"Again", Tim sighed. "Try again".
This was your nineteenth time of trying. You hit the first nine notes perfectly, but your left hand didn't seem to want to follow suit. You wait for the BONG of hitting the wrong note, and screw your face up when you hear it.
"Sorry", you mumbled, clenching your tired hands into fists.
"It's okay", Tim said reassuringly "We'll get there in the end. Even if it takes all night".
Derren and Rosie were sat at the opposite side of the room on the settee. Derren watching the piano recital, and Rosie flicking through the newspaper. After meeting the two girls after one of Derren's shows, Tim had promised Teagan he d help teach her to play Fur Elise on the piano, in time for a show she was performing at. He d stayed true to his word, and Teagan had received a phone call the previous morning inviting the girls over to Derren's house for lunch and piano practice.
"Maybe your brain needs fuel", Tim suggested, getting up from his stool and clicking his aching back. "Be back in a sec".
You sighed and (carefully) flopped yourself onto the piano, resting your head on your arms.
"Ignore him", Rosie muttered, trying her hardest to complete the easy sudoku in the newspaper. "He's just huffy because he's a huff".
"But I'm trying, I really am!" you cried.
"I know you are, pickle", Rosie said, looking up. "You're trying really hard, and you're doing so well. You'll get it soon. I know you can".
Derren got up and walked towards you. He sat himself on the stool Tim had been sat on for the past four hours, placing a hand on your shoulder. You sighed, staring at the piano.
"When's the concert?" he asked.
"Tomorrow night. 7:30pm".
"Hmm", he pondered. "So that gives us...?"
You look over to the clock on the mantelpiece, and try not to scream in dismay.
"Twenty-two hours, twenty-five minutes. Nineteen hours, twenty-five minutes until the rehearsal", you feel tears starting to prickle in your eyes. Derren gives your shoulder a squeeze. An 'it'll be okay, trust me' squeeze.
Tim re-entered the room with a notepad and pen.
"Pizza?" he asked.
"Pizza?" exclaimed Rosie, looking up from the newspaper.
"Pizza?" asked Derren, looking at you, giving you a reassuring smile.
"Pizza!" you smile, beaming at Derren, giving a nod, and then at Tim.
"Right then", Tim said, flicking open the notepad. "Derren, your order?"
"Ham and pineapple. And peppers. Please. Thank you".
Tim scribbled in his notepad. "Rosie?"
"Meat Feast, please! All the meat. In and around my mouth..."
"Rosie!" you exclaimed, laughing.
"What?" Rosie replied. "Meaty pizza is yum".
"Meaty pizza is yum..." Tim mumbled, scratching more words onto the pad. "Teagles?"
You ponder for a moment. Margherita seems tempting, but then there's chicken and avocado. Oh but chicken and feta. Chicken, you want chicken. Do they do a pizza that's just chicken?
"Can I have chicken, please?"
A beat.
"A chicken pizza?" Rosie asked, getting distracted from the sudoku once again.
"You can have more than one topping, you know", Tim said, writing the word 'chicken?' next to Teagan's name.
"I would like chicken. And cheese. And some other bits, please. You choose, Rosie".
"Oh, I don't bloody know!" Rosie sighed, scribbling out a bunch of numbers from the sudoku.
"Right", Tim began, peering through his glasses at the notebook. "Derren; ham, pineapple and peppers. Rosie; meaty pizza is yum . Me; all the cheese. Teagan; chicken and whatever Rosie chooses".
"Not anything spicy though. Like chill", you say.
"Damn it", hisses Rosie.
"Not...chilli..." Tim mumbled into his notepad again. "Right, come on Riles", Rosie looked up again, "You're my helper-outer. We need to go to my place first, though". Rosie got up and starting slipping her feet into her shoes.
Tim walked over to where you and Derren were sat. He put an arm around you.
"Keep practicing, yeah?" he smiled, pressing a kiss on top of your head.
"I will", you sighed, weakly smiling back.
"Good girl. See you late" , he said, giving you a squeeze. "See you later, Derren", he nodded at the man sat next to you as he started walking out the door.
"Why are we going to yours?" Rosie inquired, walking to catch up with Tim.
"Because". Tim said, turning round and raising an eyebrow at Rosie, then left the room. She twigged straight away.
"Ohhh", she sighed, following him. As she walked past you, she gave you a double thumbs up. You laughed to yourself, whilst Derren looked on.
"Bye!" Rosie called, shutting the front door. There was a second of silence before Derren turned to you.
What was the...", he imitated Rosie's thumbs up, "for?".
"They're shagging", you say, absentmindedly, lightly brushing your fingers over the piano keys.
"Blimey!" Derren huffed.
"Oh god! Crap! Sorry! Sorry, I shouldn't have...oh no", you stammered.
"It's fine. I had an inkling anyway", Derren shrugged. "Anyway, back to this". He pulled his stool closer to the piano.
"This", you sigh "is hopeless".
"It's not hopeless if you have the right tutor", Derren smiled, looking down at the piano.
"Tim is a good tutor", you protest. "My hands just don t want to co-operate. And the show's tomorrow. And I still don't know what to wear. And-"
"And you re panicking", Derren interrupted. You nod. "And you need to calm down". You nod again. "And you need to relax". His voice dropped to a lower tone. You take a deep breath and slowly nod.
"Would you like my help?" Derren continues, his voice still deep. You have a vague idea of what's going to happen, but you're not one to object. You smile.
