A.N. This is a songfic to Frankie Valli's song "Opus 17(Don't worry bout me)" I love that song, it's an oldie, but a goodie. (Hee-hee!) It's pretty much about Ron realizing he needs to set someone free.....
Ron was sitting up in his bed. The blanket was pulled up to his waist, and his arms were folded. He was propped up on a pillow and his head was facing the small form beside him. The soft snoring of his lover was comforting. He smiled as the boy stretched in his sleep beside him.
"Dra......no, don't.......," he mumbled in his sleep. Ron just looked at him. He was still having the dream. Ron knew that Harry was occasionally plagued with dreams of the night Voldemort had been killed, the night Draco had saved Harry, all the way back in their sixth year.
Harry stirred again and opened one of his eyes a little. Ron smiled at him. Harry smiled too and reached up for one of Ron's hands. He took Ron's hand to his mouth and kissed the palm.
"Harry, we have to talk," he said quietly. Harry's deep green eyes locked with his, and he was temted to just say "I love you" instead of saying what he knew what had to be said.
"Harry, you have to go to him. I can tell, you still love him. I don't wanna stand in your way," Ron said.
Oh I can see there ain't no room for me
you're only holding out your heart in sympathy
if there's another man, then boy I understand
go on and take his hand and don't you worry bout me
"Ron, I love you," Harry started. Ron stopped him by putting his fingers to Harry's lips, then replaced them with his mouth. He kissed Harry softly and then pulled away to look into his eyes.
"Harry, when I kiss you, do you feel passion inside? I can tell you don't, I can see it in your eyes. You may love me Harry, but not like I love you, or you love Draco," he said. Harry's eyes lowered and shone brilliantly with tears.
"You know it, and I know it," Ron whispered. "It's killing me to give you up, when you're so much to me, but your happiness is most important."
I'll be blue and I'll be crying too
but boy you know I only want what's best for you
what good is over-pride if our true love has died
go on and be his love and don't you worry bout me
"Ron," he said and finally looked back up into his eyes while tears trickled down his cheeks.
"I'll always remember what we had, what we shared. Harry, if you want me to, I can leave, go away. You don't have to feel guilty," Ron told him.
"No, don't leave. You're-you're one of my best friends, Ron. I don't know what I'd do if I couldn't see you again," Harry said, pulling Ron to him and holding him there. Ron was tortued trying to be a friend and loving Harry at the same time. It could never be like it was before Draco, or after.
Ron remembered back to when, before graduation, Hermione had accidently told Harry of Ron's feelings. And Harry had thought back to when he and Ron had been inseperable, and Draco had been just a rotten Slytherin. Ron and Harry slept together for the first time that night. After Draco and Harry broke up the next day, they graduated and Harry moved into the Burrow. They lived their for a couple of weeks before they moved into their own apartment. It had been a year and Ron's continuing guilt at being the reason for their breakup tore away at him when he heard Harry at night, talking about Draco. Whatever Harry felt for Ron, friendship or maybe even a bit of romantic love, it wasn't what he had for Draco, and Ron knew it. And now he was trying to set it right.
"Ron you've been my best mate for years, and you're so loyal, and you love me so much, and I-" Harry was babbling on and on about why they should be together. Ron silenced him with a quick kiss.
"Listen, you need Draco. And he needs you too. I know because he came into the shop a week ago. He looked so sad, and I asked him if he still loves you, and he said yes, Harry, he said yes," Ron revealed. Harry was now silently sobbing. Ron didn't think he was going to have to tell when Draco had come into Quality Quidditch supplies, Harry had loaned Ron the money to buy it. Draco's tired rumpled look stayed in Ron's eyes. He remembered what Draco had asked.
"How's Harry?" and Ron remembered his reply.
"Do you still love him?" Draco looked surprised Ron had asked, but answered anyway.
"Everyday." Draco had left.
I'll be strong i'll try to carry on
although you know it won't be easy when you're gone
I'll always think of you, the tender love we knew
but somehow I'll get through so don't you worry bout me
Ron and Harry were both dressed and Harry was putting his clothes and belongings in his small trunk, where everything in the world could fit because it magically shrunk anything you put in it. When Harry was done, he turned to look at Ron. Ron was trying to be happy, he was giving Harry the greatest gift he could. He would let Harry be with who truly made him happy.
"I guess I should leave now," Harry said. Ron nodded slowly, and embraced him. He thought of all the happy nights, all the wonderful picnics, the whispered words, the vacations, the shopping, the dates, visiting friends, the beautiful lovemaking, and he cried for the love that would never be his again, the love that was never meant to be his.
