence. He took a moment to come up with something for his second try. "Yes?"
"Hell yeah." Peach fistpumped with one hand, tossing the champagne to him with the other. She then devoted both hands to giving the ceiling a couple of birds. "Fuck you, Bowser!"
Roy looked to Mario, and the portly plumber looked back expectantly. So he drank.
Peach took Mario by the hand, leading the boys into the hallway. They went past her galley rooms, past the infinite staircase, and into a backroom that did a number on Roy's relatively simple medieval fantasy senses.
Neon lights flashed from the ceiling, confetti and streamers were everywhere, and loud, impossible music played from somewhere in the crowd.
Several games foreign to Roy had been assembled in this party room, and Peach traipsed over to one that involved cards at a table. Mario picked up a cup from the table and partook in the festivities with his princess, while Roy stood still, trying to make sense of what he was experiencing.
A small mushroom hat guy stood at an appropriately small table at the back of the room, apparently manipulating the music with the discs on the table. A banner hung above him that read "So Long, Gay Bowser! Celebrating 100 victories over King Koopa."
Most of the party participants were the short, mushroom hat baby fellows Roy had grown used to seeing around. But Peach and Mario were proof the Mushroom Kingdom had residents with dimensions more familiar to him, and looking around he spotted a few more like-sized people.
Particularly, he saw a young adult in a red jacket playing a game at a long table. He took turns with another player hitting the balls on the table into holes in the sides and corners with a stick. Roy gathered that this guy was pretty good at the game- he knocked a lot more balls in than his opponents, and when about two thirds of the balls had been scored (or when all the solid or striped colored balls had been scored, as Roy later noticed) he cajoled a handful of coins from his opponent and reset the board.
"Roy, hold my seat!" Peach shouted as she bolted out of her chair. He quietly stepped over and took a seat at the card table next to Mario, as per the princess's request. Roy observed the game in silence, attempting to put a rough understanding of another Mushroom Kingdom game under his belt that night.
It seemed like whoever lost the round was forced to drink a cup of liquid, some kind of potent alcohol judging by the smell. The turn order came around to where the princess had been sitting earlier, and the toads looked to Roy expectantly.
"Oh, I'm not playing. I'm here on business." Roy explained. Mario didn't seem convinced.
"You-a sit at the table, you-a play." The kingdom's hero declared. Roy looked back at the princess, busy hugging on the red-jacketed master of the ball and stick game, and then back to the table.
"Alright, fair enough." Roy picked up the princess's cards, and immediately found himself with a losing hand.
A couple hours passed, Mario went to bed, and Roy found himself sitting on the castle roof with Princess Peach. The open air was a welcome reprieve from the claustrophobic party room, and the cold wind was refreshing on their sweaty skin. Roy caught himself falling into a sort of trance as his sleepy eyes fixed on the smoldering flames of Bowser's airships.
"So Roy, you're the King of Lycia?" Peach asked. She was surprisingly coherent, given how much she had drank that night.
"Yes, my lady. We heard our neighbors were being invaded so we, y'know we set out to help you out. I guess you didn't need it."
"Oh, not with Bowser. He kind of sucks, alright? Nobody here is scared of him anymore." Peach said with a smile, and Roy had a good laugh at that. Her smile and just general demeanor was contagious, also he was pretty drunk. "... I would still be interested in your people's help, though. With our worlds coming together like this, my Kingdom is sure to face greater threats than the likes of Bowser in the future."
"Hahaha, alright then! Let's make this union official- Kingdom of Lycia and Kingdom of Mushroom, friends for life."
"Yeah." Peach smiled.