What Happened To Bloodberry
This is the story of what happened to me when I tried to get 2 X-Men, I mean one X-Man and a student to be in my fanfics. X-Men are not mine they belong to Marvel. Final Fantasy 8 belongs to Squaresoft or something.
Math Class of X.S.F.T.G…
(Student's are extremely bored)
Storm: That's how you solve Distributive Properties.
(Bobby raises his hand)
Bobby: Miss Munroe. What are Distributive Properties?
Students: (Slaps their foreheads) OYYYYY!
Storm: Bobby! I've been standing here for 2 hrs telling the class everything I know about distributive properties! I'm not explaining it again.
Students: (Wipe their foreheads) Phew.
Bobby: BOOOO!
Jubilee: Shut-up Bobby!
Kitty: Yeah, you want her to start talking again?
Storm: (Angry) That's an hour detention for everyone.
(Students groan)
Bobby: Aww. Raspberries. (Bobby pouts)
Storm: Bobby go stand in the corner.
Bobby: Damn it! (Bobby makes farting noises at Storm)
Storm: BOBBY!!!
(Storm's eyes turn white. She knows she might loose control so she walks outside of the classroom and rubs her temples)
Storm: Sigh.
(Bloodberry walks up to Storm)
Bloodberry: (Cheerfully) Hi!
Storm: Huh? Who are you?
Bloodberry: I'm a new student.
Storm: Oh. (Disappointed) I see.
Bloodberry: If Bobby bother's you so much I could convince him to leave.
Storm: (Desperate) Really?
Bloodberry: Yes, but you have to sign this. (Pulls out a contract thingy)
(Storm frowns and snatches it from her hand)
Bloodberry: Hey! No fair!
Storm: I knew it. You want me to be in one of your fanfics don't you?
Bloodberry: (Irritated because she's been discovered) Yeah. Hey, how'd you know?
Storm: You're not the only fanfiction writer who has talked to me before.
Bloodberry: (Bloodberry comes to realization) Cherry Blossom! (My other cousin, also a fanfiction writer)
(A transparent pale girl with black hair magically appears floating in the air in front of Bloodberry and Storm)
Cherry Blossom: Got ya Kiddo!
(Cherry Blossom suddenly vanishes)
Bloodberry: Ooooh! (Bloodberry is very pissed off) Damn! I should have known she'd defend her favorite X-Man.
(Cherry Blossom appears again floating in the air)
Cherry Blossom: She's not my favorite X-Man! Gambit is…and he will always be.
Bloodberry: Damn…I was so sure Storm was your fave.
Cherry Blossom: Nope. It's Gambit…fuck Bryan Singer. THE HELL WAS HE THINKING? NOT PUTTING GAMBIT IN THE MOVIE!
Bloodberry: Um, Okay.
(An angry Cherry Blossom vanishes)
Storm: (Annoyed) Tell you what, I'll sign it right now if you keep your word and get rid of Bobby.
Bloodberry: …Okay. (Hands contract to Storm)
Storm: How do I know you'll keep your word?
Bloodberry: Umm?
(Storm snatches Bloodberry's ruby necklace)
Bloodberry: Hey!!! That's mine!
(Storm signs the contract and rips the second part. She hands part 1 back to Bloodberry)
Storm: I'll give it back when Bobby is gone. Until then, I'm gonna wear it!
(Storm puts on ruby necklace)
Bloodberry: Crap!!!
(Bloodberry takes out her cell phone. She dials a very long set of numbers)
Bloodberry: Hello is this Balamb G…let me talk to Cid please…(keeps talking on phone)
(Bloodberry's eyes turn from red to bright red, the red strips in her dark brown hair start to glow. Bloodberry finally dematerializes into thin air)
(Storm reads the second part of the contract. Her eyes widen)
(Cherry Blossom appears again)
Storm: Cherry Blossom! You tricked me! You never said it would be 40-year contract!
Cherry Blossom: It's not a 1-fanfic contract?! Sorry. My bad! J
(Storm's eyes start to turn white. She is getting ready to blast Cherry Blossom into oblivion)
(Static electricity crackles around them)
(Cherry Blossom is now very pissed off)
Cherry Blossom: Oh put a sock in it!
(Cherry Blossom raises her hand up high. Using her telekinetic powers she lights Storm's hair on fire using her handy dandy cigarette lighter from a safe distance)
Storm: Ahh! Get it off! Get it off! (Storm tries to grab for the floating cigarette lighter but it goes floating back towards Cherry Blossom's hand)
(Cherry Blossom lights a cigarette)
Cherry Blossom: (Slang) See u laters!
