Author's note: third fic posted tonight, one of my personal favourites
Softness is everywhere. The air feels soft, swirling around the room like a cool mist that settles refreshingly against my flushed cheeks. The duvet I'm wrapped in is incredibly soft, coating my body in comfort, smooth against my skin. I myself feel soft, like my bones are malleable, my muscles have melted and the blood pumping through my veins is warm melted chocolate. It's such a wonderful sensation, to be this utterly relaxed, to feel so beautifully content that time stops and the world doesn't matter.
I let out the laziest of sighs as I pull myself further up Warner's chest, resting my head on his collarbone as strands of damp hair fall into my eyes. He moves them away. The glow from bedside lamp on his side is hot against my closed eyelids, turning my world into a spectrum of red. The flutter of lips against my temple causes another sigh to fall from my mouth, followed by a small hum of contentment as I nuzzle in closer, my nose only just skimming his throat.
"Comfortable?" he whispers. I hum in affirmation.
"Good."
I drape one arm over his bare chest, resting it symmetrically from my head. Warner then covers my hand with his, moving his thumb in circles over my wrist, unravelling the cramp that had formed from supporting myself over him. I feel almost ready to drift off to sleep, but I know I don't want to. Instead I just focus on finding any sounds in this silent room, usually my ears only fall upon our steady breathing and I thought tonight would be the same, but then I hear it.
"listen," I whisper.
"Hmm," Mumbles Warner, jerking his head upwards from where it was lounged against the pillow. My head turns a fraction so our eyes meet, catching me with his look of mild confusion.
"It's raining," I explain, watching his face shift into focus as his ears try and find the light pattering noise from the downpour that is currently happening outside of our window. I've always loved listening to the sound of the rain, watching the rain fall. It was always an unusual form of entertainment when I was confined to the unrelenting miseries of my own mind. Now it's just a soothing sound with rings of the past and echoes of what now feels like an almost forgotten time. I find it incredibly relaxing.
Warner grins at me. His dimples are showing in cheeks so lightly flushed, and his smile is so wide and his gaze feels soft as he studies my excitement at a simple weather occurrence. He's propped up on one elbow, his hair probably the messiest I've ever seen it, tousled at the back from friction against the pillow and hanging in his eyes from where my hands tugged it out of its expertly styled perfection. He looks so adorably amused right now that I think it's impossible for me not to inch closer and press my lips to his. He catches my lips in the briefest of kisses before settling back down against the pillow, allowing me to rest my head back against his chest, listening to the gentle rhythm of the rain drumming hard against the ground outside.
"Doesn't it make you want to go out and stand in it?" I sigh lazily, feeling the excess energy from my excitement over the rain start to buzz in my chest, not only does the sound of rain soothe me, but knowing that there is water falling from the sky always spurs some kind of urge to stand amidst it and experience nature for all it has, especially after being confined for so long. A breathy laugh falls on my ears.
"No," Warner answers, seeming vaguely curious as to why I would even suggest it.
"Why not?" I wonder, the enthusiasm dripping from my voice despite expecting such an answer. He sighs.
"Well first of all it's approaching eleven pm," he begins to list, tilting his head to one side as he considers all the practical reasons why we should not be outside right now. "And secondly I don't think that it would be entirely appropriate." His voice sounding a touch more humoured, his eyes falling down over his chest to my bare shoulders, and I laugh when I realize what exactly he is referring to.
"I didn't mean right this second," I exclaim, stifling the giggles caught in my throat as my cheeks turn pink. "I meant getting dressed, obviously."
"Putting on clothes for the sole purpose of getting them wet and potentially ruined does not seem like a good idea," he speculates, sounding as if the whole idea is completely ridiculous to him. I struggle to stifle a smirk, knowing that his first thought in this situation would of course be clothes.
"Trust you to see it that way," I say with an amused scoff.
"Well how else am I supposed to see it?" he counters, his tone more serious that it probably should be. The predictability of this situation is amusing me to no end.
"As fun," I explain. He scoffs like the very thought is unimaginable.
"Wet clothes are definitely not my idea of fun," He states rather seriously. I'm trying not to dissolve into a pit of giggles, trying to stop having them burst through my mouth like bees from a hive and consume me.
