I'm sorry for the angst, I really am. But I was stuck without internet the whole day yesterday, and it was the only thing to keep me occupied.

The scene takes place some weeks or months from the current Glee episodes. Please don't kill me though. (Reason at the bottom, because I don't want to give away too much.)

„So I hope you're happy now!" Kurt yelled, the door banging close behind him.

Sebastian, who had been sitting over an open textbook with a huge cup of coffee next to it, looked up in surprise, a knowing grin following right after.

"Well, whatever you speak of, can we delay it for a little? We could meet up in an hour or so at the Lima Bean" he smiled calmly.

"Don't even try that on me, Smythe!" Kurt shot back, pacing over to the table and placing both of his hands on it. "We are going to settle this right now, right here."

Sebastian threw his hands up, don't even bothering to wipe away the satisfied smirk on his face.

"I don't know what you're talking about." He took his time with the words. He wasn't in a hurry.

Kurt grew even more furious over the other guy's quietness.

"How long have you been cheating with Blaine?" he spat, and by saying it out loud he fed his own suspicions even more.

Kurt didn't want to believe it. He wanted Sebastian to laugh at his silliness and deny that there had been anything going on between the two. But he doubted, he doubted everything his relationship had been – the honesty, the loyalty – and he needed to be sure, even if it would hurt.

Deep down inside he knew exactly what was going to happen. Sebastian would either manifest his worries by saying clearly that something had been going on, or he would reply with some unclear, ironic statement that would only fuel his inner confusion. Kurt knew that Sebastian wasn't good guy, he knew that Sebastian wouldn't be honest if it meant he could break up him and Blaine.

And yet somehow, he kept running in that pointed knife that was Sebastian Smythe, searching for the pain and for the hurt, ready to take any of his answers for bare fact.

"Oh, I wouldn't say I was cheating with him" he said gallantly, reaching for his coffee. "Blaine came running right into my open arms."

Kurt gasped, his face fell and he had to close his eyes for a moment to be able to hold back the tears that wanted to come out desperately. He couldn't show weakness. Not now.

The part of him that knew exactly that Sebastian was lying sat gagged in a corner of his mind, while all the emotions flooded it, drowned any common sense Kurt might have had before and left only open and rare feelings. Feelings that made Kurt believe what Sebastian was saying and that wanted to punch him in the face while they weakened his arms at the same time.

"No … Blaine wouldn't do that …" he whispered, barely able to bring out the words. He looked down at the warm brown of the table. If he'd looked at Sebastian right now, he would loose control, not get the information he needed and torture himself to sleep weeks following.

"Poor Kurt" Sebastian said softly, slowly closing his textbook. "Of course you'd think that. It must hurt to be so oblivious. But, I guess …"

He rose from his chair and crossed over to Kurt, who gripped his fists hoping to catch a coherent thought.

As he was less than an arm's length away, he lowered his voice. "… I guess he wanted more. Something you couldn't give him."

Kurt looked straight ahead, his vision blurry. He refused to turn towards Sebastian, who had just spoken out the fears Kurt had had all along.

This was hell.

Blaine had told him not to be such a control freak, to let go of it. It all made sense now.

He probably liked that. To be pursued by two boys at a time, who wouldn't want that? It was the adventure Blaine was always seeking.

Most likely he wasn't even aware of Kurt's feelings, just the way he hadn't been aware of them the first months they had known each other. That would explain so much. Maybe he thought it was normal to be with two guys. Maybe he didn't believe in monogamy.

Maybe he got tired of Kurt, the silly romantic and wanted change. Just like he had feared from the beginning. Maybe Blaine got a sick thrill out of cheating.

In the middle of his dark, unsettling thoughts Kurt felt a hand on his back.

"I'm sorry" mumbled Sebastian, his voice tender as always, and despite everything he had done, Kurt couldn't deny that those two little words comforted him.

Funny, the guy who had caused all his pain was now the one to make him feel better.

"Look at me, Kurt."

