Day 5 and I'm still going! I'm not hugely confident writing funny stories, and reading this, it doesn't seem funny enough to be a romantic comedy, but I like the story anyway, and I hope it at least makes you smile.
You Plus Me Does Not Make One
June 2017
"I first met Tom when we were eighteen years old, in Freshers' Week at university," Thomas said to his smartly dressed audience.
Today was Sybil and Tom's wedding day. They had said their vows and said "I do" and they were now sitting at the head table, more in love than they had ever been, anticipating Thomas' best man speech.
"I'd known him for a week before I decided that I had to introduce him to Sybil, who was my best friend from back home in Yorkshire."
Sybil looked at Tom and smiled. She was so glad that Thomas had made the decision to set them up.
"So I set them up on a blind date. Here we are, eight years later and I'm sure most of you are imagining a story of love at first sight; a never-ending bond between two people inseparably in love. Well, that is where you would be wrong."
The crowd laughed and Sybil felt herself blush lightly.
"That first blind date could not have gone worse."
October 2009
"Come on," Thomas said, dragging Sybil out of the car. He had picked her up from home and was delivering her to her blind date with Tom.
"I'm not sure this is a good idea, Thomas," Sybil moaned.
"It's a brilliant idea. You and Tom will get on like a house on fire," he replied.
"No, really, Thomas, I've had a crap day at work and I'm not feeling great. Can't I just reschedule?"
"No," he said, taking her by the hand and leading her towards the restaurant where he had reserved a table for his two best friends.
Sybil huffed and followed Thomas only because she didn't have the strength to pull away from him.
Thomas stopped and looked towards the door of the restaurant.
"He's not even here, Thomas," Sybil whined. "This was a bad idea."
"Look, he's right there," Thomas said, pointing to the other side of the road where Tom was waiting to cross.
"You can't wriggle out of it now Sybil," Thomas teased.
"I hate you," Sybil mumbled, not entirely lying.
"Tom!" Thomas said as Tom approached the two of them. Thomas briefly hugged Tom as way of greeting before introducing him to Sybil. "Tom, this is Sybil; I've known her since we were little. Sybil, this is Tom, my flatmate."
Sybil politely smiled, despite the fact that all she wanted to do was run home.
"Lovely to meet you," Tom said, giving her a kiss on the cheek as greeting.
"You too," Sybil said through a forced smile.
"Your table's booked under my name," Thomas said. "I'm going to bugger off now and leave you two to it." He kissed Sybil on the cheek and gave her a quick hug before making his way back to his car, leaving Sybil and Tom together alone.
Tom took the lead and guided Sybil inside. It was a good thing really. If Sybil had had the chance to take the lead, she would have bailed and never returned.
They were led to their table in the restaurant and began talking to one another, but conversation was stilted.
"So, Thomas said you were a nurse?" Thomas said questioningly.
Great. Small talk. What a great way to start a first date. "Yes," Sybil said, taking a sip of wine. Sybil was three years older than Thomas, but they had been friends since they were children, having lived in the same village and attended the same primary school. Sybil's nursing studies at university had been what inspired Thomas to do a degree in nursing. Thomas was in his first term of studying, and Sybil had recently started her first job as a qualified nurse. "I recently qualified."
"It's such an honourable profession," Tom said. Sybil had heard those words countless times before.
"Mm," Sybil hummed. "It helps when your patients don't all decide to make trouble on one day."
Tom tilted his head slightly to one side and frowned in question.
"Bad day at work," Sybil said, trying to shake it off, but not succeeding. She sighed. "Patients complaining that it's too hot, patients complaining that it's too cold, patients complaining that they're not being given enough attention, complaining about the food, complaining about their surgery being postponed – well I'm sorry, I can't do anything about that – complaining about the visiting hours, complaining about the doctors, complaining about me." She sighed again. "Sorry," she said, half aimed at Tom, half talking to herself. "Crap day."
"Happens to the best of us," Tom said, trying to be comforting.
"I take it you're not studying nursing?" Sybil asked.
"No," he said. "Journalism."
Their conversation lightened in tone, but it never stopped from being a little stilted.
"Tom," a woman said behind Tom. Sybil looked up and took in the sight of her. She was blonde and very slim and beautiful. She was Tom's ex-girlfriend. Tom turned at the sound of her voice and stood up to greet her.
"Julia," he exclaimed, surprised to see her there.
