Names and Memories

A rare insight of what could have been, what Brax could have had.

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So after Friday night's Home & Away... I think we need a little something.

I have no idea where this came from, I've only done one OneShot before but I needed it and maybe you do too :)

It started off only being 800 words and it just kept building and building.

I would really appreciate you reviewing :)

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As soon as he got out of his ute, Brax heard the commotion inside his house.

He paused and listened trying to figure out what was going on; the talking was loud and laughing could be heard even from the driveway.

Brax made his way to the front door and he could hear the tell tale voices of his two brothers plus Bianca and Ruby.

"We having a party?" Brax called into the living room as he walked through the front door.

He was met with a chorus of greetings and his eyes also found Irene, April and Dex.

"Yeah, we're celebrating, look who's out of the big house," Heath said proudly gesturing to the small bundle in Casey's arms.

Brax couldn't help the grin that spread onto his face seeing his nephew free from confines of the hospital humidicrib. As if knowing he was being spoken about, baby Rocco began to stir.

"Hey mate," Brax greeted Rocco as he leant over Casey's shoulder.

"So you finally settled on a name?" Ruby asked Bianca.

"Yes," Bianca answered happily. "Rocco Scott," she began.

"Braxton," Heath finished.

"You got your way," Brax joked with Bianca.

Heath had told Brax that he didn't want Rocco to be a Braxton and that Bianca didn't take the news too well.

"I did indeed; I like the flow of Scott Braxton."

"Good name!" Brax said, "I'm going to have a shower, be back in a tic."

"You don't want to hold him?" Heath asked, recognising instantly that there was something off with Brax.

"As soon as I clean up a bit," Brax answered.

"What's your problem?" Heath demanded but he received no answer.

Heath followed Brax into the bedroom and watched as he grabbed a towel and fresh clothes.

"What's the matter with you?" Heath demanded again.

"Nothing," Brax answered, and he pushed past Heath into the bathroom.

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"You over it now?" Heath demanded when Brax reappeared.

"Over what?"

"Whatever has got you into a mood?"

"I can tell you right now, I'm not the one in a mood."

Brax and Heath began to bicker and ignored the silence that had taken over the small group watching them.

"Nah, come on, tell me."

"There's nothing to tell, can I hold my nephew?" Brax turned his attention to Bianca who rocked Rocco gently in her arms.

"Of course," she smiled passing her tiny baby to the eldest Braxton whose arms made Rocco look considerable smaller.

"What are you mad about?"

"Nah, I said I'm not mad Heath and I meant it," Brax continued, he sat down on the edge of the arm chair next to Irene.

"Heath," Bianca pleaded.

"No, I want to know, I saw the funny look you got when you heard his full name. What? You thought it was stupid me not wanting him to have my name. That's it, isn't it?" Heath continued getting angrier each time he spoke.

"No I don't actually."

"Then what is it?"

Brax paused for a moment and he took a deep breath as he looked down at his brother's young son. "I have nothing to be mad about, I said the exact same thing once," Brax told his younger brother shutting him up completely.

The rest of the room went silent but Brax and Heath were locked in a stare down.

"What?" Heath asked softly, his anger had disappeared completely.

"You heard me," Brax said, there was an edge to his voice and Brax's focus returned to his tiny nephew in his hands.

"I didn't think you were with Tegan when she had Darcy?"

"I wasn't," Brax admitted and he didn't dare look at his brother again. He knew he'd figure it out eventually.

A small gasp from Bianca broke the silence, she knew what he meant, who he was talking about.

So did Ruby.

"Charlie?" She whispered.

Brax nodded, part of him hated that he let something so private, so personal slip. The other part, felt relieved; relieved at least that he was able to share his own fears of the Braxton name with his brother.

It was times like this that Brax realised how alike he and Heath were.

"Buckton?" Heath began. "Was she...?" He let the sentence linger.

Heath had never been close to Charlie Buckton, hadn't even liked her. He doubted that if she were still alive that his feelings toward her would have changed but, the thought of his brother's girlfriend being pregnant when she died, pregnant with his possible niece or nephew, upset him more than he was able to verbalise.