(Cherry Blossom vanishes again)
Storm: Ahhhhh!!!
(Storm runs around like an idiot until she goes in to Professor X's office. The professor is holding a fire extinguisher. Half his office has burn marks. His desk was gone. There's nothing but ashes on the ground)
Storm: PROFESSOR MY HAIR!
Professor X: Huh?
Storm: Give me the [censored] extinguisher you old smelly hippie!
(Storm snatches the fire extinguisher from Xavier's hand. In doing so she knocks Xavier off his wheelchair and wrecks it)
Professor X: (Stupidly) Ohhhhh! I see. Your hair is on fire!
(The weed he was smoking earlier has gone to his head ^-^)
Storm: AHH! (Shakes the fire extinguisher) Work you piece of junk!
(Storm turns the fire extinguisher on her head)
Storm: AHH! (She moans in relief as the foamy substance covers her burned hair)
Professor X: (Looks at what's left of his wheel chair) Oh my god! You broke my beloved wheelchair!
Jean: (From across the hall) You bastard!
Professor X: Storm, this is coming out of your salary.
Storm: Damn it! You will pay Cherry Blossom! You will pay!
(Somewhere out there Cherry Blossom is getting joy from Storm's vow of revenge J)
…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..
Somewhere on X.S.F.T.G…
Jubilee: Bobby, go get us some lunch.
Bobby: HEY! I'm not your servant boy.
Kitty: You owe us lunch!
Blue hair boy: (Accusingly) You are the reason why Miss. Munroe is very pissed off at us!
Kitty: And it's your fault we all have a one-hour detention.
Jubilee: So it's only fair that you go get us some lunch!
Bobby: Sigh, all right. (Grumbles)
(Bobby gets up from the bench and stalks towards the cafeteria. A woman walks out from the shadows)
Bloodberry: You look sad, what's the matter huh?
Bobby: Who are you?
Bloodberry: I'm a new student here.
Bobby: (Curious) What's your power?
Bloodberry: I can control all kinds of elements…and other things.
Bobby: Cool. What kinds o///
Bloodberry: That's not why I wanted to talk to you.
Bobby: What then?
Bloodberry: Bobby, I want you to go away. Far away, just for 2 weeks.
Bobby: Hell I'd love to go away, but I have nowhere else to go.
Bloodberry: I can fix that. Just sign these. (Bloodberry takes out two contracts)
Bobby: I don't think I should be signing any///
Bloodberry: It's just a…uh? Transfer out of school application! Please Bobby, two weeks is all I'm asking.
(Bobby looks deeply into Bloodberry's intense red eyes. He looks so deep that he gets lost in her eyes and looks like some mindless, stupid zombie)
Bobby: (Mindlessly) Okay. (He signs both contracts)
(Bloodberry snatches it from his hands)
Bloodberry: (Happily) YEESSSS!!! That was wayyyyy to easy!!!
Bobby: (Snaps out of it) What are you talking about!
Bloodberry: (Rips part two of both contracts) Here. You really need to read this!
(Bobby snatches both contracts and reads one)
Bobby: No! Not fanfiction. If the///
Bloodberry: Sorry I keep cutting you off but that's not all. (Points to the other contract)
Bobby: (Reads second contract) WHAT!!! Balamb Garden's Military School! Is this some kind of joke?! All I did was sign some stupid out of school application. You've got to be kidding!
Bloodberry: Two weeks my ass! You'll be in Balamb Garden for a long time. That's an 8-year contract.
(Two men come out from the shadows. One with brown hair and blue eyes, and the other with blue eyes, strawberry blond hair, with a tattoo on the right side of his face)
Bloodberry: Squall, Zell, you're here!
(Note: Squall and Zell are from a very prestigious, very rigorous military academy located somewhere in the wilderness on…let's say Canada. It's a mobile school ^-^)
Squall: (Emotionlessly) Is he the new student?
Zell: (Stupidly) Is he the son of Shiva?
Squall: Shut-up Zell.
Bloodberry: Err, yeah.
Zell: Yay! I get to spar with Ice Boy!
Bloodberry: (Points at Bobby) Bake em away toys!
Zell/Squall: What?
Bloodberry: Err, I mean take him away boys. ^^
Bobby: No, you can't do this!
(Squall and Zell drag Bobby outside the school gates where there is a strange looking car that looks like a tank)
Bobby: Somebody help me!