"Oh, is this a date?" she asked, acting as if she wasn't aware. "Am I interrupting something?"
Sybil only smiled politely at her.
"Well, let's hope Tom doesn't break your heart like he broke mine," she said, stirring trouble and knowing it. "Who knew one text could be so soul destroying? Well, enjoy your evening." She walked away from them towards her own group of friends.
Tom was left dumbfounded as he slumped back into his chair. Sybil stared at him with a scowl.
"Really?" she asked, her lips pursed slightly.
"What?" Tom asked, knowing what she was about to say.
"A text? You broke up with her via text?" she asked critically.
"Yeah, well, there's more to the story," he said. "She cheated on me."
"And you think that's a reason to break up via text?" Sybil asked. "It doesn't matter what she did to you, you should at least have the common decency to break up face to face."
Tom's jaw fell open, but he couldn't speak.
Sybil dug around in her bag, looking for her purse. She took out enough money to cover her own meal and pushed it towards Tom across the table.
"Thank you for the evening, but I don't think this can go any further."
She stood up and walked out of the restaurant, leaving her date sitting astonished at the table. She had been right. This date had been a disaster. She never should have agreed to it in the first place. She found a taxi and got a lift home. She reached her phone out of her bag and texted Thomas.
Worst date ever. Thanks for trying. I appreciate the sentiment, but I'm never letting you set me up on a blind date ever again. Xx
She spaced out on the journey home, paid the taxi driver when it pulled up outside her house, and went straight to bed. Perhaps tomorrow would be a better day.
December 2010
It had been a hard few months for Thomas. He had just finished the first term of the second year of his nursing degree and all he wanted to do was throw a party.
So that's what he was doing. He was hosting a Christmas party at his flat and was inviting all of his friends. As his best friend, Sybil was helping him set up for the evening. Christmas paraphernalia decorated the walls and Christmas-themed finger food was laid out on the table. Sybil and Thomas, along with his flatmates, were making their final checks before their guests would start arriving.
Sybil was wearing a form-fitting red velvet dress, which stopped mid-way down her thighs, had long sleeves, and a sweet-heart neckline which showed off her cleavage. Black tights clung to her slender legs, which were lengthened by the red heels which matched her dress. Her make-up was simple but elegant, with red lipstick and a smoky eye. She had recently cut her hair, and wasn't yet sure how to deal with it at such a different length, so she had left the curls to fall naturally. The shortness of her hair lengthened her neck and made her yet more beautiful.
"Oh, by the way," Thomas said to his flatmate William, "Tom said he's not going to make it until about nine."
"Tom's coming?" Sybil shrieked.
"Yeah," Thomas said. "Is that a problem?"
"Tom? The man you set me up with last year which ended in the worst date of my life?" Sybil hollered.
"Oh come on it wasn't that bad," Thomas said.
"It was awful!" Sybil said. "That date couldn't have gone worse."
"He's a friend, Sybil. I lived with him last year. I can't not invite him just because I set you two up on a date that didn't end well."
Sybil huffed. "As long as he doesn't expect me to be nice to him, we won't have a problem."
Luckily, Gwen soon arrived and distracted Sybil from her fury. The party was a success. The house was full of people in the Christmas spirit, dancing to the music and enjoying the food and drink and company. That is, until Tom arrived.
"Oh God," Sybil said.
"What?" Gwen asked, turning around to see what Sybil had spotted.
"Tom's here," Sybil moaned.
Gwen took her by the hand and walked her outside to the garden.
"I don't want to see him," Sybil said.
"Sybil, I'm sure he's not that bad," Gwen said. "He made a mistake. Everyone makes mistakes. Cut him some slack."
"I don't want to cut him some slack!" Sybil said. "I never want to see him again. He's a dick. He doesn't deserve to be forgiven. Oh shit."
Sybil had just spotted Tom coming outside to the garden. He spotted Thomas on the other side of the garden and walked towards him to say hello.
"Sybil, just ignore him. Stay on the other side of the room from him and you won't have a problem."
"Fine," Sybil huffed gently, knowing that Gwen was being reasonable.
"Tom, you made it!" Thomas exclaimed when he noticed him approaching him. He drew him into a hug and included him in the conversation he was having with a few other friends.
Tom stood strategically so that he could surreptitiously glance at Sybil every now and then as she was talking to Gwen.
