-----Thank you for reading my story------
I apologize now for any funny spacing mess ups...my comp.. Likes to group words together.
Forgive miss spellings and grammar. I have no beta...or time to really check this...
I beg of you...please review...I have only ever had about 3 reviews from people I didn't already know... I NEED to know if anyone likes this and wants me to do what I already planed...to do another chap. from Kratos POV. No reviews no new chap. Sorry.
If you have ever read or would like to read my story Blanket...I beg you to reread it now that I have fixed the spacing problems. Please leave a review !
----I own nothing------
It's a funny thing, being able to stand in a sea of people, and still be completely invisible.
Lloyd rested on an older, slightly more used, bed in his singles inn room. Apparently the people of Heimdall didn't get enough visitors to complain about the shabby state of its local inn to really care, and taking into account his own groups "warm" welcome, Lloyd didn't doubt it. Not to mention you had to go threw a bloody maze to even get to the damn village.
Opening one red tinted eye, he smirked at the memory.
Not that the entire trip across the puzzle had been bad. Indeed, it had been very amusing when Colette had tripped on that tree root (again) and had fallen on poor Genis, who in turn, fell into the river about three inches away from one of those giant man eating fishes. It had been great until Raine started to beat him up for laughing at her brothers' plight.
But now he was stuck here, in this old village, in this old hotel, in his old bed, with one old spring digging into his hip.
Rubbing his face with his now callused hands, he sat up.
He was avoiding what he really should be thinking about and he knew it. The others had understood his need to be alone and think about his problems and had left him alone for the night. Of course, that didn't mean he really wanted to think about them. Tomorrow...tomorrow he was to fight Kratos. Tomorrow he was supposed to raise his sword against... his father.
Lloyd jolted jerkily to his feet and staggered to the window. Resting his flushed face against the cold glass, he closed his eyes as he trembled slightly.
How could he not have noticed this? How could he have been so blind?!?!? This man that looked and acted so much like himself, who had acted the part of a fellow swords men, a teacher, a mentor, a...father.
Lloyd fell to his knees and choked back a sob as his body shuddered. His eyes shut tight, and his hands fisted the carpet beneath him. Teeth clenched as he forced back his tears. His friends depended on him to be strong and he could not, would not, let himself lose all control and fall apart.
But...
Lloyd fisted his hair.
This was his father! The man he had always imagined! The man he had always hoped, however secretly, might one day show himself. He thankful of Dirk, without a doubt, but Kratos...he was the one who had triggered Lloyds strange visions. Times of happiness with a faceless man were he was very small. The thrill of getting a piggy back ride, a weightless feeling with wind rushing by his face, looking together at the stars...and always the strange smell combination of peppermint and cinnamon.
These small tidbits of memory were so important to him he had never shared them with anyone, not even Dirk. His own personal reminders of parents he had never known and never thought he might know.
Lloyd's small world did have a bight spot before it came down and shattered all to hell.
He had first started on the Journey of Regeneration for a different reason than he assumed everyone thought. Yes, he had hated Designs back then, but it was for the fact that he would not allow two of the few people who actually gave a dam about him the chance to die. He would not allow for them to simply become memories. He wouldn't have been able to stand it if they had gone that way. Just like his parents. It was because of his reluctance to leave he had first met Kratos. That tall, infuriating, purple warring, "machinery".
When they had first started traveling together with the rest of the gang, he couldn't help but be annoyed with odd fashioned man. He was refined, knew how to think in the heat of battle, was so graceful with his sword it bordered on ridiculous, and so many other little small things he thought he might actually go mad. But there was one thing that had irked him the most out of all things...he had smelled like peppermint.
Lloyd had imagined the discomfort between the two of them to be equal, so he had been utterly stumped when the more experienced man had first offered his assistance in Palmacosta. It had been the start of an amazing friendship. There training times became longer and longer. They talked more (well, more like Lloyd laughed and joked around more, and Kratos was either amused or annoyed...mostly the later...). Lloyd even found himself breaking into a smile just seeing the guy!