Sebastian turned him around, so they were facing each other, both of his hands on Kurt's shoulders now.

"Blaine's an ass" he smiled, one corner of his mouth tilted up more than the other.

But Kurt was too lost to notice. His filter was gone, all he wanted was comfort, somebody that told him that he was in the right. It didn't matter anymore who told him.

Hell, it didn't even matter that it was Sebastian, the guy he hated with all his guts.

The Warbler stepped closer.

"You shouldn't worry about him anymore" he whispered, and his voice was everything that Kurt could hear. Not the muffled calls of his name outside in the hallway that came closer with every moment.

His heart was aching, and he could comprehend nothing but the single voice that didn't tell him that he deserved being cheated on, or left or broken up with; both in and outside of his head.

"Relax, Kurt …"

And with that, Sebastian kissed him.

At any other moment, just seconds ago, Kurt would have been at least surprised, mostly shocked or simply outraged by this action.

But his walls had come down, he was too broken to react in an appropriate way.

He had spent the entire time since the fight working himself up over the fact that he wasn't good enough, of a boyfriend, of a person, whatever; solidified in the fact that Blaine had obviously been with Sebastian and all he had believed in with their relationship had been flying right out of the window.

Kurt had reached the peak of his misery, and Sebastian shamelessly took advantage of him.

It was possibly the only time Kurt would ever do something like that.

He usually wouldn't allow anybody to kiss him without his consent, not after Karofsky. But he was low, really low, and Sebastian was there and he acted like he cared, and Kurt felt like he wouldn't get to kiss anybody soon anyways, so what could possibly be wrong.

He closed his eyes and opened his mouth, drowning his sorrow in the feeling of a hot tongue licking over his lips and a firm grip on his back, Sebastian's body weight pushing him towards the wall.

There was the sound of the door springing open, but he didn't want to think of anything besides getting lost, he imagined Blaine kissing him, kissing him as an apology, after swearing to never jump at Sebastian's texts again …

Oh god.

Kurt's state of weakness rushed away as fast as it had come, as he realized what he was doing; how stupid he'd been acting, what person he was doing it with. Still without opening his eyes, not daring to, he pushed his hands forward, trying to get rid of the strange body on him before he was forced to look his mistake in the face. He heard gasping, and it sounded like more than one person.

No.

No.

He couldn't have done that. He couldn't have kissed another guy. It was wrong.

Kurt clenched his teeth, ready to scream at Sebastian, what the hell he was thinking, to make clear once and for all that he would not fall for his sick games, whatever the final intention. Inhaling deeply, he tried to prepare for the satisfied smile that would surely greet him.

But as he opened his eyes, reality was far more terrifying.

As expected, Sebastian stood a few inches in front of him, wiping his mouth with a nonchalant movement of his arm.

In the open door to Kurt's left side stood Blaine, his expression frozen in utter shock and disbelief.

Sebastian's eyes wandered between them. The grin on his face was even smugger than it had been before. He didn't even try to hide how pleased he was with the outcome of his actions.

Probably he'd been planning it from the beginning.

"I'm impressed, Kurt" he remarked, ignoring the tension in the room. "I wouldn't mind to get sucked off by you after that."

Blaine said nothing. He only stared at him for a brief second before he turned and ran.

Kurt felt like someone had punched all air out of his lungs.

"I hate you" he said, and it came out far too whiny and uncertain, because he was crying now, unable to hold his tears any longer, as the situation had worsened so much.

Then he followed Blaine through the corridors of Dalton.

"Blaine, what's going on with Sebastian?" Kurt asked slowly as they were in his room, him lying on the bed while Blaine tried to set up the old stereo he had found in his uncle's abandoned storeroom.

Blaine looked at him in surprise.

"What should be going on?" he asked back, turning to the ancient buttons and scales again.

Kurt sat up, putting emphasize on every word.

"I just noticed that lately … you have been spending some time with him. Like, a lot."