She was truly stunning. Her dress showed off her figure beautifully and her legs were long and slender under the thin black tights. Her breasts were sitting beautifully in front of her and her hair and make-up complimented her look gorgeously. Tom barely even noticed when the others taking part in the conversation with Thomas went back inside.
Thomas noticed that Tom was staring at something, so he followed his gaze to see that his subject was Sybil. He looked back at Tom and smiled.
"Do you want to go out with her again?" Thomas said to him. Tom instantly snapped out of his trance.
"Sorry?"
"Sybil. Do you want to go out with her again?" Thomas repeated.
"She'll never say yes to another date with me. She hates me," Tom said.
"It's not a mutual feeling is it?" Thomas asked, knowing full well that even if Sybil hated Tom, Tom was still infatuated with Sybil.
"I've liked her since I first met her, Thomas, you know that," Tom said. "I just wish I hadn't screwed up."
"I wish I could get her to agree to another date with you, but she won't have anything to do with it," Thomas said.
"Don't worry, mate," Tom said. "I'll get over her."
With that, he walked back into the house to enjoy the party, out of view from Sybil.
April 2013
Over the past few years, Thomas had been trying, and failing, to get Sybil to agree to going on another date with Tom. Unfortunately for Tom, Sybil was stubborn and wasn't going to let anyone push her around.
Despite her tenacity, it didn't mean that she didn't love her best friend. This love for Thomas was precisely the reason why she dropped everything when she heard that he had been involved in a car crash. Unluckily for Sybil, Tom was close enough with Thomas that he also rushed to the hospital as soon as he heard the news.
"Clarkson!" Sybil exclaimed as she ran into the hospital and practically knocked over her superior. "Where's Thomas?"
Dr Clarkson, who had known both Sybil and Thomas since they were children, pointed behind him and said, "ICU, room seven."
Sybil tried to push past him to make her way to the intensive care unit, but Dr Clarkson took her hand and stopped her. He warned her what would meet her when she found her best friend. "Sybil, he's in a coma. He's not responsive."
"Shit," Sybil said under her breath, breaking away from Dr Clarkson and running to find her best friend. When she reached the right room she ran in and saw Thomas lying motionless in the bed and Tom standing beside him. Sybil ignored Tom and immediately knelt beside Thomas, took his hand and spoke to him.
"Thomas, it's Sybil. Please wake up." Tears were beginning to fall down her cheeks as she stroked Thomas' hand and begged him to gain consciousness. "Please Thomas. You can't leave me. I need you."
Tom had never seen Sybil so vulnerable. She had always shown herself to be strong and able and completely in control. But in this moment, her guard was down and she was exposed. Beautifully exposed.
"How long have you been here?" Sybil sniffed at Tom.
"Only about fifteen minutes," Tom said.
"How did you hear?" she asked.
"William was with him when it happened. He rang me to let me know," he said. "How did you find out?"
"Is William alright?" Sybil asked, worried for her friend.
"He's fine. Walked away unscathed. How did you find out?" Tom repeated.
"Gwen told me. William must have told her and then she told me," Sybil said.
"William told Gwen first?" Tom asked, surprised.
"Yeah, they're kind of a thing now," Sybil said with a smile. She had wanted William and Gwen to get together for years, and now finally they were dating.
"Took them long enough!" Tom said, trying to cast some light on the dreadful situation in front of them.
"Nice to know I'm not the only one who thinks they'd make a good couple," Sybil said, wiping the tears from her cheeks.
"Do you know who else I think would make a good couple?" Tom asked.
Sybil looked sideways at him, remaining by Thomas' side. She knew what he was about to say.
"Us."
He paused, waiting for Sybil's reaction.
She let out a long breath and looked towards Thomas.
"Why don't we give it a go?" Tom suggested. "We're too similar not to give it one last chance. We're both political and stubborn and focused and we care about the same people. So many of your best friends are my best friends. It's only you and me who have never got along."
Sybil looked back at Tom.
"We never really gave it a chance the first time round," he said. "You were having a crap day and Julia made me look like the worst man on the planet."
"You broke up via text," Sybil said, remembering the night of the worst date of her life as if it were yesterday.
"There's more to that story than you think," Tom said. "Maybe if you go out with me, you'll get to hear the story one day. Will you? One date. If it's bad I'll never bother you again. But I feel like we owe it to ourselves to just try again."