"Don't cry, don't. It'll be okay. It'll get better, and you'll meet someone you love, even more than me," Harry said, cradling him in his arms. Ron didn't know how to tell him he would never love someone like he loved Harry.
"Harry, if he ever hurts you, if he ever leaves you, you can always come to me again, even if it's only for a place to stay. I'll always be here for you. Always," Ron said.
"I couldn't ask you to do that, you need to move on," Harry said, while still feeling grateful for the offer.
"I'll always love you, no matter what. No one can change that. No one. And I'll never feel like this for anyone else. I'll spend my whole life waiting in case you need me. Cause there's nothing else to do," Ron said. Harry gave a little sigh.
"Ron, I want you to be happy."
"The only way I can be happy is if you're happy. please go, nd be with draco. Please. But remember, of you need me, for any reason, just tell me," Ron said.
"I'll owl you later," Harry said. Ron nodded and they pulled away. Harry snapped his trunk closed, looked at Ron and smiled a little. Ron smiled back.
I love you, Harry mouthed to Ron.
I love you too, Ron mouthed back. In an instant, Harry dissapeared.
sweetie pie before you say goodbye
remember if he ever leaves you high and dry
don't cry alone in pain, don't ever feel ashamed
if you want me again just don't you worry bout me
I love you no matter what you do
I'll spend my whole life waiting if you want me to
and if he says good-bye you know I'd rather die
than let you see me cry cause then you'd worry bout me
Ron's heart in his chest instantly felt like a vauous black hole, and all of him was sucked through a hole to leave him ragged. He contracted with the emotional pain that had actually turned physical and fell on the bed. He pulled his knees up to his chest and brought Harry's pillow to his face. He smelled the subtle scent of Harry's apple shampoo.
He's probably kissing Draco right now, he thought. Memories, tears, thoughts and daydreams about holding Harry in his arms again kept him busy for hours. He spent the whole day in his bed, not caring about eating or checking on the shop. He eventually drifted off to sleep with one thought on his mind, please be happy, Harry, please be happy.
I'll be strong I'll try to carry on
although you know it won't be easy when you're gone
I'll always think of you, the tender love we knew
but somehow I'll get through so don't you worry bout me
I'll be blue and I'll be crying too
but boy you know I only want what's best for you
what good is over-pride if our true love has died
go on and be his love and don't you worry bout me
Ron was sitting up in his bed. The blanket was pulled up to his waist, and his arms were folded. He was propped up on a pillow and his head was facing the small form beside him. The soft snoring of his lover was comforting. He smiled as the boy stretched in his sleep beside him.
"Dra......no, don't.......," he mumbled in his sleep. Ron just looked at him. He was still having the dream. Ron knew that Harry was occasionally plagued with dreams of the night Voldemort had been killed, the night Draco had saved Harry, all the way back in their sixth year.
Harry stirred again and opened one of his eyes a little. Ron smiled at him. Harry smiled too and reached up for one of Ron's hands. He took Ron's hand to his mouth and kissed the palm.
"Harry, we have to talk," he said quietly. Harry's deep green eyes locked with his, and he was temted to just say "I love you" instead of saying what he knew what had to be said.
"Harry, you have to go to him. I can tell, you still love him. I don't wanna stand in your way," Ron said.
Oh I can see there ain't no room for me
you're only holding out your heart in sympathy
if there's another man, then boy I understand
go on and take his hand and don't you worry bout me
"Ron, I love you," Harry started. Ron stopped him by putting his fingers to Harry's lips, then replaced them with his mouth. He kissed Harry softly and then pulled away to look into his eyes.
"Harry, when I kiss you, do you feel passion inside? I can tell you don't, I can see it in your eyes. You may love me Harry, but not like I love you, or you love Draco," he said. Harry's eyes lowered and shone brilliantly with tears.
"You know it, and I know it," Ron whispered. "It's killing me to give you up, when you're so much to me, but your happiness is most important."
I'll be blue and I'll be crying too
but boy you know I only want what's best for you
what good is over-pride if our true love has died
go on and be his love and don't you worry bout me
"Ron," he said and finally looked back up into his eyes while tears trickled down his cheeks.
"I'll always remember what we had, what we shared. Harry, if you want me to, I can leave, go away. You don't have to feel guilty," Ron told him.
"No, don't leave. You're-you're one of my best friends, Ron. I don't know what I'd do if I couldn't see you again," Harry said, pulling Ron to him and holding him there. Ron was tortued trying to be a friend and loving Harry at the same time. It could never be like it was before Draco, or after.