Blaine finally noticed that this was a serious conversation and sat down on the floor, leaning against the wall.

"Kurt, we've been over that. He wants to get some Warbler advice, and since there are some shows coming up for him, he needs my help more. We're friends."

"Well, shouldn't he be able to figure out his performances on his own?" Kurt suggested observantly, tilting his head slightly.

"Do you want me to deny him help when he asks for it?" Blaine frowned.

"No … But he's gay, Blaine! And I don't trust him!" Kurt stroked his thighs uncomfortably, because he knew exactly what he sounded like. But it couldn't be helped; he needed to get his concerns out.

Blaine opened his mouth for a response, then shut it again.

"Look, Kurt" he said as a second try, searching for the words carefully while looking Kurt straight in the eyes, pausing after every sentence. "You make it sound like I wouldn't have a say in that matter. But I'm not a child anymore. I can act on my own, you know? I'm … I'm disappointed in you. Really. I thought …" – he swallowed heavily – "I thought we could trust each other. I though you would trust me."

Kurt flushed deeply. He had seen that coming. Anyways, he didn't mean his response to come out so angrily.

"Blaine, I've seen him, I've talked to him! He wants you! But instead of telling him off, you keep going back to him, like a moth goes for the light!"

"Oh really?" Blaine jumped up, pacing around the room. "I can't remember treating him much differently than other friends!"

"You blew me off two nights in a row because he wanted to have extra practice for his damn solo!"

Blaine stopped walking, his eyes narrowing as he crossed his arms.

"So that's what this is all about" he said quietly, but Kurt could sense his suppressed anger. "You're jealous, aren't you Kurt? You can't deal with the fact that I don't need to spend every minute with you!"

"No!" Kurt shouted and got up himself. "That's not at all …"

"Guess what" Blaine interrupted angrily, "I love you and everything, but my world does not. Revolve. Around. You." He gestured widely with every word.

They fell silent rapidly after that, breathing heavily.

Kurt felt the tears burning in his eyes.

"It's pretty hard to believe that you love me at all right now" he said in a small voice.

Blaine choppily sucked in air. "Tell me about it" he mumbled darkly before turning around and walking out of the door.

He stopped for a moment to look back at Kurt. "I'm meeting Sebastian tonight, if you don't have any other plans. Call me when you got over the fact that you are not the only man in my life" he spat.

Kurt sank back in his pillow, weeping as he heard the door slamming.

Blaine was going to meet Sebastian. They'd had a fight, and now he would go to meet Sebastian.

He felt his worries tightening like dark clouds in the sky on a storm night.

Kurt caught up with him in his car. Even though he'd thought it impossible, his heart dropped a little more when he saw the sheer desperation in which Blaine simply sat in the driver's seat, staring at the steering wheel like it was a device from outer space, motionless like a puppet whose strings had been cut.

Although it was probably a terrible thing to do, Kurt opened the right door and dropped on the seat next to him.

Blaine didn't move. Kurt wished he could stop crying.

"Blaine, listen … I didn't want it to happen. I mean, … I know, it probably looked like it, but I didn't mean to, I just …" his voice trailed off, muffled by his sobs that kept rolling through his body.

"You seemed to like it" Blaine spoke quietly. It scared Kurt. Usually, he was so open with his emotions; he never bottled them up or tried to put a mask over them. At least not when he was with him.

"Oh god, Blaine!" he cried, feeling too sorry to even put it in words, "I felt so terrible … so, so angry, and I couldn't stop thinking you'd cheated on me, and that the only guy who ever looked at me twice didn't want me anymore … and I felt so wrong, okay? And all I wanted … I wanted to feel loved, I didn't … I didn't realize it wasn't the same, it was you on my mind, do you get me? I thought it was you …"

Kurt knew he was rambling, and he wanted to stop and form proper sentences to explain the strange things he'd been feeling, but he found himself unable to do so.

Eventually he joined Blaine in staring forward, his tears finally drying out. His face was swollen from crying, but inside he just felt empty. Frozen.

