Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.
Author note: I read a post on another site that said that Snape's patronus was a doe, like Lily's was, because he was obsessed with her. I disagree. from what we know of his life, I think it is likely that his time with Lily may be his happiest memories, therefore resulting in a similar patronus. This is not fact and you don not by any means have to agree, but it is my theory and I'm sticking to it. Hope you enjoy this little drabble.
"To conjure a patronus you must focus your happiest thoughts."
He tried. He really did. He thought of his mother's smile, so rare but genuine.
Nothing.
He thought of receiving his first potions set. He had been happy then, but he'd also saw the way that his mother had went without a winter coat that year.
Nothing.
He thought of how smug he had been when he had corrected a school textbook. Even the masters of the subject had gotten something wrong. But smug was not exactly happy.
Again, nothing. No sharp spark or smoke like wisp of magic emerged from the end of his wand. Nothing.
Glancing around the room discreetly, he saw the antlered form of Potter's patronus. Beside him, Black the Blood traitor, as Lucius has taken to calling him also had a mangy blue figure padding around his table. Of course they would have no trouble in casting this particular charm, the prats.
A glorious laugh pulled his glare away. Lily had her head thrown back in a way that made her hair cascade towards the ground. Her eyes were shut and her cheeks were bright with blush at the expense of an appalled looking Remus Lupin sharing her desk. To the right of a smoky wolf form stood a doe. Blue and so vivid it was almost solid. Lily's patronus.
It didn't surprise him that it matched that idiot Potter's. He didn't even really care, he was too caught up in the way the charms soft magic glow lit up her face. He missed her. He regretted the nasty word that had slipped out of his mouth. He knew he was in the wrong and he knew he would have to live with it. Live with it, he could, as long as she was happy. And she was happy. He watched her, with her head tossed back, cheeks flushed, and bubbling laughter. It reminded him of days before Hogwarts, before Potter, before he had even known that horrible word, before talk of war. She had been happy then and only a fool would think that she wasn't happy now. She was and that was all he needed.
So caught up in his thought, he didn't notice the silent tendril of blue that flowed from his wand or the form taking shape at his side. Nor did he notice the vibrant red head across the class studying him. Lily looked on as the airy replica of her own charm materialized and grazed against the Slytherin's robed arm. He had done it. Not only had he cast a difficult spell, word-less, none the less, but the charm had taken the shape of a doe. Same as hers. A matching set, she heard her sister sneer in her head. "The two of you are just alike. A matching set. Freaks, the both of you." She had squealed. Lily had cried and somehow he had managed to jinx a vine into tripping Petunia's retreating figure, making her laugh through her tears. Her heart ached. She missed him, no matter the vile word he had used for her. They had been great friends once, and he had tried to apologize. She had never seen him look as low as he did now, lips tight, eyes tired and surrounded my dark circles.
A loud crash jerked her attention to a one Sirius Black laying upended on the floor, laughing manically. She risked another glance at the Slytherin tables, he hadn't even blinked. She decided then, with the charm long disappeared, that she wanted him to be happy. She would do everything she could to make Severus Snape happy again. Nothing would stand in her way.
Nothing.
AU: What did you think? Is it awful?