Ron remembered back to when, before graduation, Hermione had accidently told Harry of Ron's feelings. And Harry had thought back to when he and Ron had been inseperable, and Draco had been just a rotten Slytherin. Ron and Harry slept together for the first time that night. After Draco and Harry broke up the next day, they graduated and Harry moved into the Burrow. They lived their for a couple of weeks before they moved into their own apartment. It had been a year and Ron's continuing guilt at being the reason for their breakup tore away at him when he heard Harry at night, talking about Draco. Whatever Harry felt for Ron, friendship or maybe even a bit of romantic love, it wasn't what he had for Draco, and Ron knew it. And now he was trying to set it right.
"Ron you've been my best mate for years, and you're so loyal, and you love me so much, and I-" Harry was babbling on and on about why they should be together. Ron silenced him with a quick kiss.
"Listen, you need Draco. And he needs you too. I know because he came into the shop a week ago. He looked so sad, and I asked him if he still loves you, and he said yes, Harry, he said yes," Ron revealed. Harry was now silently sobbing. Ron didn't think he was going to have to tell when Draco had come into Quality Quidditch supplies, Harry had loaned Ron the money to buy it. Draco's tired rumpled look stayed in Ron's eyes. He remembered what Draco had asked.
"How's Harry?" and Ron remembered his reply.
"Do you still love him?" Draco looked surprised Ron had asked, but answered anyway.
"Everyday." Draco had left.
I'll be strong i'll try to carry on
although you know it won't be easy when you're gone
I'll always think of you, the tender love we knew
but somehow I'll get through so don't you worry bout me
Ron and Harry were both dressed and Harry was putting his clothes and belongings in his small trunk, where everything in the world could fit because it magically shrunk anything you put in it. When Harry was done, he turned to look at Ron. Ron was trying to be happy, he was giving Harry the greatest gift he could. He would let Harry be with who truly made him happy.
"I guess I should leave now," Harry said. Ron nodded slowly, and embraced him. He thought of all the happy nights, all the wonderful picnics, the whispered words, the vacations, the shopping, the dates, visiting friends, the beautiful lovemaking, and he cried for the love that would never be his again, the love that was never meant to be his.
"Don't cry, don't. It'll be okay. It'll get better, and you'll meet someone you love, even more than me," Harry said, cradling him in his arms. Ron didn't know how to tell him he would never love someone like he loved Harry.
"Harry, if he ever hurts you, if he ever leaves you, you can always come to me again, even if it's only for a place to stay. I'll always be here for you. Always," Ron said.
"I couldn't ask you to do that, you need to move on," Harry said, while still feeling grateful for the offer.
"I'll always love you, no matter what. No one can change that. No one. And I'll never feel like this for anyone else. I'll spend my whole life waiting in case you need me. Cause there's nothing else to do," Ron said. Harry gave a little sigh.
"Ron, I want you to be happy."
"The only way I can be happy is if you're happy. please go, nd be with draco. Please. But remember, of you need me, for any reason, just tell me," Ron said.
"I'll owl you later," Harry said. Ron nodded and they pulled away. Harry snapped his trunk closed, looked at Ron and smiled a little. Ron smiled back.
I love you, Harry mouthed to Ron.
I love you too, Ron mouthed back. In an instant, Harry dissapeared.
sweetie pie before you say goodbye
remember if he ever leaves you high and dry
don't cry alone in pain, don't ever feel ashamed
if you want me again just don't you worry bout me
I love you no matter what you do
I'll spend my whole life waiting if you want me to
and if he says good-bye you know I'd rather die
than let you see me cry cause then you'd worry bout me
Ron's heart in his chest instantly felt like a vauous black hole, and all of him was sucked through a hole to leave him ragged. He contracted with the emotional pain that had actually turned physical and fell on the bed. He pulled his knees up to his chest and brought Harry's pillow to his face. He smelled the subtle scent of Harry's apple shampoo.
He's probably kissing Draco right now, he thought. Memories, tears, thoughts and daydreams about holding Harry in his arms again kept him busy for hours. He spent the whole day in his bed, not caring about eating or checking on the shop. He eventually drifted off to sleep with one thought on his mind, please be happy, Harry, please be happy.
I'll be strong I'll try to carry on
although you know it won't be easy when you're gone
I'll always think of you, the tender love we knew
but somehow I'll get through so don't you worry bout me
I'll be blue and I'll be crying too
but boy you know I only want what's best for you
what good is over-pride if our true love has died
go on and be his love and don't you worry bout me