"Okay," Sybil said with a small sigh. She was tired and she was stressed because of Thomas. But Tom had made her realise that the two of them were fundamentally very similar. They really could work together. "Let's try again."
Tom smiled to himself. He didn't quite know how to react. He wasn't fully expecting her to agree to another date. It didn't help that they were in the most unromantic environment possible with their mutual best friend lying unconscious between them with a few cuts and grazes from his collision.
"But I'm not doing anything until we know that Thomas is okay," Sybil said. "When he wakes up and we know he's recovered, then I'll go out with you."
"If he wakes up," Tom corrected.
"When he wakes up," Sybil said firmly. "He's stronger than people think he is."
A nurse knocked on the door and let herself in.
"Visiting hours are over," she turned to go, but looked back at Sybil. "What are you doing here? I didn't think you were working today."
"I'm not," Sybil said. She and the nurse, Rebecca, had trained together and knew each other well. "Thomas is my best friend. I'm here as a visitor, not as a nurse."
"Oh, I'm sorry," she said sympathetically. "We'll keep an eye on him, make sure he recovers."
"Thank you," Sybil said.
Rebecca left Sybil and Tom alone with Thomas. They knew they had to make their way out, but they could hardly pull themselves away from Thomas' bedside. More tears, from both of them, and a lot of mumbled goodbyes to Thomas passed before they finally walked out of the hospital.
"How did you get here?" Tom asked.
"Taxi," Sybil said simply.
"I can give you a lift home," Tom said.
"Oh, no, I couldn't ask you to do that," she said quickly.
"You're not asking. I'm offering. It's really no trouble."
"Alright," Sybil said.
They were quiet on the car journey. They were both still shocked about the events of the day and weren't sure how to feel about it. Tom pulled up outside Sybil's house, turned off the engine and looked over to the passenger seat, expecting to see Sybil opening the door to get out. Instead Tom found her staring back at him. The tension between them was palpable. Sybil reached over to Tom, slid her hand to the back of his head and brought his lips to hers.
Tom was taken by surprise. This isn't at all what he had expected. He didn't know where to put his hands. He was still sitting facing forward. Who had ever kissed over the car like this?
Sybil pulled away suddenly, sitting back in her seat.
"Sybil," Tom croaked.
"Sorry," she whispered, opening the door and mumbling a thank you for the lift before hurrying up her garden path.
"Wait," Tom said, getting out of the car himself and following Sybil up the path.
He took her by the waist and spun her around to face him. Without saying a word, he leant down and locked his lips with hers.
When he broke away, he continued to hold her body close to his.
"Really?" Sybil said breathily.
"Really," Tom said.
He placed his lips softly on hers again.
"What about Thomas?" Sybil said. It wasn't a romantic thought, but it was the one on her mind. It somehow didn't feel right to get involved with Tom if Thomas was still in a coma.
"He's the one who set us up in the first place. He would tell us to get our clothes off and get on with it!" Tom laughed.
Sybil did too.
"I won't do anything if you don't want to," Tom said.
Sybil took his hand and led him inside. She took him upstairs to her bedroom.
"I want you," she purred.
June 2017
"But here we are, eight years down the line, and I think I can say that my mission to set these two up has been successful. If only I had known a car crash was all it would take, I would have got myself in one a lot sooner!"
The wedding guests laughed at Thomas' comment. His retelling of Sybil and Tom's love story had been beautiful and touching and hilarious. If anyone knew how to make a boring love story appear dramatic, it was Thomas.
"When Tom told me that he and Sybil were engaged and that he wanted me to be his best man, I jumped at the chance. In my life I've seen very few people as in love as these two are," Thomas said. "So I think we should all raise a toast," he lifted his glass, encouraging everyone else in the room to do the same, "to Sybil and Tom. May they be forever happy together, and, for the record, if this marriage ends in disaster, I'm not willing to take the blame!" The room laughed along with him. "To Sybil and Tom!"
There was a chorus around the room repeating his final words.
Sybil looked at Tom lovingly and knew that she had made the right choice. Tom was absolutely the right man for her.
Thomas sat down beside Tom and grinned at the newlyweds.
"Thank you, Thomas," Sybil said, looking past her husband.
"Anything for my two best friends," Thomas said.
His speech had been funny, even if slightly embarrassing for Sybil and Tom at times, but that didn't stop them from loving every word. Thomas really had outdone himself. He loved his best friends and wanted nothing more than for them to be happy on their wedding day and for the rest of their lives.