"Nah, nah, nah," Brax started, making eye contact for the first time since his admission. "It just came up in conversation sometimes."

Again the conversation stilled.

"You didn't want your kids to be Braxton's?" Bianca asked.

"Not even a little bit."

"Why?" Casey asked, the thought of denying his children the chance to share his last name had never occurred to him.

"Why, Heath?" Brax deflected the question.

"You're different Case, you haven't had to put up with the shit we have, the stares the judgement, all because of our last name."

"I get judged on my name," Casey told them.

"No you don't," Brax interrupted. "You get judged on us, it's different."

"What, what did Charlie think about that?" Bianca continued, the curiosity getting better of her.

A ghost of a smile flickered across Brax's face as his mind took him back to the first time he and Charlie spoke about the possibility of having children, a private memory that he would never share.

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"Do you want kids?" Charlie asked hesitantly as she pulled her shirt back over her head.

"That depends," Brax answered honestly.

"On?" Charlie asked.

"On whether you want kids."

"And if I did..."

"Then I might too, "Brax answered and his heart almost burst when he saw the large grin spread across his lovers face.

"And if I don't..." Charlie continued and Brax saw the fear in her eyes.

"Then it'll be just us."

"But what do you want?" Charlie asked.

"You!"Brax answered before pulling her back into his bed the shirt she had just put on discarded quickly.

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Brax shook his head in an effort of clearing it.

"We uh, might head off love," Irene's voice broke in to the conversation before Brax had the chance to answer, she spoke to Bianca but gave Brax's knee a gentle pat as she stood up.

"I thought we were staying for dinner?" Dex asked but a strong glare from Irene shut him up.

Irene, Dex and April quickly departed, the conversation got too personal and Irene knew enough of Darryl Braxton to know that he was a private person.

Irene also though that this was probably the first time he had brought up his relationship with Charlie voluntarily, and Brax deserved to be able to do that within the safe confines of his family.

"What, what did Charlie think?" Bianca tried again once the others had left.

"She was surprised I guess."

"I didn't know that she wanted more kids," Ruby announced through a whisper.

"She said she wouldn't mind a boy," Brax told her. "Then she'd have one of each," Brax looked at Ruby and Heath took a deep breath from behind Bianca.

"So she wanted one?"

"Not exactly," Brax answered and again his mind took him back to another time and place.

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They'd spent the afternoon at a private beach a little way up the coast.

On their way back, almost at Summer Bay they stopped at a crossing where a young family were waiting to cross.

Charlie leant forward eagerly in her seat and watched the young mother lead her son across the crossing. The young boy who Charlie guessed to be about 1 toddled after her, his tiny hands held onto his father's fingers, as they moved step by step until they were on the other side.

Charlie's eyes followed them as they continued up the road, the little boy stumbled slightly, having tripped over his small feet and Charlie watched the father catch his son's tiny hands before he fell and lift him into the air and onto his shoulders.

"I want a little boy," Charlie whispered.

Brax, who had begun to drive, slowed the car.

"Hold on, I'll pull over and ask them how much."

Charlie laughed and Brax was left with no choice but to join her.

"I would love a son," Charlie continued, the grin still hadn't left her face.

"Would you?"

"Yep, I would then have one of each," she answered and Brax watched as she bit her lip in an effort to stop her smile becoming wider.

"You could teach him to surf, but he could be a mummy's boy too."

"Really? You think a son of mine is going to be a mummy's boy?" Brax teased.

"If your son was my son then he would be," Charlie teased right back.

She stopped suddenly.

"You don't have a daughter," Charlie stated seriously.

"Not that I know of, but we might have a problem if I do."

"We should have a daughter too," Charlie told him ignoring his tease.

"Should we?" Brax asked, he reached over with his left hand and held Charlie's. Charlie wasn't looking at him, she had a faraway look in her eye and Brax imagined the scene she was picturing in her head, a son and daughter just for them.