Lloyd would be eternally grateful for Dirks love and guidance (even if he loved to complain about the Dawrvin Vows) and was proud that the man called him his son. When Lloyd looked at Kratos, he saw the same love/hate caring/utter annoyance in his eyes that were the same as Dirks. He understood that this was how the man showed that he cared, even if he was a bit cold sometimes. If he looked long or hard enough at the human statue that was Kratos Aurion he could just about see past the cracked mask the silent man always seemed to wear. Lloyd had silently vowed that one day he would try to see what was behind that mask.
But of course, all good things worth having come to an end.
Kratos had betrayed them. He had left them for dead, said such bad things, and even raised his own sword against him! But even after all he done or said he hadn't had it in himself to truly hate the man. He could not stop himself from reflecting on old battles, how in there own battle he had held back, how his haunted eyes seemed to peer into his very soul as the group had started to get on the Dragons on the way to the Tower of Salvation. He had been angry with the angel, maybe even confused or scared, but never did he completely hate him.
And then when Lloyd had thought his life and mind could not possibly take anymore; he was hit with news that literally shook the foundations of his entire world.
The man that so inspired confusion, pain, hurt, caring, compassion, and understanding, was his father. And Lloyd had never felt more conflicted about something in his life.
He had been so angry and scared of him. So unready to believe. There were so many questions. Why! Why had he left him for dead! Why, if he had known I was his son, had he betrayed me again!
Why when Mithos was about to kill me had he saved my life?
But most of all, why had it hurt so much?
Lloyds band of misfits had then decided to regroup in Flanoir. Everyone had been shaken by the previous nights events, but none so much as himself. Lloyd had felt empty, so emotionally exhausted that he had felt a great hole fill in his chest. He had slunk off away from the others to bed early. Escape had seemed so close until he had heard a noise. And there had stood the human ambiguity Kratos Aurion himself.
The walk outside was probably the longest one so far of his life. So many of his questions...and he could not say a word. They had both reached the platform that over- looked the snowy city. He had turned around slowly. For a moment he had been able to see that sad, haunted look in his fathers eerily similar red eyes. It was a look he had known was more than likely reflected on his own. We started to talk.
I don't know if he will ever understand how much that conversation meant to me.
He told me things of mom, and what had really happened that hellish day back in Iselia. And to my great relief (though he would never have known) he had made me see that my worst fear since childhood was not true. My father hadn't left my behind because he hadn't loved me. No...and by the way he had been talking I had a feeling that was far from true. And it was this that made the whole world of difference to me. It was around then that things started to make more since to me...the vague flashes of memory, even that strange peppermint smell that reminded me of home...and it all came from him.
Lloyd now sat in the corner of the small room, his knees pulled to his chest, his head buried in his arms. Tear tracks ran down his face as his whole body vibrated with the force of keeping them back. Reaching into his vest pocket he pulled forth the golden locket. Opening it shakily as he stared at the smiling faces inside.
Of course, then that damn man had to go and pull the cruelest trick off all.
In order to finally save the worlds...to use the Eternal sword...they would have to defeat Origin. Kratos was Origins seal. That means they would have to defeat Kratos to get to Origin. There was no guarantee that his father would survive.
The ball Lloyd had formed became smaller.
How could he do this? How could he find the strength mentally or physically fight him? This was his father goddamn it!!!! How was he expected to do this when his heart and mind were tearing him to shreds?!?!
Lloyd could feel it now. He had fallen apart and he just didn't have the power to stop it anymore. He felt the first sob escape his lips and all hope was lost. He let lose all that was inside him. He held nothing back as he let everything fall down.
The last expected voice on the whole of two worlds spoke softly as arms slowly encircled him.
"Things fall apart, it is up to you to use the broken puzzle pieces to build a better tomorrow."
Tears fill my eyes as I look up. Kratos now stands a little away from me. A pair of translucent blue wings fluttered behind him.
We simply looked at each other for what felt like hours. No words were needed.
I looked down at the floor to see a single blue feather laying in stillness. Reaching out, I took it and slowly, as gently as I could, I twined it around and inside the gold locket. I placed the warm necklace back inside my vest to see my father staring at me.
For a moment I thought I saw tears in his eyes.
Then he had crossed the room with one foot already out the window when he leaned back, "Good night, Lloyd."
He was gone...but even still...
"Good night,...Dad."
Till next time...
Obediently yours,
BlackMoon13