"How many waterproof coats do you own?" I question him, raising my eyebrows.
"Irrelevant," He replies hastily, almost smiling.
"How?" I say disbelievingly, a tone of mock exasperation ringing in my voice.
"Coats are not the only item of clothing that come into contact with rain," He explains, and the more serious he sounds, the less likely I am to keep a grip on the giggles that morphed into full on laughter that sit trapped inside my voice box, ready for the cage doors to be lifted so they can spring free.
"I give up," I exclaim with a sigh, accompanied by an exaggerated rolling of my eyes. For a second I watch Warner look smug before settling back against his shoulder, his arm folding around me as I make myself comfortable. Silent minutes pave over our previous discussion, filling in the cracks of loud conversation with only the sound of the pouring rain. I start to feel that the world is once again, soft. I feel so contented that I might be up in the clouds, shrouded in the soft, dense matter that's causing the rain to fall. I feel like I could be a raindrop, free falling without a care in the world before crash landing to earth with a heavy splatter.
"I will admit that it creates a rather soothing sound," Warner says eventually, breaking the few moments spent listening to nothing but the world outside these four walls. And despite the rain falling to second priority of my ears, I smile.
"That's why I like it," I explain. "I spent so long listening to it fall, watching it, without ever feeling it on my skin that I suppose I've developed some kind of comfort from it."
"Interesting," he muses.
"But now I want to just go out there and run around in it," I state, resulting in an amused huff of breath hitting my temple.
"Not tonight love, it sounds like its getting worse out there," He insists, his voice soft with entertainment. I respond with a look of mock upset.
"Do you think it could thunder?" I ask.
"Why, does it frighten you?" he replies softly.
"No, I like listening to it," I correct him, and then as if on cue, a loud clap of thunder sounds through the air, rattling the rain and pushing it down harder, so it now thrashes loudly though the air and pounds on our window. By the sounds of it the rain will soon turn into a storm.
"I think you have your answer," he laughs.
"I wonder if it will last all night," I sigh, more to myself than to Warner.
"I have no idea," He answers anyway.
"It seems strange to think," I start to wonder aloud. "How much has changed since the days I spent listening to the rain, longing to be outside with it, without hope that it could actually be a possibility." I think of the days where all I had was four walls and counting seconds, hours, days wondering when they would finally kill me. When I was so trapped inside of my own mind that all I had to keep me sane was that window and my words and a hope that refused to be abandoned. When feeling the rain on my skin was just a dream and the sound of the rain drowned out screams rather than the voice and heartbeat of another person. It all seems such a long time ago now, like a bad dream.
"It seems a whole other world away, like it never even happened at all," My thoughts fall out of my mouth.
"Juliette," Warner interrupts slowly, his voice tender, letting me know that I don't have to talk about it if I don't want to, but I want to. It feels good to acknowledge how much has changed for the better since then, how I'm no longer that frightened little girl but a strong, powerful one who has achieved so much.
"It's okay," I assure him. "I'm happy."
"That is all I want for you to be," He mutters, causing my heart to stop for a second. I squeeze him against me, showing him how much I appreciate that he cares. I let go of him as an idea springs to mind.
"I'd be happier if we could go outside and-" I begin to tease, but he cuts me off.
"Don't start," He murmurs playfully into my hair. I snuggle against him as if preparing myself for sleep. My eyes are starting to strain and I feel a yawn start to creep up my throat. I tell him goodnight.
"Next time," He whispers quietly against my head, so softly I almost don't hear him.
"What?" I ask sleepily, lifting my head to look at him. His eyes gleam with the soft look I've come to recognise as defeat, a lazy smile paints his face.
"Next time I will go out in the rain with you," He declares, a subtle hint of reluctance in the undertones of his voice. I meet him with a smug smile that his face tells me he was expecting before I settle back down, muttering some kind of thank you melted together with a goodnight. He turns of the bedside lamp and I close my eyes, safe, warm and secure, comfortably juxtaposed against the storm raging outside. With a heavy breath I have one last thought of the past, reminding myself that's the storms that once plagued my mind are now over, shut away out of reach like the streams of water falling from the sky. As I ready myself I listen to both Warner's heartbeat and the rain, the two most relaxing sounds in the world lulling me to sleep.