"Go on then", you sigh.
"This isn't cheating, by the way. This is just a helpful step in the right direction". He shifted himself over towards you. "Okay?".
"Okay".
"Now get yourself comfortable and close your eyes". His voice is almost a baritone. You close your eyes, leaving your hands resting on the keys of the piano. Derren talks you through into a trance, your legs feel heavy yet your head feels light. It's the most comfortable you've ever been, and Derren's voice seems to soothe all your anxieties away. As he's talking, you can feel your hands slowly moving up and down the piano, pressing the cold keys. As Derren continues talking, you find yourself sat in the concert hall you'll be performing at tomorrow. You're wearing your favourite dress, and you can feel that you look amazing. You look out into the audience. The entire place is empty, except for one person in the front row.
That person being Derren Brown.
"Play for me".
You hear the crooning words echo around your brain. Keeping your focus entirely on Derren, you begin to play. The notes sound perfect, your hands flowing up and down the Steinway piano, the music sounding absolutely beautiful. Derren and your surroundings start to fade as you feel yourself coming out of your trance. You find yourself back in Derren's living room, hands still flowing, elegant music continuing to play. Derren is still sat next to you, with a hand on your leg. You look down at your hands, where the music is coming from. You look over at Derren and give him a huge smile. You mouth a "thank you", and Derren replies with a satisfied nod.
You heard the front door shut, the smell of the delicious bad food that tastes good twirling up your nose.
"Pizza, pizza, motherfuckin pizza"! you heard Rosie sing, as Tim beatboxed in the background. Rosie came dancing into the room, pizza boxes stacked in her arms. She shuffled over to where you and Derren were sat on the settee, watching the news.
"Mr Brown", she said, bending down and allowing Derren to take the top pizza box.
"Miss Teagles", you took the next box. Rosie then shuffled over to the other settee and set herself down with the last two boxes.
"Me and Minchin", she said to herself, opening up the boxes. Tim soon entered the room with four bottles of Becks in his hands.
"Drinks"! he announced, with a grin on his face. He placed two bottles on the coffee table in front of you and Derren and then took the other two over to Rosie.
"Go steady with this one, yeah?" he mumbled, passing the bottle to her.
"I will", she sighed, immediately taking a swig. Tim sat himself down next to her.
"She"s already had three", he says to you.
"Two". Rosie retorted.
"Three"
"Two"
"Three"
"Two and a half"
"Three"
Pause.
"Yeah, three", Rosie giggled, taking another swig. You laugh and take a bite from your pizza. The pizza is covered in chicken and barbeque sauce. Perfection.
"So, how'd you two get on then?" Derren piped up, taking a bite from his own pizza, licking his lips with satisfaction.
"Us?" Tim asked, piling stringy cheese on top of his pizza. "Yeah. We found the pizza place okay. Not that long a queue. So...yeah...".
"And did you do what needed to be done at home?" he further enquired.
"Oh, yes!" Rosie laughed, shoving a large portion of pizza into her own mouth. You and Derren both burst out laughing.
"Rosie!" Tim hissed, shocked, glaring at her.
"Oh come on, Timothy!" she laughed, mouth full of pizza. "They know!" she says, pointing at you both. "And they won't tell a soul, will they?" she raised an eyebrow at you.
"Of course not", you say, taking another bite of pizza, smiling. "It's cute".
"It is, isn't it?" Derren smiled, giving Tim a little nod of approval. Tim sighed, pushing a bit of cheese that was hanging from his mouth back where it belonged, and put an arm around Rosie, planting a kiss on her head.
"Cheers mate", she said.
"S'alright mate", he replied.
"Barf!" you laugh, continuing to annihilate your pizza.
You all sit in the living room, full of pizza and watching whatever crap soap opera was on the telly.
"Go on then", Tim piped up at you, shifting awkwardly in his seat trying not to wake the sleeping Rosie that was curled up against him.
"Go on then?" you say, looking confused.
"Fur Elise. Play it", he said, tilting his head over to the piano.
"Oh", you began. "I, um". Derren leaned over towards you and whispered something in your ear.
"Play for me".
You feel a warm sensation wash over you, and your mind begins to clear. You stand up and head towards the piano. Tim gives Derren a questioning look. Derren only shrugs his shoulders. You sit on your stool, and place your fingers on the keys. You look over at Derren, and he nods at you to begin to play. And you do. Beautifully.
You finish, and let out a satisfied sigh. There s a moment of silence.
"What the fuck?" Tim shouts, waking up Rosie. "That's not fucking...that's cheating. You cheated! Derren, she cheated!".
"No she didn't. She had a good tutor", Derren smiled smugly.
"What happened?" Rosie mumbled, half-conscious. "Did you do a good, Teagan?"
"I did a good", you smile.
The concert was a great success. You got a standing ovation, and you could hear Rosie screaming "Go on, Teagles!" from the front were now sat backstage with Derren, Tim and Rosie after having shared a bottle of wine. Tim and Rosie soon made their excuses and got up to leave. Rosie threw her arms around you.
"I'm so proud of you, Teagles", she whispered in your ear, giving your entire body a squeeze. "See you tomorrow, yeah?" You nod and watch her and Tim walk out the door. You and Derren sit at the table with a glass of wine each.
"Derren..." you begin tilting your glass of wine to examine it.
"Mmm?"
I have to learn to play some Chopin by next Tuesday...
There's a five second silence.
"Bugger". Came the reply.