He'd never had these types of conversations with a girl before, he wasn't that type of guy. It surprised him how easy it was to talk about but he knew that was because of who he was talking to.

"I think so. I think you'd love to have a daddy's girl."

"Yeah, that would be cool until I kill her boyfriend and wind up in jail, great plan, Charlie," Brax nodded, putting an end to the conversation but not the twinkle in Charlie's eyes.

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"How many did you want?" Ruby asked.

Brax shrugged his shoulders.

"Please," Ruby whispered again, "how many brothers and sisters could I have had?"

"I dunno, Rubes," Brax answered but he didn't meet her eyes.

"Yes, you do."

Brax exhaled, "No I don't Rubes, I would have given her as many as she wanted. Could have been two or more I reckon."

Ruby nodded with a smile and wiped her eyes with a tissue.

"So what happened?" Casey asked.

"Is that not the dumbest questions of the night," Heath barked, Bianca rolled her eyes beside him.

"What happened with the name thing?"

"Well, Charlie could be pretty convincing when she wanted to be," Brax replied with a smirk.

"What did she do?" Bianca asked.

Brax's eyes glanced at Ruby.

"Can't exactly tell you with her daughter present can I," he stated.

"No, tell me please," Ruby begged, it had been so long she felt like she belonged somewhere and the fact that they were talking about Charlie only made her feel that much happier.

"Well, she told me that if my kids weren't going to have my last name then we weren't going to have kids and if we weren't going to have kids then maybe there was no point in trying."

"Trying what?" Casey asked innocently.

Brax widened his eyes at his youngest brother.

"You're kidding? Buckton threatened to withhold sex? That's gold," Heath laughed before turning to Casey, "and you're supposed to be the smart one."

"I didn't know," Ruby stated.

"Know what?" Heath asked.

"I didn't know, I never even asked those types of questions," Ruby's eyes filled with tears.

"Ruby," Bianca began, ready to console the young woman.

"No," Ruby cut her off. "I was so mad for so long, she was hell bent on me and Casey staying away from each other and then I find out she was secretly with you. I never gave her a chance."

"You weren't the only one," Heath added.

Baby Rocco let out a small cry and Brax moved him slightly in his arms and the crying stopped.

"Did you ever get to the bottom of it, what you're children were going to be called."

Brax took a moment, it would easy for him to keep the ending to this argument to himself but he saw how much Ruby appreciated hearing about her mum and for a strange reason, Brax thought Heath appreciated knowing that he wasn't the only Braxton who had reservations about their last name.

"Yeah, yeah we did."

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"I don't even know why we're arguing Charlie, you suddenly have this idea that you want to be a Mrs and you're upping me because I said I want our kids to have your last name," Brax yelled.

"I don't want to be a Mrs I want to be your Mrs," Charlie yelled and with those words the argument ended and Brax stilled.

"I don't mean right now and I don't know when but I want to have your last name so that means your kids, my kids; our kids are going to have your last name too."

"You want to be a Braxton?" Brax asked.

"I want to be your Braxton, is that so bad?" Charlie asked.

"No, not bad at all, I just..." Brax let the sentence linger.

"Didn't think I would want that?"

"Not with me."

"But I do, I do want that with you."

"That sounds pretty damn good to me," Brax answered pulling her into his arms.

"Yeah, that's what I think too."

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By the time Brax finished telling Ruby and the others how their argument ended, Ruby had tears in her eyes.

Heath was lost for words, he finally saw for the first time how genuine his brother's feelings were for his lost love.

"It's... umm... It's nice to hear you talking about her." Bianca sniffed and Brax realised her eyes, like Ruby's were red rimmed.

"I miss her so much," Ruby told them, the three Braxton boys had almost been her family and as sad as it was, they were the closest thing to family she had left.

"Me too, Rubes," Brax answered, "Me too."

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This wasn't meant to be as long as it was, once I started, I couldn't stop.

Please review, who knows, it might encourage more OneShots :)

Thank-you for reading.

xoxox