In My Veins
Summary: No matter how many years passed, her memory still haunted him.
Pairing: Jessica Moore/Sam Winchester
Every night for the first few months after Jessica's death, he smelt smoke as he laid in one of the many motel beds. He'd awaken in a cold sweat, thinking that he could stop it only to realize she'd long since been dead. After the smell of fire, he dreamt of her laugh and her long, curly blonde hair and huge green eyes. Her wide smile and her hands against his face or running through his hair. He remembered of how she used to dance in the kitchen in a pair of sweat pants and a tee-shirt, singing at the top of her lungs as she baked.
He hadn't been with another blonde since Jess. None of them could compare. Azazeal had been right about his planning on asking her to marry him. He was going to do it a few days after he got back from hunting with Dean. He had the ring hidden in a pair of socks in his underwear drawer. Sam had never been able to give it to her. Sometimes he wondered if it had melted or maybe somebody had found it. He didn't really know.
Sometimes, he couldn't get to sleep, seeing Jessica burning on the ceiling. Those nights, he'd sit in his room at his and Dean's bunker, looking through the pictures of Jessica still on one of his phones, playing the voice mail over and over. He could never forget what he'd done. How who he was had caused her to be killed. Lucifer had been right when he'd taken on Jessica's form. She was dead from the moment they said hello.
End