Finally, after what felt like hours, Blaine looked up. Now Kurt could see how wet his eyes glistened, besides his composure the whole time, and he felt even worse.

"Kurt" he started, and his voice was deadly calm, not shaking a little bit. Kurt knew right away what was coming up. Not the exact wording of it, but definitely what Blaine was aiming to get across. His mind raced, panicking, searching for solutions to stop the inevitable, but he knew he couldn't do anything about it anymore.

"After I left your house earlier, I started to understand your point. I realized what I'd told you, and that I used some very unfortunate wording. Also, I started beating myself up over the last words I said to you, and that I should probably set them straight and apologize to you. It took me some time to finally make up my mind to go back though."

Kurt buried his face in his hands. This was too much. Blaine wasn't allowed to be so sensible, he just couldn't be.

"When I got to your house, your car was gone. My fist thought, you know …" Blaine chuckled brokenly, "I thought you'd left to jump off a bridge or something, that's how guilty I felt by the time. Then I thought it through again, and what exactly you'd been saying, and what I'd been saying, and I came to the conclusion that you were off to speak your mind to Sebastian."

Blaine laughed to himself quietly, although Kurt was unsure if it wasn't sobbing instead.

"So I came here to stop you from hurting anybody. I … I saw us healing. I saw me storming into a big fight scene, screaming my apology, and putting an end to my friendship with Sebastian. In my vision, you were running in my arms happily after that. But then …"

He stopped, licking his lips. Kurt wanted to kiss them so bad. He wanted to press his own lips on them, taste them, replace the flavor of Sebastian in his mouth with Blaine's.

But he couldn't do it. They weren't like that anymore.

"You know what happened" Blaine continued bitterly. "I hope you also know how my world fell into tiny pieces when I saw you like that."

"Blaine, I'm so sorry …" Kurt replied weakly, but he knew that it was too late for apologizing.

"It's okay" Blaine said, strangely cheerful, looking away again. "It's ironic, don't you think? You're worrying about me cheating all the time, and then you're the one to actually do it."

He sighed.

"I'm gonna tell you know how I'd apologized. I would have told you that you were right. That I enjoyed it too much to have someone going after me; that I refused to see that though. That a part of me felt like I was cheating every time."

Blaine started to massage his temples with closed eyes.

"I thought about it. How it would be like. If it would be any different. But I never would have allowed Sebastian to kiss me like that, Kurt. And I'm … I'm sorry, Kurt, but …"

His voice was trembling, and Kurt dug his nails in the car's dashboard, to have anything to hold on to during the worst part.

"I don't think our relationship will work like that. I want it to. But whenever I'll kiss you, I'll think about the day you chose to kiss Sebastian. Whenever… whenever I'll say I love you, I'll think about the day you didn't love me enough to be stronger than … that."

"Blaine, I love you!" Kurt said desperately.

Blaine smiled sadly. "I don't blame you, Kurt. Take your time to figure things out, okay? I love you so much …"

"Then don't leave me!"

" … I don't want to hold you down or anything. Stop you from experiencing more. Just … take care, okay?"

Kurt really wanted to blink away the tears that had returned, despite his feeling of being dried out already. But why, why, why?

They loved each other, for god's sake, why would they break up?

While his heart tore apart, his brain understood. The trust was gone. The honesty was gone. And, as he realized bitterly, a relationship couldn't live only on love.

"I think … I think I should go" he said, his tongue thick.

"Yes, you probably should" Blaine muttered.

"I'm sorry" Kurt whispered a last time before he slipped out of the car, well aware that it wouldn't change anything.

He was numb as he walked towards his own car. He hated everything right now. Especially Sebastian. And the world. Just not Blaine. Kurt could never hate Blaine.

Reason why you shouldn't kill me: This is a written out headcanon of mine (the angsty version), and in said headcanon Kurt and Blaine might have broken up, but they will get back together again. Maybe, if I'm feeling like it, I will write that, too.