I just miss my Tiva. This is a little painful, but there is some hope at the end. It was inspired by the song "Stay" by Florida Georgia Line, and that's about it for this one.

XO
-Toucheblye

But if I told you I loved you would it make you want to stay

The days since he had left her behind had been far from easy. The nights they had spent together had been numbered, yet every day since that last morning he yearned for the feeling he had that morning: the brown curls clustered in a heap on his face, her warm and soft olive skin pressed firmly to his, and the scent of shea butter filling his senses as he awoke to the brisk Israeli morning. And since that experience, the mornings alone were of no comparison.

The window across the room was open, he could see the daylight breaking across the mountains. He opened his eyes further to a heap of curls on his face, he gingerly wiped them out of his face. He could not bear to wake her, the fear of this anticipated day beckoning its arrival by the rising of the sun. The morning breeze came in sending chills up her bare body , the same body that was pressed firmly with his, only the thin sheet keeping them separated from the world. He smiled at the sight, only wishing for this morning could be repeated every day for a lifetime.

He knew the day would come, and he knew she had already given him the answer by the memories they had now shared. The thin line that once had never been crossed was now long forgotten. The line blurred, the choice he made by allowing her to do this on her own was even more hard to bear.

Savoring the final moments of peace before she would arise, he ran his finger down the contours of her body taking in every inch of her to keep for his memories, for his memories would be the only place she would stay for an unknown amount of time. His fingers traced her hip bone and he felt her place her hand on his face.

"Boker tov, ahava. Join me in the shower?" She said as she slowly got out of bed, wrapping the sheet around her body making her way to the bathroom. He sighed as he followed, eager to make their final moments matter.

Without your touch I'm not gonna last.

He wakes up to the first snow covering the nation's Capital, the right side of the bed remaining empty. He reaches out and places his hand on the side, the cold sheets making it all too real that she is not there.

She reaches in the draw for her pants and softly smiles at him while he sits on the bed. She shimmies her pants on and walks over to him, reaching her hands across his neck.

"You are rather quiet this morning." She says as she runs her hand down his cheek.

"There isn't much I can say." He responds.

"We have been through this Tony. It's the only way." She says as she softly kisses his lips. "Let me cook us some breakfast before you leave."

The vibrations of his phone gain his attention. "DiNozzo." He answers as he sits up in his bed. "Tony, we've got a case. I'll meet you in the bullpen with coffee, Bishop is on her way. " McGee says through the phone.

"Okay McGee. See you soon." He stands as he makes his way to the shower, and now another case she isn't here.

The drive to the airport was silent, the car only filled with the sound of their breathing. Their hands were intertwined on the center console. This is the part he dreaded, the part he knew was coming, the part where he hoped the three little words would change her mind.

"Thanks for the coffee McGee." Tony said as he grabbed the coffee.

"Grab your gear… Dead petty officer." Gibbs said as he sipped his coffee and walked out of the bullpen. "Dinozzo take Bishop, McGee you are with me."

Tony sighed, his heart ached, he longed for the words "Dinozzo, take David" to be heard in his ears once more.

Standing on the Tarmac he sees the tears fill her eyes, he takes a step closer.

"Tony… you are so…" She mutters through her tears. He takes a step even closer to her.

"Handsome, funny, what?" He replies. He hates to see her like this, he hates that this has to happen.

"Loved." She responds. And it is on the tip of his tongue, the words he wishes to utter are almost there. But he can't. The words would make this goodbye that much harder, that much more painful. Rather, he pulls her in for a kiss and keeps the words to himself. He kisses her with all he has, because for now this kiss is all they have.

He makes his way towards the elevator, a new parter, a new case. He wishes she were here, he wishes he had his partner back, he is not a fan of new. The new is all he has, along with the three words he kept to himself; He holds on to the words as hope, the hope that one day she will return so he can say the words, the words that will make her stay.

And all I want,
Is to tell you I love you and make you wanna stay.
There's gotta be a way, 'cause going on without you is killing me everyday.