Every single student, teacher and staff on campus: So long Bobby! (They wave good-bye to him)
(Bobby is thrown into the car kicking and screaming and throwing icicles everywhere until Squall and Zell tie his hands together)
Bobby: You guys can't get rid off me so easily!
(The weird tank looking car speeds away)
(Bobby sticks his head out the window)
Bobby: I'll be back! Just wait and see! This isn't the last you've heard of Robert Draaaaake!
TUMPPPP!
(A tree branch hits Bobby in the face)
Bobby: Owww! (He is knocked unconscious)
Bloodberry: All right Storm. Hand over my necklace!
Storm: (Who is wearing a towel on her head) Forget it. I'm not giving you your bloody necklace.
Bloodberry: Hey, Toad's suppose to be the one with the British accent not you!
Storm: My bad! Still, you're not getting it back. You can thank Cherry Blossom for that.
(Storm's eyes go white. A thunderbolt hits Bloodberry)
Everyone: Oooooooh! Look at the pretty sparkles.
(Bloodberry absorbs the electricity)
Bloodberry: You idiot!
(Bloodberry jumps on Storm. They get into a hissy catfight)
Jean: Go Storm! Kick her ass!
Professor X: (From a 50 year old wheelchair) Hmm. I can't decide whom to cheer for. Bloodberry tricked me into signing her fanfic contract. But on the other hand Storm broke my shiny wheel chair. Hmm. (Goes into deep thought)
(Storm is bitch-slapping Bloodberry)
Bloodberry: @_@!
Jubilee: Bitch-slap her Bloodberry!
Kitty: Go Bloodberry! Finish the bitch! She gave me an F-.
Fat kid: She can't act.
Toad: (In a shiny wheel chair) She threw a thunderbolt at me!
(The hissy fight stops)
Bloodberry: Toad! You're not in this fanfic.
Toad: Oh, well...anyways I wish you good luck. She's not so hard to beat really.
Blue hair kid: Unless she decides to fry you!
Toad: Shut-up!
Bloodberry: Thanks. See you next week for the contract thingy.
Toad: CRAP!
(Bloodberry points her finger at Toad and he vanishes back to wherever he came from)
Blue hair kid: Kick the teacher's ASS!
(The hissy fight resumes)
Cyclops: (In a shiny wheel chair) Go Storm! Bitch-slap Bloodberry. She put me in this damn chair!
Jubilee: Hey! Don't copy me RED EYES!
Cyclops: Bite me!
(Jubilee and Cyclops get into another hissy fight)
(Bloodberry finally manages to shoot a red blast from her hand. It hits Storm and she falls down on her ass. Bloodberry grabs back her ruby necklace)
Storm: Oww. My butt!
Bloodberry: I'm so out of here.
(Bloodberry lifts up her left hand and she vanishes into thin air)
Everyone: Bye-bye Bloodberry!
(Jubilee and Cyclops are still in a hissy fight)
Jean: Go Cyclops! You can do it!
Blue hair kid: Yeah! Go Jubes!
(Jubilee uses her fireworks to blast Scott's ruby visor of his face)
Cyclops: Can't see!
Professor X: Go son! Blast that annoying little bitch!
Kitty: You can win Jubilee! Use your fireworks!
(Jubilee gives Cyclops a pyrotechnic punch. Cyclops goes sailing into the air and lands on Xavier)
Fat kid: Jubilee is the winner!
Jubilee: Yay! (She shoots fireworks from her hands)
Professor X: Scott's all sweaty. Get him off! Get him off!
(Both wheelchairs are completely destroyed)
Cyclops: (Dizzily) Why me?
(Blue hair kid tosses a football on Scott's groin)
Cyclops: Ahhhhh! (Faints from the horrible pain of getting hit with a football on the groin)
All Students: Ha-ha!
(Scott revives)
Blue hair Kid: That's what you get for yelling at me! Scottieee!
(Everyone throws pieces of cafeteria food towards Professor X and an almost unconscious Scott. Even Jean Grey ^-^)
Professor X/Cyclops: OWWW!!!
…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………
Somewhere in Orange County, near Disneyland…
Blueberry: You're back! (Perky) Ready to begin your exiting career of help me work in the happiest place on earth?
Bloodberry: Gawd no!
Blueberry: (Excitedly) Did you get everyone's signatures? Did you get the Brotherhood?
Bloodberry: (Still angry from the whole ordeal) Not quite.
…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..
Should I continue with this? Maybe I will. Please review. This time I really think I was too hard on Scott (I Shrug) Oh well! ^-^